| Leonardo Vs Donatello (semi final one) |
 |
 |
| So, yeah I drew out of a hat who would fight who.....well, I just kinda chose really....ah well. |
| Oooo, controversy. The pair that were arguably the closest out of the brothers being drawn in the first round (if you ask me they were a little too close if you catch my drift). Come on, I�m not the first and I doubt I�ll be the last to suggest that these guys only liked �Vegetarian� pizza if you see where I�m going. Who cares inbreeding is perfectly normal in the animal kingdom not like it would offend them. So they compare fairly evenly (both pussies). They bum off each other a little too much in my opinion, Leonardo would say �Hey, I think we should go left� and Donatello would say �Yeah, let�s go left. That�s a great idea. I love you Leonardo� damn pussies, always with this shit, they were blatant lovers. Round One: They dance around for a while like a pair of fairies, damn pussies. Not one punch thrown or a weapon used with violent intent, it�s dicks like these pair that give forcing a pair of brothers to fight till the death for entertainments sake a bad name. The danced around some more before I ended it. It wasn�t the end of the round I was just scared that if this went on any longer they�d both burst out into a screaming rendition of YMCA, dance and all, in fact it wouldn�t surprise me if they both had constumes prepared�.sissies. Nobody won this round, they both disappointed. Round Two: To spice things up a little I spread a rumour that Leonardo said �That little thing Donatello did before performing the art of love was tired, embarrassing and couldn�t turn on a light switch� so if the fight isn�t good at least their relationship is on the rocks. Unfortunately my plan backfired, they sat down and decided to �talk it over�, what the fuck? Since when have badass mutant heroes talked it over, the main lesson I learnt from this cartoon was that all problems (bar none) could be solved with intense violence�it�s been the foundation of my person since I can remember. They �talked it over� for the whole god damn round, damn pussies. I slapped them both in a last attempt to aggravate them, this didn�t work either. They just got upset and refused to talk to me, they just sat their sulking�..I felt bad, so I rang the bell. The silence was eerie. No winner Round Three: This round was as eventful as the last. I tell a lie, Leonardo slipped up, so I laughed. Donatello then told me off for laughing and being �Insensitive� so I pimp slapped his ass (I will be soon writing an article on how to deliver the perfect pimp slap). He/She then started to cry, I can�t believe these guys stood up to Shredder, they�re a disgrace to mutant turtles around the world and a right pair of sissies. They spent the whole damn round telling each other that they were �Better than this�� and how they �Shouldn�t feel bad, because the tried their best� I thought I was gonna puke, my (former) heroes being in touch with their feminine side�what the fuck? I was gonna end the round just to stop my pain, then I thought �Wait a cotton picking minute�nobody has won a single round�, I should have disqualified them both for having no bollocks. Not completely sure whether turtles have the ordinary meat and two veg, but you get my meaning. Anyhow, I need to find a fairway to decide who goes through, I suggested arm wrestling, but they both had nail varnish drying. So then I suggested tossing for it�they were a bit too eager. So sickened I walked off, telling them to sort it out themselves. Once I�d returned after emptying my stomach, they had decided that Leonardo would go through because �He was more equipped to win�. Bet that wasn�t the first time Donatello lay down for Leo. Leonardo goes through. |