| My Story.... |
| Age: 58 Height: 5'7" Weight: 160 Measurments: 38-31-36 Martial Status: Married to a Loving and Understanding Wife. Residence: Sacramento, CA Interests: Dancing, Computers, Cooking, Karaoke & Motorcycling. |
| I smile when it sit down and think about telling my story. Sometimes I really can�t believe the exciting journey I have lived over the last 50 years. I have read hundreds of other stories within our unique community and for some reason I so often feel sad at hearing the struggle portrayed in their words. But I know now that any journey will have its trials we must face. Yes, I to have had times of sadness in my life. We all do! But I can see now that I was really going through a process of individual growth. So this story I hope, leaves you the reader, a simple message. That regardless of what faces us, and the choices we make, we need to view the future knowing that �Everyday is a Great Day, just that some are better than others� My earliest memories of knowing that I was different was when I realized that in addition to enjoying all the normal boy things I also enjoyed all the normal girl things. Quietly within I remember wondering why I felt so much more at ease to play with the girls rather than the boys. Of course I would hide these feelings because I would get teased or perhaps worse if anyone knew. So for years I tried very hard to be all boy. Every sport was high on my list. I worked very hard to excel in Football, Baseball, Speed Skating and Track. Anything that created the feeling of being one of the guys and rejecting those strange feelings. Truth is though, I seemed more fascinated the more I denied the feelings. I didn't start wearing girl�s cloths though until I was a young adult. Now I�m not counting the times my mother would dress me up at Halloween in pretty girls clothes or my aunt would let me were her night gown when I slept over. Where I seemed to focus almost all my attention was wearing make-up. Now that I enjoyed very early, say 8-9 years old. Being the oldest I got to stay up later than my brother and sisters. When my parents would go out in the evenings and I would be the babysitter, it gave me the opportunity to wear my Mom�s make-up. My mom was very pretty and I would love to watch he put on her makeup. I liked the way it made you prettier. For me that seemed to be enough during those early years. I still feel the same way about make-up. I love it. When I go out now as Dianna, my make-up is priority number one. After high school it was off to the Air Force. This was another of my macho periods. Again I was bound and determined to bury those feelings once and for all. It worked of a few years, but once again I was faced with this huge urge to wear make-up. By this time I was married and my wife was pregnant with our first of five children. Have you ever hear about the fox guarding the hen house. Guess what my wife did for a living? She was a beautician and it was during the time that wigs were the fashion. Now how could I resist all that free make-up and selection of wigs. For the next 21 years I slowly progressed (in the closet) to going out in the evenings and driving around. Oh Yes, I did purge many times and went through the inner confusion always asking the question �Why Me?� I even tried to bury my feelings with 20 years of diligent religious involvement. But every time I though I had a handle on things I found myself back to wearing make-up and expressing my feminine side as often as I could. Then I purchased my first computer�now I�m sure you can fill in the rest of the story. WOW! I�m not the only one in the universe with these feelings. I can happily say that I have never looked back. Sure it�s been with days if questioning where these feeling will take me, but I have no regrets in the choices I have made since then. |
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