Editorial Note: The following is Part I of the 20th anniversary report of  the francophone married priest association of Belgium: "Hors-les Murs"  (Outside-the Walls), as it appeared in their bulletin: hlm, #79,  Feb. 2000, pp.5-11, 15-16. Part II: "What Ministries Tomorrow" will  appear in the next issue of The Journal. Translation by François Brassard.

Part I: Our Journey: 
1) It has been said of some [of the resigned priests] that "they left to  get married." Its true! After a well protected youth and hot house  seminary experience, they knew nothing either of the feminine world or of the  richness of the man/woman encounter. In a love encounter they rediscovered  themselves, more mature, more adult.

2) For others, the journey has been quite different. The Church rapidly put  an end to the movement initiated by the [Vatican II] Council. The hopes of many  were dashed! "Humanae vitae," in July 1968, failed to recognize full  personal responsibility. Some could not accept that. For them the Jesus  discovered at the heart of struggles for justice, and who lived in Basic  Communities and in liberation theology, was first suspect and then rejected.

3) Others realized that there was no place for theological reflection, if it  meant questioning the traditions of the past!! Then came that Roman decision to  appoint only "safe" Bishops and to force them on communities with the  admonition to restore "orthodoxy."

In fact, the motivations for leaving were often mixed. And at the critical  moment of choice, it was an institution that had ceased being a source of  inspiration and hope that tipped the scales. Life was elsewhere. Fidelity to God  called us to be true to ourselves rather than to an institution that claimed  that its will and Gods will were identical. And it should be pointed out  that some of us left before any human love had taken root in our heart. So, each  member of HLM made the decision to leave, not without internal struggles  nor devastating isolation brought on by communities and people with whom they  had journeyed. Nevertheless, it was a step in the direction of liberation and  personal growth, based on a more fundamental fidelity to life, rather than to  guilt-ridden transgression. Of this we are witnesses, whether we left a year ago  or 30 years ago.

Having to find food, work, shelter, all that plunged us into the real world  of lay people, from which our clerical state had shielded us. It challenged us  to grow! A love relationship revealed to us the treasures of communication, of  profound exchanges, of pleasures, of fulfillment. On the other hand, it also  introduced us to self-sacrifice, naked honesty and self-confidence of  unsuspected depth. - For the most part, we have children. What richness in this  human experience, what fulfillment it carries! And also, what total self-denial  and immolation! It is a responsibility that calls us naturally to live  out the caring love of the Gospel. In short, the step we took was a gamble on  life, one that never ceases to produce fruit. 

There are some among us who became strangers to the faith they had preached,  indifferent toward the Church where they had lived. Almost all, however,  recognize that they are still called in varying degrees by Jesus Christ. Some  energize themselves in small communities. Others have assumed parish  responsibilities, for example, in catechesis. Some have even managed to find  work in pastoral ministries. Almost all of us live in the hope of seeing our  children grow up, embracing, like us, a personal faith. However, it isn't  any more simple for us than it is for other christian parents. Each one of us  tries to respond to the calls and responsibilities of life one day at a time. We  believe that it is first there that God speaks to us: in day to day life. We  hope that in 10 years, in 20 years, and later, other believers will follow who  will tell the story of Jesus Christ and bear personal witness to the belief that  he is alive! 

We don't know where the institutional Church is headed. Is she still  capable of conversion and profound renewal? What would be her role in the years  to come? Today, we see her aging, fixated, and increasingly irrelevant. We who  knew her from within do not think it useful anymore to fight for hierarchical  reform. We feel it is more important to live fully the present moment. God is in  life before being in the Church. And if this institution continues to cut itself  off from life? As such, it could only disappear. But wouldn't there still  be believers? These remarks notwithstanding, we strongly support the movement  "We Are Church," which we see as a community of believers; and we  support other groups like P.A.V.E.S (Pour un Autre Visage d'Eglise et de  Société - For Another View of Church and Society). Also, we  consider ourselves brothers of Bishop Gaillot and of many others who struggle  "Outside-the Walls" (Hors-les Murs).

Let us go forth, let us dare, let us take risks! "To transgress does not mean to oppose; rather, it is to advance beyond the norms presently established in order to respond better to both human and evangelical demands” (Pierre  de Locht).