Dying by degrees

Rachel huddled in the supply compartment, her hands trembling. Sweat soaked every stitch of clothing she had on. The phaser felt slippery in her hands. Through the air vents in the compartment, she could see what was left of the engineering room.

The Borg had assimilated most of the bay. The warp drive had been parasitized by numerous tendrils, glowing green in the light. Almost directly in front of her was the assimilation chamber, where Rachel watched her friends and coworkers mutilated and dehumanized by the Borg. Over thirty crew members had been converted. The Borg injected them with something to make them docile. They simply waited in line to have their eyes gouged out, or their limbs removed, or whatever other horrors the Borg had in store.

Today was supposed to be a normal shift. She and Barclay were to work on repairing the warp drive tertiary inducer manifold systems. Barclay was a funny person. He had been after her for quite a while, but was so terrified of her any attempt at romance invariably turned into a farce. Once She ran into him in ten-forward. He had been so terrified that he almost screamed. Despite his bumbling, Rachel had finally agreed to have dinner with him tonight. He nearly had a heart attack.

God I hope he made it out she thought. She had one hell of an excuse though. Sorry I can't make dinner Reg, I've been assimilated. Oh, okay. Let me find my face and put it on.

The Borg had taken all the engineering staff and converted them. She hadn't seen LaForge or Barclay being transformed, so she assumed that they were on the planets surface.

I never thought I would die 200 years before I was born, she thought. I wonder if that would make her negative 175 years old? Of course, death was the best option she could hope for today. They say if you are assimilated your consciousness lives on forever in the collective.

LaForge had put her on Beta crew after she had a poor evaluation record. There was no need for that, he thought she would do better in a less competitive arena.

She didn't blame LaForge. He had no way of knowing what would happen on board the ship. For all she knew, the Borg had already assimilated Earth. They already destroyed the Phoenix, Zephram Cochraine's revolutionary ship that ushered in Earth's warp age and made first contact with the Vulcans possible.

Rachel suddenly froze, afraid to move or even think. There was someone outside the compartment. Her breathing and heartbeat picked up. Fortunately, she had learned some Vulcan relaxation techniques at the Academy which helped her calm herself.

"Rachel?" said a voice. "Are you in there? It's okay! It's all over. We've pushed the Borg off the ship. Bad news is you're on cleanup detail."

Rachel almost fainted with relief. She recognized the voice, it was Ghassan, a lower level engineer on her work shift. She wanted to yell out but was too terrified. Maybe it isn't really him, she thought.

Ghassan, or what was left of him, passed in front of the compartment. Half his skull had been crudely sawn away and replaced with a transparent dome. His face was relatively unharmed, perhaps explaining why he was able to mimic a human voice so well.

She hadn't seen him being assimilated. There must be two assimilation chambers operating on the ship.

Barclay and LaForge must be dead, She thought. They were processed in one of the other chambers. The Borg walked on a bit further, still calling her name. Fortunately, none of the crew had seen her hide in the compartment. The cowards way out, they would have called this at the academy. But still, she was alive.

She had deactivated her combadge to prevent the Borg finding her, if they had tapped into the ships internal sensors.

Assimilation was a disgusting, but somewhat fascinating process. The first step was to inject the nanoprobes into a person, altering their biochemistry. The nanoprobes formed organs and nodes at key points on the body where prosthetics would later be attached.

After the probes were injected, the person was lead to the surgical table in the assimilation chamber, where they were fitted with whatever the Borg desired at the moment. Her friend Sarah was designated a medical drone and given the appropriate attachments.

She always wanted to be in medicine, thought Rachel grimly. She wondered what Barclay would be like as a drone. She couldn't imagine him as a Borg.

You will be assimilated, I..i.... if that's okay. Otherwise I can come back later. Seeing Sarah reminded her of her other friends on the enterprise. She had seen many of her crew mates lead to the surgical table and violated.

A surge of hope ran through her body. Amanda. She and Rachel were best friends at the academy. Then Rachel was transferred to the enterprise, before Q came and took her off the ship. Amanda was a Q as well, except she didn't know it at the time.

There was no way Amanda would let her die. They were like sisters. They even planned to have their weddings the same year and serve on the same ship after that. Rachel was going to be chief engineer, and Amanda was going to marry the Captain.

Now Amanda was a god, or as close to one as you can get, and Rachel was about to be assimilated. Time is a funny thing.

She hoped that Amanda would come sweeping in and destroy the Borg. How could she let this happen to her? To the enterprise? Did the Q really care that little about humanity or their former friends to let them die? She had hoped Amanda would be different than the other Q. She should have known better. There is an old earth saying, Absolute power corrupts absolutely. Amanda was no different than any other Q.

That's not fair! came a voice from inside her head.

"Amanda?" She shrieked. Fortunately, no assimilations were taking place and the hum of the engines helped to drown out any noise she made.

Yes. You have to be absolutely quiet. Just think what you want and I will hear it.

Rachel shook and started to cry. She hoped that Amanda was for real, and wasn't just a voice in her head.

What are you going to do? She asked Amanda. There was no response. Hello?

Give me a minute. came the telepathic response. It's going to be okay Rach.

She felt a warm comfort spread across her chest and she stopped shaking. She wasn't sure if it was Amanda doing it, or she was just relived that Amanda was here.

Suddenly there was a loud mechanical choral voice from outside the locker. "You will be assimilated Ensign Rachel Webster. Resistance is futile." Mechanical hands began pounding away at the locker door.

Rachel felt a tingling sensation spreading over her body. She shut her eyes. Suddenly, she felt a hand shaking her. She screamed and opened her eyes.

"Rachel! It's me!" said the blonde haired girl. Rachel hugged Amanda and burst into tears. She was no longer in the supply locker, but on a balcony overlooking a waterfall. She thought the location was Reisa, but wasn't sure. Amanda helped her to her feet and helped her to a chair. A fresh pot of coffee was there, along with some pastries.

Over coffee, Rachel poured out the details of the ships assimilation. Then talk turned to other details. After a while, Rachel calmed down and forgot about the Borg altogether.

"I missed you all so much. How is the ship? Any new men in your life?"

"Well, if you count Reginald then yes."

"Barclay? Oh God Rach..." Amanda laughed. "How's Riker?" Amanda had quite a crush on Riker when she was on the ship.

"He's doing okay. You will never guess who's going out with Troi!"

"Who?"

"Worf!" Amanda laughed again. The two women continued talking long into the night.

At the break of dawn, The coffee was finished and the two girls had finished off the pastries.

"I'm so sorry for what I thought. I should have known you wouldn't let me die like that." Amanda turned away and burst into tears.

"What's wrong?" Amanda was silent for a long time.

"I have to send you back." Rachel opened her mouth in protest, but Amanda cut her off before she could continue. "It's one of the Q rules. I can take you out of your time frame for as long as you want, but I have to return you to exactly the same time I took you from."

"Why?" said Rachel, feeling betrayed.

"It's the Q version of the prime directive."

"Why did you take me out if you are just going to put me back in?"

"You were right. I just couldn't stand by and watch you die. I had to say goodbye." Rachel stared at her for a moment.

"Can't you just... I don't know, clone me or something?"

"That wouldn't be acceptable. I'm sorry."

"Why not?"

"I'm already in a lot of trouble with the Continuum." Rachel didn't push it. She remembered that Amanda's real parents were killed by the continuum when they decided to live on the Earth.

"Can I say goodbye to my parents?"

"Of course." Amanda concentrated and then they were on Earth, in the 23rd century before the Borg invasion. Amanda phased herself into the continuum while Rachel talked with her parents.

"Why are you making me do this?" Amanda asked nothing in particular. Nothing in particular replied back.

"It's a part of your development."

"I loved her. She was my best friend." Q materialized beside her.

"I know. It's hard to watch the humans you care about go through this, but eventually they all die. You can't always be there for her." Amanda had seen the arrogance of Q firsthand when she was aboard the enterprise. As she came to know him as an equal, she realized he wasn't arrogant, just being cautious. It was a defense, and it was a lesson Amanda still had to learn. Q was right. Amanda couldn't protect everyone she loved in the universe. Eventually, they would die.

"Can't we just displace her to a different part of the ship?"

"You're missing the point. We could displace her, or transport her to the surface. There wouldn't be any significant damage to the time line. Whether she is assimilated or not, it makes no difference. She is historically irrelevant."

"Then why can't we save her? You act like she doesn't matter."

"She doesn't." Amanda turned her back to Q, which was kind of a useless gesture in the continuum.

"I didn't mean for it to sound like that. She obviously means a lot to you, and I can understand that. Look at it from our perspective. What would happen if one of the Q decided they supported the Borg collective? They would wipe out half the galaxy in a matter of months. Another Q would step in to stop them, and... Well I don't have to tell you what would happen if the Q got involved in another civil war." Amanda was still silent. Q continued. "When her species ceases to exist, you will still be 20 years old. You will never get older, and never die. She will. You have to face that reality, that is why we brought you here." Amanda was silent for an eternity. Then she spoke.

"I suppose I should be grateful. If the continuum didn't allow me to make that temporal bubble around the enterprise, my parents," Amanda caught her mistake. "Adoptive parents, would still be assimilated, along with the rest of earth. At least now they have a chance." Both she and Q were silent for a while.

"Are you ready to send her back now?"

Amanda nodded at Q. She phased out of the continuum.

Amanda materialized just inside the front door of the Webster household. A wave of guilt washed over her. She had been here before, when she was on the Enterprise. Rachel had invited the orphaned Amanda home with her for the holidays.

As if on cue, Rachel's mother walked into the foyer.

"Oh hello Amanda. I didn't hear you come in."

"I'm sorry. Is Rachel in?"

"Sure, I'll get her. Is everything okay?"

"Yes. No. Not really, it's hard to explain. Can you just get her?" Amanda apologized again to Rachel's mother.

Amanda had changed a lot since the Enterprise. She would never have mouthed off to anyone like she just did. Maybe Rachel was right, she was just like the other Q.

Not by a long shot, thought Amanda. Rachel entered the room, dressed in a new clean starfleet uniform.

"Come on, we're out of here." said Amanda as she grabbed Rachel's arm. They both vanished in a puff of smoke.

Looking in from the continuum, Q sighed and followed her.

The light and sound was horrifyingly intense. Rachel was screaming and trying to make sense of her surroundings. Amanda touched her arm and suddenly she was alright.

"Where are we?" she asked.

"Betelgeuse." replied Amanda.

"I've been there, and there's nowhere like this."

"We're standing on the solar core mass."

"Oh. So what happens now?"

"We can hide for a bit. The Continuum won't be after us forever."

"Yes we will." said Q as he materialized on the solar core. "You've disappointed me Amanda." She spun to grab Rachel and found that she was gone.

"Where is she!?" she screamed.

"I put her back."

"Q, please." she begged. "You can't be this cruel. You said she didn't really matter either way."

"I'm sorry."

"I would do anything if you let her live."

"I know you would, and that is why she has to die." Amanda buried her face in her hands.

Rachel found herself back inside the closet. She begged Amanda to come back, but there was no voice inside her head. Maybe she hallucinated it. The voice rang out again.

"Resistance is futile. Release the door lock mechanism and accept assimilation.". The hands continued to tear away at the door. Rachel took the phaser out of her pocket and set it to overload. Then she replaced it in her holster and unlocked the cabinet. When the Borg reached in, she offered her hand without resistance.

Moments later, a newly assimilated drone removed the phaser from its body and disabled the overload. Then it was escorted to the surgery table, where it was fitted with prosthetic implements.

And somewhere far away, an immortal girl died just a little bit.