Devi talks a lot. A whole lot. And sometimes, she says something really cool and funny. A lot more of the times, Devi says something really stupid and funny. All of the worthwhile and memorable ones go down here, in the Hall of Quotes. As well as Devi's stupidity, other peoples' cool/funny/stupid quotes go here, too.
Devi's Quotes
You want some of this white wizard shit?! - While playing as Gandalf in a preview of the LotR: Return of the King game at Comic-Con
It's like tickling. It doesn't hurt, but it sucks.
Dehbehdeh.
(After being informed of what a Bridal Show was) "Oh, I thought they brought out brides and were like, 'Hey, look at this one!'"
She has like, the tightest buns I've ever seen! - On The Practice's Helen Gamble's choice hairstyle
This is Aragorn getting hit by arrows: 'Damnit, I hate splinters!!' and pulls them out.
I don't think I can walk. - After having a very slashy online RP as PotC characters
What's the point in counting calories your entire life? Actually, what's the point in counting anything... - Me to my mum about dieting
Everything begins and ends with sex.
Salina: Where would you want to be?
Me: I dunno, anywhere is better than here. - Annoyed me at Ojai
Man, my legs are so crossed, they're braided.
Heart! - Said especially to Emily :)
Take off my pants. - On someone else wearing my costume
Handcuffs shouldn't be that much fun.
For sure!
Sex, food and sleep. Give me all three and happy I'll be.
Whatever, I'll have some cheese to go with my whine.
Salina: I like your Will [Turner]! He's nice.
Me: He's fag!
Now, see, it's better than sex. It's Star Wars.
Will is a sputtering pile of fag right now.
*Devi plays the Fullmetal Alchemist opening*
Mum *pause, listens*: Why can't I understand it?
Me: Mum, it's in Japanese.
I'm retarded at anything music, except, you know, buying it.
I love how Cris reads my quote page and her favourite one is one she said herself.
I'm getting fat and skinny becuase of my stupid film!
Other Peoples' Quotes (These are the best ones)
Don't make fun of your father. - Valerie on watching Pirates of the Caribbean and LotR with her future children
I love my mom because, you know, she's my mom. But I hate her as a person. - Kate
Kate: My head is an abyss.
Devi: Kate, what's an abyss?
Kate: It's a hole that goes on and on.
Devi: So your head is a hole that goes on and on?
Kate: Yes.
Go sell crazy someplace else. We're all stocked up here. - Salina
Don't cut the pigments! - Perez on Jessie cutting strips of paper with scraped off spinach pigment in AP Biology
Nicole: Ooh, they're hot.
Erin: Who, where? *looks around*
Nicole: The fries, Erin, the fries! - After Nicole ordered a plate of french fries at Disneyland
I'm going to explode in a red fire of uteran lining. - Erin on her really bad cramps
Two more hours 'till eternal bliss! - Jetlagged Cris on not being able to sleep until we ate in Ireland
Naomi: Here Cris, let me help you with your Spanish homework - *makes a violent scribbling motion* Como estas?!
Most likely to smite your ruin upon the mountain side... with a fruit bat. - Sarah's senior page's "most likely to."
Erin: I want to bone Legolas. Later, after a discussion about boning... Erin: Okay then, I want Legolas to bone me.
Erin: Oh my God, Devi, you have to come outside and look at the sky!
Me: Oh, dude, you always want me to come outside and stare at the sky!
Erin: No, come on. I'm being Viggo.
Me (Who is led otuside by Erin anyway): Then who am I?
Erin: Orlando.
Me: ...................
*While shaking his hands* Ahh dude, we're going to Endor! - My brother on Star Tours
Oh man, that hot guy was so hot! - Cris
Orlando: It was lovely meeting you, though! - To me at the RotK afterparty <3<3<3!!! ^____^
I love us! - Erin on our friends group obsessing about Orlando and LotR
Anna: Oh! And I love those tree-guys!
Me: The Ents?
Anna: Yeah! And I love how the one that was on fire wasn't on fire anymore! - Us on The Two Towers film
*while staring at the back of Will Turner's costume* Now I know what the slit in the back of Will's vest is for. - Salina
Anna: *gasps* The poofy dress! *points* I WANT IT!
Kate: You should... "what do you call it?" it! - referring to "commandeering" the Lady Washington
(After Sam's conversation with me about his seeing Big Fish)
Darren *shaking his head like a madman for no reason*: Sam, 10 guesses. Guess what I'm thinking right now.
Sam: Right now?
Darren: 10 guesses.
Sam: *A pause* Skittles?
Darren: No. *Holds up one finger* And by the way, if you lose, I get to kill you.
Sam: ...Skittles?
Darren: *Holds up another finger* No.
Sam: Drumming? *Darren holds up a third finger* Big Fish? *Another finger* Drumming?
Darren *Another finger* No! You idiot! Later...
Darren: Okay, put your mouth on the curb. - The 10th graders before our P.E. class
Tommy: This is Cris' last LiveJournal entry: "Hey guys! I'm going into ninth grade! Heh heh!" - On Cris NEVER updating her LJ
Kentucky is the most random state in California! - Ashlee C.
Kirill (my Ethics teacher): Okay guys, you have to be honest with yourselves now.
Michael W.: *quietly* Nooooooo...
Amanda (Out of fucking NOWHERE, after a long silence while I'm playing videogames): Pancakes?
Salina: I was thinking 'let's not introduce my mother to my love of slash tonight.'
Me: Oh! I have a good idea when you can!
Salina: The 12th of never?
Me: ...I was gonna say "never," but okay.
The best advice I can give you is to never make an important decision during an erection. - Unknown
Emily: Hey Devi, when they said "couples of different races," I thought of you.
Me: Aww, Emily! *hugs her*
Emily: Becuase we're like, going out, right? - After a Martin Luther King, Jr. assembly
Salina: I don't think I can look at anvils the same again.
I'm cramping. Another month still not pregnant. - Zack, on Amanda's quote
Brent: What's yuri? Sounds hot.
Cameron: Lesbians.
Brent: YEAHHH!! That IS hot!
Nicole: Hello... *peers very closely at his nametag and looks back up* ...Dave.
Ewan McGregor: Yeah, there's a film I want to be in her with. - on Halle Barry
Lucy: I hate it when people say movies are unrealistic. It's like saying that Bill & Ted is unrealistic. To them I say, "It's a Keanu movie. Accept it, or it's going to be a long night."
Valerie: Jesus H. Christ! Those are a lot of precious dealies, Devi. You have so many catch phrases it's redonkulous... but they all roxors hardcore. But I must know, what the random is dinkus? - on my list of catch words and phrases
Naomi: Dude, this was like, before the lands of time. *points* December 6th. (On February 26th)
Mandy (After I kicked a hole through my garage door): What are you going to tell your mom?
Me: I'm going to blame it on the dog.
Amanda: Oh, right. Freckles, in her one moment of energy, burst through the door!
Michael G.: To my knowledge, there were no Italian Jews in New York around that time.
*people all around the room start to disagree violently*
Michael G.: I said to my knowledge, fuckers, what! - Ethics class, about Once Upon a Time in America
*Megan D. And Michael G. start to disagree on something*
Megan D.: No, sorry, Michael, I have to say that you're wrong. *pokes at her ramen with a fork*
Michael G. *under his breath*: Yeah, go eat your Cup O' Noodles, you lil' freak. - Ethics class
Amanda: Their long faces... prehensile lips... horizontal pupils... Two words, man. Effed up. - on horses
Brent: Would you suck my vagina?
Anya (with a look of surprise): You got one?!
Jordan P.: Like, I ended up bailaring con myself.
Rolly, rolly! - Naomi about picking up my pencil under her swivel chair
Get up, rise and shine!!!!! - Naomi
Mike (teacher): How many Jews did Moses lead through the desert?
Billy B.: A grip. Like a thousand.
You can't "ducharse" la cara! - Vilma, my Spanish 4 teacher
Arielle R.: Since when are you a joy? - on Austen L.'s teacher's note from Hya
Anya (looking out the window): Jake is pissing me off.
Me: Well, he's not up here right now annoying you.
Anya: No, the way he looks.
Los racks estan muy close together. - My godmother on Loehmann's
Alice: Why can't I open my door?
Lee: Oh, I think your child safety lock is on.
Alice: *pause, then soft voice* I'm safe...
Anna: Oh my God, it was so shippy! After she kissed him he made the squiggly line face! - about Ron Stoppable
Chai [tea] is so how babies should taste. - Camille
I figured out why my dad beats my mom, everywhere! - Erin
Dude, I want to die and like, sneeze to death. - Mandy, while suffering from a cold
Naomi: There you are! You guys scared the shindiggles out of me! -in Ireland, after Cris and D disappeared and then came back
Amy: Anakin just saw the sand hit the water and was like, "Whoa, what the fuck is going on?" - about Anakin seeing the beach
Whoa, did Jennifer Aniston really have a miscarriage? - Erin after looking at the cover of National Inquierer
I should call up Dell and be like, "Everything's going to hell. Do something about it." - Mandy
Quotes: Grad Night Edition
Cris: Have you seen my sister naked? You can make a rug!
Tori L.: What? Is Njambi talking about balls?
Gabby B.: Ohh, you want to hear a gross story?
Tori: Is it about Njambi?
Gabby: No, it's about balls.
Emily: Guys, I'm sorry.
Cris: *quickly* No, it's okay, you're not Jew.
Cris: He's a doosh, and dooshes don't get laid. - on Nick Cloake
Arielle R.: You guys, it's not Day After Tomorrow.
Ashley C.: Yeah, it's Shrek 2. - right before we were forced to watch Day After Tomorrow
Cris: Tommy, what would you give Grad Night? I give it a 2.
Tommy: I give it a 6.
Cris: A 6? How you give it a 6?
Tommy: Cris, a 6 is barely passing!
Quotes, Continued
Tommy: This is Lord of the Rings, the short version. Once upon a time, there was a Ring. Then Frodo threw it into Mount Doom. The end! *sings the LotR theme*
Erin: Jeez, Ian, you're driving so recklessly!
Ian: No I'm not! Do you want me to put on my Ring of Recklessness, plus 5?
Alice: Have you seen I, Robot?
Me: No, I heard it kind of sucked.
Alice: Really? I heard it was massively good.
Edgar: Alice, we saw it!
Alice: Oh yeah! So I heard it was good from... myself.
Amanda: She's in the retarted Chinese mindset that men are better.
Anna: See Elise, you like people that you don't like!
Valerie: EDWARDS/JUDE LAW!!!!!!! *crosses legs violently* (John Edwards is cute. ^^)
Brent: No, Greg, you're that guy who casts those really annoying status effects. - trying to decide what kind of Final Fantasy characters we are
Arielle: But it's not really virginity, it's butt virginity. - about a guy "losing his virginity" to a guy fucking him
Matt: *looks at my slashy drawing of Obi-Wan and Anakin* Do you have to do that here? Put it away.
Prof. Minehan: Get away from me, you devil, or I'll smack you with my sandal. - on an ancient Greek statue
Matt: Daquiris can be virgin.
Carol: Like my men.
Kristen: She'll find totties in her e-mail if she keeps this up.
Amanda (call on cell phone): Are you driving?
Me: Yeah, going to class.
Amanda: Where were you, home?
Me: Crossroads.
Amanda: You're so retarded!
Carol *reads my wristband*: Dead Men Tell No Tales. True that, but maybe they do. If you're a forensic scientist!
You know you're queer when you have Cher in your iPod. - Arthur
(The AP test proctor comes towards us, sees us cheating) Proctor: What are you guys doing whispering?
Cris: *quickly* Can I have a pencil?
Cover for me. - Cris
Asscone you. - Arielle
I was assconed, I feel so special. - Katie
Cari (talking about me): I bet she's gonna have Asian babies.
Danilo: A hundred bucks says she will.
Cari: My brother was a triple major of Economics, Business Administration, and Computer Science.
Danilo: Dorkin' it up at UPenn.
That's the essense of Crossroads. Do everything half-assed and win anyway. - Cameron
Me: Oh my God, I want to play Matrix Online so badly.
Carol: Why?
Me: Becuase... the game rocks.
Carol: You just want to talk to your boyfriend!
Me: ...I'd like to play the damn game.
Carol: Aww, Elise wants to have sex with his avatar.
