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| Buy from the ROADKILL gift catalog! |
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| Happy ROADKILL fans cheer on their heroes to victory. |
| Be Part Of The ROADKILL Experience! |
| Any similarities to a lame-ass NFL team, real or imagined, are purely intentional |
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| Half-assed ROADKILL jerseys! Poorly made in the Lagao prison camps of Communist China! 100% guaranteed to be absolutely nothing like the ones worn on gameday! |
| The Misadventures of Team Mascot ROGER ROADKILL |
| While everyone looks on in disgust, Roger spews on the sidelines after "a pretty hard night" before performing in Week 12 |
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| Roger Roadkill gets beaten up by opposing team's "Glee Club" |
| Smushed On Someone Else's Road To The Title |
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| Roger Roadkill searching for something while moonlighting at Gainesville's "XMart" during another long off-season for ROADKILL |
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| copyright by Phil Norton |
12/7/58 Yale Lary fake punt on 4th and 22 at the 30 fails; Jim Martin late 25 yd FG is blocked: Giants 19-17 10/9/60 ROADKILL shut out 49ers until less than three minutes left, still manage to lose 14-10 12/17/61 Late in 4th, ROADKILL fall for fake FG and give up TD. Moments later, they give up real FG, lose to Eagles 10/7/62 Supposedly running out the clock, Milt Plum throws INT; Packers instantly kick FG to win, 9-7; Karras throws helmet at Plum 12/16/62 ROADKILL offer Bears 3 fumbles, 2 INTs, 3 missed FG's; lose 3-0 10/23/66 ROADKILL scores go-ahead TD w/ :51 left but celebrate too quickly, giving up a Brodie TD pass to lose to 49ers 12/11/66 Fans bomb coach Harry Gilmer w/ snowballs, singing "Bye Bye Harry" 8/15/67 ROADKILL 1st NFL team to lose to AFL team, dropping exhibition game to Broncos, 13-7 9/21/69 Steelers beat ROADKILL for only win of season, scoring TD w/ less than 3 minutes left 11/8/70 After starting season 5 of 15, Tom Dempsey kicks all-time record 63 yard FG w/ 2 seconds left to boost hapless Saints over ROADKILL 12/26/70 ROADKILL set record for losing lowest-scoring playoff game to Cowboys, 5-0 9/20/71 Errol Mann misses 5 FG's, including one w/ 33 seconds left: Vikings 16, ROADKILL 13 10/24/71 The only NFL player to die on the field, WR Chuck Hughes, collapses with a heart attack vs Eagles 7/28/74 One year after joining ROADKILL, former Super Bowl winning coach Don McCafferty has heart attack: ROADKILL responds w/ typical 7-7 season 9/26/76 Joe Reed messes up simple PAT snap w/ 3 minutes left: Vikings 10, ROADKILL 9 9/9/79 Mark Moseley misses FG, but ROADKILL flagged for 12 men on field; Mosely then hits: Redskins win 27-24 11/27/80 Bears tie score w/TD on last play of regulation and win on opening OT kickoff 12/20/81 With Division Championship on the line, ROADKILL choke in Red Zone 3 times, lose to Buccaneers 20-17 11/25/82 Lawrence Taylor returns INT 93 yards for winning score as Giants beat ROADKILL 13-6 12/31/83 Despite Monte Clark's televised sideline prayer, Eddie Murray misses wide right in playoff w/ 5 seconds left: 49ers 24, ROADKILL 23 11/27/86 Walter Stanley returns routine punt 85 yards for winning score w/ 41 seconds left for Packers 10/25/87 ROADKILL rallies from 24 pts down, take 33-31 lead; immediately give up FG before Eddie Murray misses again: Packers 34, ROADKILL 31 1988 Was A Banner Year: 9/18/88 At own 12 yd line, ROADKILL winning 14-12, Jim Arnold tries fake punt; sadly, no one else on team knows about it: Saints 22-14 10/30/88 QB John Witkowski fumbles on 1st play of OT; Giants instantly kick FG to win 11/13/88 ROADKILL scores go-ahead TD w/ :52 left; naturally give up losing FG to Buc's Donald Igwebuike 10/28/89 Rodney Peete throws INT on 1st play of OT, Packers instantly kick FG to win 1/8/94 Teague scores on 101 yd INT, Favre throws TD pass w/ less than a minute left in playoff: Packers 28-24 12/31/94 ROADKILL and HOFer Barry Sanders set NFL playoff record, rushing for -4 yards: Packers, 16-12 12/30/95 ROADKILL set record for losing highest-scoring playoff game to Eagles, 58-37 11/24/02 After ROADKILL gave up tying FG on last play of regulation, Coach Mornhinweg elects to kick off in OT; Bears instantly drive downfield, kick FG to win 10/2/05 Marcus Pollard scores winning TD; official review mistakenly overturns TD: Bucs, 17-13 12/11/05 Late 4th: ROADKILL can't score on 4th & 1 at goal line; next play, Packers called for 2 penalties in end zone, somehow no safety called. In OT: Packers, 16-13. 10/12/08 QB Orlovsky doesn't know where he is, runs out of end zone for safety; ROADKILL loses by 2: Vikings 12-10 |