Editor's Note: The following is a fair representation of a real court case. This should give you a clearer picture of how your mandatory auto insurance payments have been abused. Interestingly, it was not reported in the Los Angeles legal newspaper "Jury and Settlement Reports" which claims to list all judgments and settlements over $400,000.
IN THE SUPERIOR COURT OF CALIFORNIA* IN AND FOR THE COUNTY OF SANTA CLARA ERIC JOHN DIEMEL, Plaintiff, vs. Case Number 725789 ARON CLARK, Defendant.
PROBABLE OPINION OF "JUDGE" JEREMY FOGEL My name is Jeremy Fogel. I am a graduate of Stanford University and Harvard Law School. I am therefore entitled to occupy the position of judge without question. I am above the law. This case involves a rear-end collision of a car which the plaintiff Eric Diemel was driving at the time. He sustained minor, yet sufficient injuries at the time of the accident to have to go to the hospital and get checked over for the next few weeks, and possibly months. The defendant's insurance company refused at first to pay the plaintiff's demand for $15,000 damages which they believed were excessive and unreasonable. The plaintiff then sued for $15,000,000 pursuant to claims which were clearly exaggerated, irrational, justiciable, and highly suspect. Clearly, the evidence in this case would have shown that the plaintiff was a cantankerous litigant involved in about 50 personal lawsuits over the past 5 years. His business behavior during this time was nothing short of atrocious and to some extent fraudulent. Despite his alleged injuries, he continues, as prior to the accident, to administratively operate a bodyshop and car repair facility. According to competent medical sources, the injuries which he claimed could be explained as part of the normal human aging process. However, it is apparent to me that the plaintiff Diemel comes from the Los Angeles area where I come from and that he graduated from UCLA. He then attended Stanford University where I was an undergraduate. We also share a common adversary without post-secondary degrees, ever since I and my judicial staff feloniously misused our office to prevent this other person from getting on the election ballot and to obstruct his subsequent litigation. As a further reason for judicial cover-up, a number of judges and attorneys in our Santa Clara County political machine would be exposed as incompetent if the public ever found out how we failed to adequately regulate Diemel's unlawful business activities and how we corruptly prosecuted his lesser-credentialed victims. Therefore, I approve a stipulated "judgment" of $1,000,000 to the plaintiff Diemel. The money comes from the insurance companies anyway. The owner of the car that hit his has been unduly influenced to approve the stipulation, and therefore won't be a problem. Some of the insurance money goes to grease the pockets of the doctors, and some of it goes to the lawyers. The rest goes to my little brother Eric Diemel. Maybe he'll use some of it against my homeless adversary, and the money will help Eric acquire 300 acres of land in the Santa Cruz mountains. Screw the other people with worse whiplash injuries. Nobody can touch me. Date: November 1994
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