Orange Pulp Fiction
Originall written Nov.8, 2002

In no other juice will you get pulp; I've never seen pulp in apple or
grapefruit juice.  However, for some reason, it seems like orange juice is
only 20% juice and 80% pulp.  I rarely drink more than a few sips of
store-bought or restaraunt-ordered orange juice because of the proliferation
of pulp.
	This is not right.  Pulp is foul.  It takes just a fine mesh strainer
to remove the pulp from the juice, but the factories ignore this and continue
to provide us with pulpy juice.
	Something needs to be done in order to ensure that the pulp is
forever banished from orange juice.  It should be a Constitutional amendment,
and I have an idea how it should go.
	"All orange juice products shall be strained of pulp.  Any orange
juice product found containing more than 1% pulp per volume shall be returned
and strained further."
	Making it a law that pulp should be removed from orange juice might
be a little extreme, but if that's what it takes to ensure that no orange
juice drinker takes a sip and gags on a mouthful of pulp, I'll be happy.
	I like orange juice.  It's sour, but I can live with that.  Pulp,
however, it a crime against humanity.  Pulp should be considered cruel and
unusual punishment or a form of torture.
	Have you figured out by now that I can't stand orange pulp?  By now,
I've used "pulp" so often that it sounds weird.  Straining the pulp from
orange juice is so easy, that if the factories can't do it, then the people
who serve it should.  It's only a couple seconds that few people will miss,
especially if it means 99% pulp-free orange juice.
	But until the world changes and orange juice is strained of pulp
before being served, I will have to be content with drinking Sunny Delight.
Actually, now that I think about it, I think Sunny D may actually be better
for me than straight orange juice, as well as tasting sweeter and coming
pulp-free from the bottle.