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Author
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Topic: 1000 Things your Characters do if they have Deathwishes
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DFloyd
Member
Member # 21429
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posted April 07, 2003 10:28 AM
[disregard; posting error, but not a double post]
[ April 08, 2003, 03:29 PM: Message edited by: DFloyd ]
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All people are created stupid, but some are more stupid than others.
>My D&D Dungeon< hosts a slew of original and converted material, including the d20 Modern Net.Book of Fictional Characters.
Zelda d20 Status and Countdown!
From: Vancouver, BC, Canada | Registered: May 2001
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DFloyd
Member
Member # 21429
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posted April 07, 2003 10:38 AM
Please don't post anything that would make the DM want to kill you, the player.
Bad example: "Intentionally knocking the DM's Mountain Deew onto his materials."
Good example: "Blowing your nose on the tapestry of the duke's family history, in full view of the duke and his family."
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All people are created stupid, but some are more stupid than others.
>My D&D Dungeon< hosts a slew of original and converted material, including the d20 Modern Net.Book of Fictional Characters.
Zelda d20 Status and Countdown!
From: Vancouver, BC, Canada | Registered: May 2001
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Navarre
Member
Member # 108185
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posted April 07, 2003 04:30 PM
- 68) Insist the other characters run away while you stay behind to meet the BBEG.
- 69) In a very public place, relieve a very important NPC of their coin purse in a blatantly obvious manner.
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"I think the idea of art kills creativity." ~Douglas Adams
"All great truths begin as blasphemies." ~G. B. Shaw
"I don't understand how electricity works, but I do know that it calms me. Ahh...sweet, sweet current..." ~Emo Phillips
Nothing Sucks Foundation member 0000134
From: Where ever I go, there I am. | Registered: Oct 2002
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Scipio
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Member # 98055
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posted April 07, 2003 09:18 PM
70) Fight their way hundreds of miles through the countryside in order to try and assassinate the king, when the king knows they're coming and has made them the sole target of his secret police.
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Nerdicorum Rex
Non cogito nimis ergo non sim.
Goblinoid Foundation Member 00000019
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From: Hell, well ok Oklahoma. (close enough) | Registered: Jul 2002
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thaytor
Member
Member # 88886
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posted April 08, 2003 11:13 AM
71.) tickle fight with a dragon
72.) leave "calling cards" on clangeddons statue in a temple
73.) use levitate to bungee jump as a thief
74.) open doors while no one is looking
75.) orc bowling with a CN dwarf and a grease spell
76.) dwarf toss the dwarven paladin
77.) bongos on the liches head
78.) try to use the liches head for bowling
79.) try to pimp out the elven cleric ... to a dwarven barbarian
80.) become a fang of lloth while part of a party of paladins
81.) pit diving sans rope or levitate...head first
82.) spank an ancient red dragon
83.) goose same dragon
84.) press the red button
85.) volenteer to be the dwarven barbarian missle weapon ( one dwarf barbarian a catapult and cast levitate on the dwarf)
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Knowledge is Power
Power Without Wisdom Turns Evil
Visualize wirled peas
NEVER EVER try to shave a Wookie
[email protected]
From: fl | Registered: Jun 2002
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Trueman
Member
Member # 135568
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posted April 08, 2003 11:56 AM
86)Challenge a Darktentacles to a game of slaps
87)Offer to test a Deathbringer's armour
88)Ask a necromancer if he will let you see your dead grandmother, one last time.
89)Suggest that a nightmare beast should floss
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The touch of death has a chocolate centre...i've seen it
From: Bridlington, UK | Registered: Apr 2003
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Seeker95
Member
Member # 47729
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posted April 08, 2003 12:13 PM
quote:
Originally posted by Navarre:
69) In a very public place, relieve a very important NPC of their coin purse in a blatantly obvious manner. [/list]
90. In a very public place, relieve self in a blatantly obvious manner.
[ April 08, 2003, 12:15 PM: Message edited by: Seeker95 ]
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*****
There are many ways to die, and many ways to live. Focus on the latter, and let the former happen when it will. -- me
*****
From: Durham, NC | Registered: Oct 2001
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Roland_the_Red
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Member # 129742
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posted April 09, 2003 11:15 AM
91. Invite a Minotaur to a Steak Dinner.
92. Call a Minotaur male a cow.
93. Try to put the pebble with the Silence Spell cast on it into the Dragons...er...Uh...rear...so it cannot cast spells...(True Game Story)
94. Become a pacifist
95. Plane Shift to the Negative Energy Plane as your last spell...
96. Say, "I have never had a character die", within earshot of the DM.
97. Say, "I attack the darkness..."
98. Refuse Healing and only use your Viscious Weapon...hehe
99. Polymorph into a ghoul and wander around the Bazaar saying "Need Brains!"
...and I'll let someone else have 100...
From: Gainesville, Fl. | Registered: Feb 2003
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CDW22
Member
Member # 113192
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posted April 09, 2003 11:35 AM
100. "Hah, and I haven't even gotten hit yet!" ...said by a player in his first game, 1st level Fighter, Skeleton in combat goes to him and hits a crit that knocks him into negatives. Very funny since my Sorc had just gotten hit, and didn't get KOed.
Registered: Nov 2002
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Trueman
Member
Member # 135568
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posted April 09, 2003 11:56 AM
quote:
Originally posted by DFloyd:
Bad example: "Intentionally knocking the DM's Mountain Deew onto his materials."
101) Intentionally knocking your Mountain Dew onto the DM's favourate NPC
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The touch of death has a chocolate centre...i've seen it
From: Bridlington, UK | Registered: Apr 2003
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empty
Member
Member # 113575
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posted April 10, 2003 03:55 AM
102) Kill himself (the most obvious thing to do)
103) Eating jelly (what do you mean i doesnt have flesh anymore? ![[Eek!]](http://boards.wizards.com/rpg/eek.gif) )
104) Believe that a skeleton are NOT animated.
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Norske D&D spillere,
Patched Dimension: http://www.home.no/empty/patchdim/
Against-foundations-Foundation! member 001
From: Valle, Bamble, Telemark, Norway, Europe | Registered: Nov 2002
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chuck38821
Member
Member # 135957
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posted April 10, 2003 07:45 AM
64. Pick up single coins on the floor. They may flame up when touched.
From: Amory, MS | Registered: Apr 2003
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Kassey
Member
Member # 106434
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posted April 10, 2003 08:52 AM
105)Tell your kender henchmen to cover you while youre scouting the dragons lair
[ April 10, 2003, 08:53 AM: Message edited by: Kassey ]
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Kiss My Axe!
The Kender Foundation Member #1
From: Quebec | Registered: Sep 2002
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Azariel
Member
Member # 130711
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posted April 10, 2003 09:15 AM
quote:
Originally posted by DFloyd:
quote:
Originally posted by Tanuki, the Bewildered:
quote:
Originally posted by Valiantheart:
48. Insult the DMs girlfriend.
48b. Hit on the DM's girlfriend.
48c. Do something untoward to the DM's girlfriend.
48d. start a conversation with the DM's girlfriend about giving head (alas my friend did this)
From: Calgary | Registered: Mar 2003
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Trueman
Member
Member # 135568
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posted April 10, 2003 01:37 PM
106) Count the teeth of a Nethersight Mastiff
107) Declare you're a masochist in front of a sadist
108)Randomly slap someone...anyone...everyone
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The touch of death has a chocolate centre...i've seen it
From: Bridlington, UK | Registered: Apr 2003
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Sephiroth-sama
Member
Member # 135904
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posted April 10, 2003 07:15 PM
109)Use a Balor to roast marshmallows
110)Look inside a dragon's chamberpot
111)Make "yo mamma" jokes to a sorceror
112)Go for a swim in a red dragon's horde
113)See what happens if you cast Meteor Swarm on yourself
114)Bring a flamethrower with you to every gaming session. Use it whenever you cast a fireball.
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Swords are the Coolest Foundation Founder
I like swords
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High Archmage of Celestials
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Human foundation #000002
From: The Death Star | Registered: Apr 2003
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thaytor
Member
Member # 88886
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posted April 10, 2003 07:31 PM
115.) go on an adventure with a wild mage
116.) be a wildmage
117.) play a drizzit
118.) look at an ancient red wyrm and say "nyah nyah nyah dragon got big butt"
119.) go into a lich lair with just harm and inflict wound spells
120.) poly self and hide in the liches skull
121.) try to use the head of vecna
122.) go sailing in full plate
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Knowledge is Power
Power Without Wisdom Turns Evil
Visualize wirled peas
NEVER EVER try to shave a Wookie
[email protected]
From: fl | Registered: Jun 2002
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WizO_Snark
Member # 59300
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posted April 10, 2003 08:39 PM
Moved to What's a player (Not??) to Do?
Happy posting. ![[Smile]](http://boards.wizards.com/rpg/smile.gif)
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"Just the place for a Snark!" the Bellman cried,
As he landed his crew with care;
Supporting each man on the top of the tide
By a finger entwined in his hair.
"Just the place for a Snark! I have said it twice:
That alone should encourage the crew.
Just the place for a Snark! I have said it thrice:
What I tell you three times is true."
"The Hunting of the Snark: an Agony in Eight Fits" by Lewis Carroll
From: The Wabe | Registered: Jan 2002
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DarthFader18
Member
Member # 132772
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posted April 10, 2003 09:00 PM
123)Randomly pee on the leg of important NPCs.
Alas, this did actually happen.
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*******it Kyle, Jews can't Be Paladins!!!!-Southpark ep613
From: Tennessee | Registered: Mar 2003
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Zeed
Member
Member # 135073
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posted April 10, 2003 09:07 PM
Call the Orkin Man about an infestation problem in the underdark.
![[Dropjaw]](http://boards.wizards.com/rpg/graemlins/dropjaw.gif) ![[Bounce]](http://boards.wizards.com/rpg/graemlins/jump.gif)
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famous last words- "...eeeewwww poke it..."
My Prestige Class
Chaos Mage
From: well i'm here aren't I o.O'? | Registered: Apr 2003
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Azariel
Member
Member # 130711
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posted April 11, 2003 12:14 AM
quote:
Originally posted by thaytor:
115.) go on an adventure with a wild mage
116.) be a wildmage
the first is true, the second.... well i have yet to have a wild mage die... one even got to what 2e considered epic levels
From: Calgary | Registered: Mar 2003
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Mad Gnome
Member
Member # 131897
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posted April 11, 2003 12:40 AM
117.) Walk into a bar and attempt to intimidate a bugbear/fighter and roll a nat 20 when your only at level 3. Actually happend and he dies horribly
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The Dm is NOT always right! Sometimes he's left :)
Registered: Mar 2003
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Shadowfury
Member
Member # 127458
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posted April 11, 2003 01:16 AM
118) Use the phrase "Il handle this" as much as possable and always follow through
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ITS HAMMER TIME
From: Melbourne | Registered: Feb 2003
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jruball
Member
Member # 125352
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posted April 11, 2003 07:55 AM
128) Tell your friend the lich that you are extremely clusmy and often trip and break things... while standing next to his phylactery.
129) Try to cast charm person on a shopkeeper in a crowded marketplace.
130) Eat or drink something that is "on the house" or that the pretty lady at the bar bought for you... when you have a 6 charisma.
131) Tell the barbarian he is cute when he gets angry.
132) Go on a mirror breaking spree, your DM will find a way to give you really bad luck.
Edited to correct numbers.
[ April 11, 2003, 07:57 AM: Message edited by: jruball ]
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Unless we drink ourselves to death, we will die unavenged...
-Horace
I've always been lucky killin' folks.
-Clint Eastwood (Unforgiven)
From: Ohio | Registered: Feb 2003
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