16^th February 2008 

Alderbury  2  Barton Stacey  1 

Top of the table Alderbury: unbeaten throughout this season, and unbeaten at home for all of last season. For an U13 footballer, the game at Alderbury anticipated as he would the annual visit to a bearded bad-tempered Aunt and her flatulent dog; a day to be endured rather than enjoyed.  In previous seasons Barton’s woes at Alderbury have featured swathes of edible mushrooms across the pitch, a chippy ref who warmed up for the match by jabbing his finger at a local resident in the car park, many eccentric refereeing decisions and a physicality of play, which for brief periods, flattened Barton Stacey. What would today bring?

Well to start with an early arrival! Mrs de Cani in the navigator’s seat for this one. Three times she shouted down the braying Tom Tom, refusing to turn around when it was safe to do so, and ploughing on through the wilds of Wiltshire to reach Alderbury in record time.

The half hours “getting lost time” factored into the hour of departure, usefully employed on the Alderbury climbing frame and slides, rather than with technical dead ball situations and game-plans on a blackboard.

In bright sunshine Barton Stacey kicked of the match and spent much of the first half under the cosh. Alderbury laid siege to the Barton goal, creating many chances, and finally taking the lead through Finn Drury.  Barton hit back on the break, Barton’s very own “Mad eye Moody” William de Cani, hit by a cricket ball earlier in the week, finding space as both sides avoided the strange Shubunkin running up and down the right. 

A goal behind at half time, Barton had been on the back foot for much of the first half.

Battered and bruised from the Alderbury onslaught Barton returned to the action, and in a closely fought second half came close to taking the points. Midway though the half Harry Lawton fed Michael Taplin, who took a touch to control the ball and hit a superb instinctive strike from the edge of the box to score one of his best goals of the season and equalise for Barton Stacey.  Alderbury were rocked and for a brief period Barton Stacey threatened to take the points, Harry Pereira, Luke Bacon, Sam Hadlington James Brooke and Sam Burrows worked their socks off in midfield, Dan Pomroy and Danny Tuson defended superbly, while Captain Coetzee and Harry Lawton were nothing short of magnificent, Super-sub Charles Sherwood came off the bench and nearly scored with his first touch, keeper Ollie Richards regularly called into action in his busiest game for weeks, and then something happened of which we had been forewarned.  Strange things occur in the Alderbury Triangle, not quite flashing lights or disappearing ships but definitely a gap in the time-space continuum. Barton Stacey’s “Derek Acora approved spook-proof clock”showed eight minutes remaining, the ref announcing at least thirteen to go.  Shortly afterwards Alderbury scored a scrambled winner the ref following up with the final whistle a few minutes later, William de Cani’s magical eye rolling in its socket at the apparent foreshortening of the game.

Three points to Alderbury, who won the game with their dominant first half performance, a battered and bruised Barton Stacey grateful for the generous offer of doughnuts from their hosts and likely league champions.