| I saw this brunette across the room. She had pigtails and is wearing her hat down low to try and hide the liquid pools of light that her eyes are, but I can see them. Her eyes fill up the room, and fill her boyfriends eyes too. Not with love, he isn�t looking with love, he is looking with lust, but I am too. She is hot, and she has a beautiful figure. She passes all to close to me, and I can smell the sent that she is wearing, it smells like burnt roses. Up close I could see her dark red voluptuous lips moist with lipstick, waiting for and embrace� waiting for someone other than me. I look at her and she sees my eyes watching her, and her boyfriend sees them too, he pulls her closer. I look away. They dance like there is no one else watching, but I am watching. I�m sure all eyes in the room are drawn to her beauty. I want her, but I realize that I won�t ever have her, so again I look away, and then I walk away, never to see her liquid pools of life again. 02/03/2001 01:14:12 AM |
| I lay in bed each night and pray to god. I pray that I won�t wake up another morning alone, and empty. Each morning I wake up with these unanswered prayers ring in my head. Requiems to the empty funerals of my day. Each day another funeral, each our another dirge, each minute another empty requiem, onward each night to the death of sleep. 02-04-2001 09:23 |
| Alone is pain. Alone is solitude. Alone is tearing and ripping the self apart. Alone is putting yourself back together. 02-07-2001 21:45 |
| I want someone to understand how much I love them and then accept it, without telling me that it�s stupid, or telling me that I am stupid for feeling that way, or run away from me, or stop talking to me... or a thousand other reasons but then I have a hard time telling people what I feel because I don�t want them to say any of those things, so I usually say nothing. 02/28/01 03:52:34 AM |
| I wish the truth was as easy as lying so I could just tell her what I think on some random Friday night when I am good and sober and she will probably be good and drunk... That would make me feel a little better. It won�t make me feel loved, or the happiness that I felt when I loved her, but it will feel in a way vindicated. But then I guess vindication isn�t that great of a thing because it will just widen that gap and force me to give her another chance cause it would be my fault cause I pushed her away... Starting things back to where I tried to leave them in the first place. 02/28/01 04:05:05 AM |