| Ever needed a new pair of tights but not sure which were the best ones to buy? You're not alone! And that's why, as the world's favourite tight-wearing elf, I've written this guide for you. Unfortunately ladies they are all male tights (obviously!) but I'm sure you're all intelligent enough to not need a guide anyway! |
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| Ok now this guy just has no style! Ignoring the outfit, those tights are just awful! I mean how can you expect to show off to the ladies in tights that don't show off your assets? |
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| Well, I wouldn't wear these personally but they're still better than that other bloke's! Unfortunately they don't leave much to the imagination but at least the colour solves that a little! |
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| MESSAGE TO MR BLOOM: No offence meant! I realise we're taking the piss but hey like Mr Grohl you're one of the coolest people on the planet! Plus you're the cutest guy in tights I've ever seen ;) |
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| Hmm well, I don't doubt they're very practical sports-wise but well... they're not very flattering are they? They get an OK score though because, though unattractive, they are useful. |
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| Aha! Finally a classy pair of tights on that rather handsome chap in the centre! That bloke next to him obviously has some taste in tights unfortunately the one nearest blatantly is no tights-wearer. But nevermind... the blonde-haired guy (ooh how lovely I look! No wonder all the ladies love me! :D) now HE is clearly the only person qualified to discuss such an important matter... which is why I got the job. Hehe, full marks for those tights!! |
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| The original tights man! If it wasn't for this guy Legolas would be wearing trousers (or at best: leggings) and this wonderful guide to tights would not exist! But the tights on this particular statue aren't the best I've seen. Ok for the tights but the guy's a hero! |
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