A Thousand Years
A GW songfic by Lynne
(3x4 shonen ai, deathfic)
Song by Sting

A thousand years, a thousand moreA thousand times a million doors to eternity I may have lived a thousand lives, a thousand times
An endless turning stairway climbs
To a tower of souls
If it takes another thousand years, a thousand wars,
The towers rise to numberless floors in space
I could shed another million tears, a million breaths
A million names, but only one truth to face

[Trowa Barton sighed. Was it really so hard...how many past lives had he led? Thousands, he was sure. Naze? What was the reason behind his living all over again? It could take another thousand years, but there was one truth to face, that was the reason he lived so many times. But what was it?]

A million roads, a million fears
A million suns, ten million years of uncertainty
I could speak a million lies, a million songs,
A million rights, a million wrongs in this balance of time
But if there was a single truth, a single light
A single thought, a singular touch of grace
Then following this single point, this single flame
This single haunted memory of your face

[Trowa nodded slowly, a sudden memory coming to him, Quatre's face, and the last time he had seen him. The sunlight glowed on his golden hair, forming a halo of gold around his face, accentuating his delicate beauty...but the expression on his face was that of sadness, not joy. Also, he seemed a little too fragile lately, but when asked, he wouldn't say a word.

" Trowa...I know you'll never be able to accept this or return anything...but Aishiteru." Then the blond had turned and run away before he could stop him.

Now I understand, Sou Ka. Trowa thought. Arigato, dear little one.]I still love youI still want you A thousand times the mysteries unfold themselvesLike galaxies in my head

[ Trowa leaned his head on the table. Quatre...why did you have to run away from me? Couldn't your uchuu no kokoro tell you the truth? You are the reason I've lived so many times...because in each of my past lives I couldn't tell you that I loved you, and every time, something's happened and you weren't alive anymore so I could tell you. Always, your past selves have died untimely deaths at a young age...and I couldn't ever tell you. But...I still love you. Always. I still want you, and always...something's happened to you. Now, I know why. And I will tell you...before anything happens. I have such a bad feeling...that you aren't well....I wish for you on a falling star, wondering where you are...]

I may be numberless, I may be innocent
I may know many things, I may be ignorant
Or I could ride with kings and conquer many lands
Or win this world at cards and let it slip my hands
I could be cannon food, destroyed a thousand times
Reborn as fortune's child to judge another's crimes
Or wear this pilgrim's cloak , or be a common thief
I've kept this single faith, I've had but one belief

[Several months have gone by. One day, Trowa was out walking in the woods, when he saw a snippet of bright cloth. Puzzled, he went deeper into the woods-and saw a slender figure lying in the grass, and he saw a flash of gold-Quatre! Trowa ran to the blond's side, and helped him to sit up. Quatre coughed and coughed, and couldn't stop.

" Gomen nasai, Trowa..." Quatre's voice was as soft as the least breeze. " I didn't tell you or any of the others...only Iria, Mandy, and Roselyn know-but they're my sisters, they had to know...I've had consumption for the longest time, since two years ago...and there is no cure in my case. I'm going to die...and soon. I don't think I can hold on any longer...that's why I ran away after I told you I loved you...I couldn't put you through the agony of seeing me fade away day by day until I die..."

" Oh, Quatre..." Trowa cradled the ethereal form of the little Arabian...Quatre felt like a spun glass figurine in his arms.

" Are you...are you angry with me?" Quatre asked, tears running down his pale cheeks.

" Iie...Doushite?" Trowa said. " Even though you ran away and deceived us all about your health...Aishiteru, tenshi, Itmasudemo, Doshitemo."

" Honto ni?" Quatre asked.

" Honto ni." Trowa affirmed, and pulled the little blond close for a sweet kiss...and tears from Quatre's downturned, clear aquamarine eyes flowed into Trowa's green ones.

" I wish...I wish I could have more time." Quatre said several minutes later, looking up into the moonlit sky. " Love...love is always a risk, especially now. I'm not afraid to die, Trowa, but...I don't want to leave you behind."

" You taught me to live again...we'll meet again, someday." Trowa said. "In different lives we've met...and before I could tell you I loved you, your past self would die...we'll meet again, in another lifetime." Quatre nodded, and his large aquamarine eyes were serene in the pale, beautiful face that was so fragile. Coughs racked his overly slender body, and he shook...

"Do you see the end, little tenshi?" Trowa asked.

" Hai...it's so beautiful...only, it's without you..." Quatre's lovely aquamarine eyes disengaged from Trowa's inquiring emerald gaze and closed forever-he was gone.. Quatre was gone, and all Trowa held in his arms was the empty shell at rest that had once been Quatre Raberba Winner...

[One truth... one belief...one love...my love...my only love...my true love...my lost love...Trowa thought...]I still love youI still want you
A thousand times these mysteries unfold themselves
Like galaxies in my head On and on the mysteries unfold themselves
Eternities still unsaid
'Till you love me

[The year: After Colony 600, and humans have gone on to colonize different star systems beyond our own solar system...and among the younger set of these colonists is one Trowa Esperanza, a 17-year old Spanish teen and excellent acrobat and flutist who almost never talks or smiles and he thinks that he has no reason to...he always feels that something is missing from his life...

Enter Quatre Lightstar, another young colonist, with 6 older sisters...the 15-year old Arabian has exceptionally strong psionic powers and also plays the violin and piano extremely well, and is a gentle soul, easy to laugh and easy to cry...but he too feels that something is missing from his life...

Trowa went running down the street, not looking where he was going, and the Spanish teen knocked over someone else.

" Gomen nasai." Trowa said without looking at the person. A dulcet, bubbly laugh startled him.

" That's OK...most people don't even apologize. I'm not mad. It's not like you intentionally tried running into me." The other person got to his or her feet, and turned to face Trowa. Long-lashed, incredibly aquamarine eyes stared up into his forest green eyes.

" What do you mean?" Trowa asked, curious despite himself. I know those eyes...wait, what do I mean? I don't know anyone with that color eyes...do I?

" It's happened many times already...someone knocks me over on purpose, and 'help me up'. Their arm is usually around my waist...where it doesn't belong." The sweet, soprano voice said. For the first time, Trowa saw the person...a small, slender blond boy with beautiful features and equally lovely eyes.

No wonder their arm is around his waist after they knock him down...Trowa thought, looking at the other boy. He's got the size waist a girl would envy, and shapely hips...heck, if they dared, those people would probably try to put their arm around his hips. As if reading his thoughts, the little blond smiled, an expression that lighted up his beautiful face and made it radiant, like an angel's face.

" You don't know my name..." The boy extended his hand, and Trowa took it hesitantly. " My name is Quatre Lightstar." Trowa's one visible eye widened. The psychic? The Latin teen thought. " Yes...that's the reason they don't try anything too funny...if you count putting their arm around my waist funny." Quatre smiled. " You are Trowa Esperanza, right?"

" How..." Trowa managed to say before he mentally kicked himself. Duh, he's psychic...

FLASH!

Quatre had a vision of another time and place...a moonlit night...and he was with another version of Trowa Esperanza...a past lifetime... His past self was cradled in the arms of Trowa's past self, looking pale and weak... I was dying in that moment...he realized.

" Do you see the end, little tenshi?"

" Hai...and it's so beautiful, only it's without you..."

{END FLASHBACK}

Quatre snapped back into himself, only to find Trowa staring at him.

" What happened to you?" Trowa asked. Quatre didn't say anything for a moment, and when he did, it wasn't in response to Trowa's question. The aquamarine eyes were serene in the pale, pretty face.

" Do you remember me?" Quatre asked. Trowa stared at him for a moment, realizing what he meant.

" Hai, little one...it's been so long..." Trowa realized that he had found what he had been searching for...that he was complete now that he had found his angel at last...

FLASH!

Trowa had a vision of another time and place...the same moonlit night that Quatre had seen in his flashback...

" I wish...I wish I could have more time." Quatre's past self said. several minutes later, looking up into the moonlit sky. " Love...love is always a risk, especially now. I'm not afraid to die, Trowa, but...I don't want to leave you behind."

" You taught me to live again...we'll meet again, someday." His past self said. "In different lives we've met...and before I could tell you I loved you, your past self would die...we'll meet again, in another lifetime." Quatre nodded, and his large aquamarine eyes were serene in the pale, beautiful face that was so fragile. Coughs racked his overly slender body, and he shook...

{END FLASHBACK}

Trowa pulled the little blond closer, his arm encircling the Arabian's slim, supple waist, and Quatre didn't protest at all, and it seemed natural that way... their lips met in a sweet, passionate kiss that closed the doors to the unhappy past and opened doors to a new, wonderful future for them together...the eternal rhapsody that had begun all those thousands of years ago was finally over...

Trowa thought, and this thought the psychic Arabian easily picked up.

This thought Quatre kythed to the other boy... The eternities still unsaid were finally spoken after all those years...and there was a chance for a happy life together...and all the unhappiness that Trowa's past lives had had to live through after Quatre's past lives had all died was taken away, and only the good was left, shining through... and they would finally be together, like they were always meant to be...

~Owari~

Sweet and sappy, huh? Oh yes- "Desert Rose", the hopefully-sequel (songfic, duh!!) to this (it may be something totally different, my muse doesn't know...{kicks her muse}) should be up soon. Well, Ja Ne minna-san, for now!