Trowa jumped up off the hospital bed. Or rather, he tried to, but his concussion, combined with the sedative made him woozy. So he more or less tumbled off the bed, and into the doctor's arms. He tried to straighten himself with as much dignity as he could muster.

"What do you mean he's missing?"

Trowa winced at the weakness, and fear in his voice. He clutched his head, and willed himself to control the pounding. He closed his eyes, and took a few breaths to try and control the way the room was tilting. Everything was spinning out of control. Quatre was gone? He couldn't be. He was asleep in his room. The doctor was mistaken.

"He wasn't even awake. He couldn't have wandered off..."

No..he couldn't have wandered off. Even if he had woken up, he would have been to weak to move, let alone leave. The doctor didn't know what he was talking about. Trowa just had to go to Quatre's room, and he would find the blonde safe in his bed. He stumbled into the hallway, and leaned against the wall. The dizziness was overpowering.

Slowly, with wall as support, he shuffled toward the room that held his beloved. He heard the doctor's footsteps behind him, and he gritted his teeth in anger as the man spoke.

"Do you need help?"

"No," he spat out, "I'm fine."

He knees shook as he spoke, and he was forced to stop, and lean on the wall. The doctor hovered around him like an annoying bee. Trowa wished he could swat him away. He braced himself, and moved along the wall to Quatre's room. That was his sole focus, and it took all his concentration.

One foot in front of the other, slowly, slowly walking down the hall. After what seemed like years, he made it to Quatre's room. The doctor lingered behind him, as Trowa clutched the door frame, and slid inside. There was Quatre's bed. Empty. Everything began to swirl around him. He saw the bed, covers neatly turned back, various tubes that should be in Quatre, placed on the sheets. Machines that should be beeping erratically, were silent.

He looked up to see Heero sitting in his bed. Trowa asked a thousand silent questions with his eyes. Heero shook his head, unable to answer any of them. His blue eyes were dark with worry. Trowa's world spun madly, before the welcome blackness engulfed him.

* * *

Trowa awoke again, and was surprised to find himself in a bed. For a few heart pounding seconds, he couldn't recall where he was. He shot up, and quickly scanned the room. Sterile, white, depressingly bleak. Another hospital room. Although, thankfully they hadn't gone so far as to put him in one of those gowns. He was still fully dressed, right down to his shoes. He reached his hand up to rub his eyes, and looked in wonder at the tube running from it.

"IV, Doctors said you haven't been eating, that with the shock, not to mention the concussion, made you pass out."

Trowa looked over to see Heero leaning in the doorway. The Japanese boy walked over, and dragged a chair to the side of the bed.

"You have to take better care of yourself. How can you help Quatre if you're bedridden?"

At the mention of the blonde's name, Trowa's eyes went wide with hope.

"S-So they found him...?"

Heero's eyes flickered with pain for the briefest instant, before returning to their normal, icy state. He looked down, refusing to met Trowa's expectant eyes.

//Was that how I looked when I asked about Duo? All optimistic, and filled with hope? How did Trowa ever find the courage to tell me...How will I find the courage to tell him...//

Trowa sat waiting, each second of Heero's silence ticking by in agony. Heero took a deep breath, and looked up, to tell Trowa what had happened...But his throat closed, and he couldn't form the words.

//You can do this Yuy, tell him. It's not the worst news...Trowa, your love disappeared in the middle of the night. Since there was no way he could walk on his own, that means someone abducted him. The hospital knows nothing, saw nothing. So we have no way of finding him...that's great Yuy, why not mention that the person who took him is probably the same one who put him here? You can kill Barton in one fell swoop.//

Heero sighed. Trowa would have to know the truth eventually. He looked up into Trowa's trusting green orbs.

//Just be honest, he's a Gundam pilot, he can handle it. ...Like you did?//

"Trowa," Heero paused. The eyes were killing him. The way they begged for good news.

"Quatre...He couldn't have...so that means...and..", the green eyes began to fade as the hope drained from them, "they haven't found him yet. But they're looking still. He's around here somewhere."

//Coward! Why didn't you tell him? ...Because I don't want him to have to feel what I've felt. No one deserves that. No one.//

Trowa looked anxiously at Heero.

"Do they have any idea where he could have gone? He couldn't just have wandered off..."

Heero shifted nervously.

"No...they have no leads. He just...he's..gone."

Heero looked down at the bedspread and saw that the tall boy's hand were gripping it. His knuckles were white from the force.

"I keep doing it Heero."

Heero stared at him, confused.

"Keep doing what?"

"L-Leaving him...and he keeps...I s-said I would be there, and I wasn't. Again. I'm never there. Never. When he n-needs me I abandon him."

Trowa's body started to shake. He was trying to hold back the tears that wanted to fall. It seemed like that was all he did lately.

//When did I get so emotional? I'm a soldier. I fight. That's it. I'm nothing more than a pawn of war. So why, now, do I have these feelings? ...Because now..you have a heart, and it's kept by a small blonde boy. An angel that means more to you, than yourself. And everytime you leave him, you leave your heart there, and it hurts.//

"Please Heero," he whispered, "I need to be alone for a while."

"Trowa..we need to get help..."

"I know," the banged boy said through clenched teeth, "but I can't right now. Please..."

Heero nodded, understanding his friend's need for privacy. He looked back once he reached the door. Trowa's head was bowed, his lanky frame trembling.

"I'll..I'll start without you. When you feel up to it, I'll be in our..my room."

Trowa nodded, and Heero took that as his cue to leave. As he was shutting the door, he heard a faint, whispered apology.

* * *

About an hour and a half later, Trowa made his way down the hallway to Qua..Heero's room. He angrily tugged the IV stand behind him. He had stared at the blasted thing for twenty minutes, debating on whether or not, to call a nurse, or just remove the stupid thing himself. He decided that his hands were a little too shaky to pull it out, so he reluctantly called for help. The way too cheery nurse had told him that she couldn't remove it, and neither could he, doctor's orders.

He glared first at the smiling lady, and then at the now loathed machine. Then he slid out of bed, and pushed by her with as much dignity as one attached to an IV stand could muster. He jerked the stand down the hallway, looking back every so often to shoot hate filled glares at it. As if the inanimate metal rack was the source of all his problems. It felt good though. To focus on something rather than his fear. He knew it was childish to hate the IV rack, but anything was better than thinking of Quatre. His eyes were still puffy and red from crying, and his whole body felt drained. It was as if being without the blonde was sucking the life from him. The constant worry, and unknowing were wearing him down. With a particularly vicious tug to the rack he made it to Heero's room.

He stood outside the door, and composed himself. He had already made a fool of himself twice today. He needed to be strong. To be strong for Quatre. This crying, and acting like a love sick idiot wasn't doing anything to help his love. He needed to get it together. Trowa took a deep breath and walked into the room. He was surprised to see that Heero wasn't alone. A large, burly figure turned around at his entrance.

"Master Trowa."

Trowa blindly struggled for the man's name. They had met once before..at the same time him and Quatre had met. And even though this man had been around since then, fighting with them, they had never really talked. But, Quatre had spoken of him...

"Rashid," he nodded.

The larger man nodded once, and helped him into the room, settling him into an empty chair. Trowa looked up at him curiously. Rashid walked over to the bedside table, and touched the dead gladiolas.

"Did you get these for Master Quatre?", he asked, looking at Trowa. Trowa shook his head.

"No, they're from Iria, she was here when Quatre was first brought in."

A worried look crossed Rashid's features. Heero caught it, and moved next to the large man.

"What? Rashid what is it?"

Rashid shook his head.

"Maybe..maybe nothing...just that Master Quatre is allergic to these. I believe that everyone in his family is."

Trowa looked stunned.

"Well..then why would she send them..."

"She wouldn't," Heero finished, " the question is...who did..?"

They all sat in silent contemplation, each wondering who had sent these flowers, and what their ulterior motive was. Trowa broke the silence. He looked pointedly at Rashid.

"Don't think that I'm not grateful, but how are you here? How did you know...?"

Rashid ran a meaty hand through his hair.

"Master Quatre's sister sent us word that Master Quatre was in trouble. I would have been here much sooner, but the message was delayed, and then it wasn't secure so we had to check it. Finally we were able to verify it, and I jumped on the fastest shuttle I could find. Heero has been filling me in on the details. I'm worried to say that there are very few."

Trowa nodded, and looked downcast. Rashid and Heero exchanged a glance, and with that, the older man was made aware of just how deep the banged boy's feeling ran on the situation.

"Master Trowa...you and I should sit down later. There are a few things we need to discuss."

Trowa looked up at him, with clear confusion written on his face.

//What could he possibly want to talk about...? And why just me...? He probably wants to get me alone, so he can murder me without witnesses. I'm sure Heero told him everything, and now he too blames me for all of this. And why shouldn't he?//

Trowa nodded his consent. Rashid smiled warmly at him, which further confused him. He didn't have time to dwell though, as Heero began talking. The Japanese boy had reverted to his perfect soldier facade, and was treating this as a top priority mission.

"Ok, here are the details. Subject disappeared in the middle of the night. Since he was non responsive, we must conclude that he didn't leave the premises on his own. The staff saw nothing, cameras were down, and those on duty were taken out. So far, no ransom demands so we must assume this was not a kidnapping for money. This leads to the conclusion that the subject was taken by someone intent on doing him harm."

Trowa made a small whimper in the back of his throat, and didn't even realize that he had done it, until the other two looked at him. He could see concern in their eyes, and he was angered at his patheticness. He sat up, and tried his best to look aloof and unaffected. He failed miserably, and Heero continued.

"We have called in 05. He is not in the area, but was certain he could be here tonight. We will reconvene when he gets here, and form a plan to find the subject."

With that Heero looked up, and was obviously done. Rashid nodded, and Trowa followed suit. Then Heero surprised him by getting and leaving, and closing the door behind him. Rashid pulled up the extra chair, and sat across from Trowa.

"Master Trowa..."

"Please..please, just Trowa."

"Fine then, Trowa. Master Quatre is like a son to me. When he left his home, he was so uncertain of his future. He's never been sure if he was taking the right path. All the killing, the violence, the senseless death, he could never reconcile to himself that it was right. For a long time he sort of drifted. We traveled together, and I took him under my wing. I grew closer to him than perhaps his own father, because I never judged him. And because of that he came to me, and I became his sort of confidant."

Trowa nodded, not really understanding where this was going.

"What I mean is that Master Quatre came to me about certain things, told me things."

"I don't understand what it is you're trying to say," Trowa stated.

"Heero told me how you've been reacting to all this. That you're blaming yourself. And I'm here to tell you that that needs to stop. Master Quatre would never hold you responsible for this."

Trowa looked down at his lap.

"But I am responsible," he whispered.

Two strong hands grabbed his shoulders, and shook him lightly. He looked up to find Rashid frowning at him.

"Master Quatre spoke so highly of you. I think he loved you from that first day. And I thought that anyone who would be so highly praised by him would surely think the same of Quatre."

Trowa stared, his eyes wide. //Quatre spoke of me? He praised me...thought highly of me...me? He l-loved me..? All this time...?// And the last part of what Rashid had said sunk in.

"I do..I do think highly of him!", Trowa sputtered angrily, "I think more of him than I do of myself!"

He shut his mouth when he realized how much he had just revealed. Rashid patted his shoulder.

"Then do you think that Master Quatre would want you to blame yourself for all this?"

Trowa numbly shook his head. //No, Quatre wouldn't want me to feel like this. But I can't help it.// Rashid sighed and shook his head, as if he could read Trowa's mind.

"He needs you to be strong for him right now. To stop tormenting yourself, and find him."

Trowa finally let his emotions get the best of him. "You couldn't understand. What's it's like to have him as the center of your universe. What's it's like to feel like he's the only reason worth living. What it's like to love him, and then come back and find him like that," he choked but kept going, "and to know that if you hadn't left him, that it never would have happened. That if you had been stronger you could have saved him, stopped that from ever happening to him"

Rashid's eyes filled with pain.

"You're right. I could never know what it's like to love Master Quatre. To have my day brightened by his mere smile. To lose touch with him, and then get a message saying he's lying almost dead in some hospital. And to wonder if I had stayed with him, could I have prevented that. I could never fathom what that must feel like."

Trowa's misty eyes were contrite as he looked upon the older man. He had never even seen it that way. Never thought that maybe Rashid was suffering as he was. "We..we have to be strong," Trowa whispered, "for Quatre."

Rashid smiled through his sadness.

"Master Quatre was right about you after all." And then the burly man excused himself, and Trowa was again alone. With only the silence as his companion. He got up and walked over to Quatre's bed, pulling the stand behind him. He pushed all the tubes to the floor, and climbed into it. The green eyed boy snuggled his face into the pillow that still held some of Quatre's scent. Tired, and empty beyond anything he'd ever know, he curled up, and fell asleep. He was lulled into dreams by the faint fragrance of his lost loved one.

* * *

Trowa was awakened by a nurse who was trying to discreetly change his IV bag. He sat up, and rubbed his eyes. It was dark outside, he had slept away most of the day. But for once he actually felt refreshed. He had slept without the plaguing nightmares, without fear, or worry. The nurse patted his arm.

"Your friends are in the cafeteria. They said if you got up you should meet them there. They didn't want to wake you just yet, though."

Trowa eased himself out of the bed, and stretched. If the nurse thought it weird that he had been sleeping in the missing boy's bed, she wisely kept that thought to herself. Trowa wandered out into the hallway, and was surprised to see the trio headed towards him. He moved back into the room, and settled himself on Quatre's bed. The three entered all looking somber. Heero perched on the edge of his own bed, and Wufei and Rashid took the chairs. Wufei nodded to Trowa, who returned the greeting with a similar nod of the head. Heero cleared his throat, and the nurse took that as her sign to exit, quietly closing the door behind her.

"Now, we all know why we're here. So let's get down to business. Quatre is gone, and there is no way he could have accomplished that on his own. We have to figure out who could have wanted to take him, and why," he turned to Trowa, "while you were sleeping I filled Wufei in on all the details." Trowa nodded. Wufei stood up, and went to look out the window. He could see the spot where he used to hide at night. He suppressed the urge to smirk. He turned back to the others, a serious expression on his face.

"Do you think maybe it could have been OZ, or one of the factions?" Heero frowned. "I don't think so. How would they have known where we were? And why just Quatre? Trowa and I were both sedated last night. They could have easily taken us as well, but they didn't. Just him. I think whoever did this was only looking to get Quatre."

Trowa tried his best to ignore the tightening in his chest, as his heart constricted //What could my Quatre have ever done to someone to make them go this far? This is extreme, to steal a half dead unconscious boy from his hospital bed....// Trowa shivered. Whatever the kidnapper's plans were, he knew they weren't good. //We have to find you in time Quatre, we just have to.// Wufei was stalking around the room, looking like a caged beast.

"We aren't doing any good sitting here. We should go out and look for him."

//Too close..they're getting too close...Damn you Yuy, you always ruin everything. Well, you won't interfere this time. You won't get Quatre. He's mine now.// Heero shook his head.

"No, we need a plan. Quatre's still severely injured, so they couldn't have gone too far. I think they're still in the immediate area."

Wufei was getting nervous. Heero was a little too insightful, he had to try and get control of the situation back.

"You may be correct, Yuy. I will volunteer to check out the hotels in this area. If he's still here, I will find him."

//Because I know right where to look...//

Heero looked thoughtful for a minute, and then nodded. "Yes, that sounds acceptable. Report back, if you find *anything*", Heero turned to Rashid, "we'll go to the security room, and look through all the additional footage. There may be something we missed." He turned to Trowa.

"Trowa, you're still not well enough to leave. Take Rashid's laptop and go through Quatre's email the last couple of months. See if you can find anything suspicious." They all nodded, and wished the others good luck. Rashid headed out to find someone to grant him access to the security room, Heero was right behind him.. As soon as the Japanese boy left Wufei walked over to Trowa. He placed his hand over the taller boy's.

"Trowa. I know what Quatre meant to you. I'm...sorry."

Trowa tentatively smiled at him. Wufei caressed the hand under his, in what looked to be a soothing gesture. Actually he was enjoying the way the green eyed boy's skin felt under his fingers. //You should thank me Trowa. These feelings you have will only make you weak. They *have* made you weak. Look how pathetic you are. A year ago you would have removed my hand. A year ago, none of this would have bothered you. But now look at you. Mourning for the life of a lover you never had. That you never will have. But after this you'll be stronger. I'll help you. I'll make you strong, just like me.//

Trowa pulled his hand back, uncomfortable with the way Wufei was stroking it. He chastised himself. //Wufei was just trying to help. What's wrong with you?// Wufei moved to the table and stroked the flowers instead.

"Did you know that gladiolas were Quatre's favorites?", he asked Trowa. The banged boy's blood ran cold. He paled at the statement.

"I..I did not know that. How do you?"

Wufei smiled. //His sister told me. She's such a good girl.//

"Quatre told me once. Said his house was always full of them." Trowa nodded, his face expressionless. //He's lying. But why? Is he just trying to take my mind off things, trying to console me? ..Maybe...//

Wufei patted Trowa's shoulder, and took his leave. He was walking down the hallway when Rashid clamped a large hand down on his shoulder. The black haired boy looked at him, surprised.

"Heero told me that you've been covering the missions for them while they've been taking care of Master Quatre. That took a lot of strength. Please keep that power up until we find him. He needs us to be strong right now. We can't have any weak links."

Wufei swallowed and nodded. He made it to the parking lot before the tears of rage hit.

<< "I don't want to marry her father," Wufei stated simply. The larger man glared down on him, and gripped one small shoulder.

"What?", he snarled.

Wufei gulped, but stood proud.

"I said, I don't want to marry her," he repeated, hating how his voice shook, "I want to study, to be a scholar."

A loud crack echoed through the room. Wufei lay stunned on the ground, as his father advanced on him.

"You dare to defy me? You think you're stronger than me? You always were the weak link in this family."

A fist connected with his ribs,

"But don't worry. Daddy will make you strong Wufei. Daddy will make you strong." >>

Back in the hospital room, Trowa sat unseeing. //Why did he say that? Rashid would know if Quatre was allergic to something, he'd know more than we would...but why would Wufei say it if he didn't think it was true? Did he think it would make me feel better? Make me think positive thoughts about Quatre?//

Without even noticing it, the green eyed boy slid off the bed, and pulled the IV needle from his hand. He slipped out the room, and followed the same route as Wufei. He had no idea where the Chinese boy was headed, but he walked into the town, hoping to spot him. Wufei had a slight lead on him, and therefore an advantage, but if anyone could stalk prey it was Trowa. He kept to the shadows, walking close to the buildings, trying to blend in with the night. He passed seedy nightclubs, that were spilling equally seedy people onto the sidewalk.

He got a few catcalls, and a few propositions, but he ignored all of them. He was focused solely on finding Wufei. And finally he spotted him. The Chinese boy was standing on a corner, under a half burnt out neon sign. The flickering brightness cast an eerie light on Wufei, making him look surreal. But it was when Trowa saw who he was talking to, that his heart stopped.

//Q-Quatre...?//

He stepped into the darkness of an alley, and peered around. The black haired boy was talking to another boy who looked just like his Arabian. But under closer inspection Trowa could see the difference. He sighed in relief. The other boy was thinner than Quatre, and his hair was darker. He looked to be high on something as well. The boy nodded at something Wufei said, and the two walked off.

Trowa waited for a few seconds, and followed behind them. They walked a couple of blocks to a run down motel. The building was so decrepit, it looked like it should have been condemned years ago. The pair went inside, and after waiting what he thought was long enough, Trowa sprinted across the street, and inside as well. The nightclerk was asleep, snoring behind the desk.

Trowa crept past him, and towards the elevator. The archaic contraption was squeaking, and groaning, but it was moving upwards. Trowa watched the floor numbers ding off, until it reached five. He moved to the stairwell, and took the steps two at a time, not even breaking a sweat as he reached the fifth floor. He listened at the door, and not hearing much, he cautiously pushed it open. Wufei was at the other end of the hall, the strange boy behind him, as he opened the door to his room.

Trowa stayed hidden in the stairwell, until the door to Wufei's room was shut, then he snuck into the hallway. The first thing that hit him was the smell. The cloying odor made him nauseous, and his empty stomach turned. He stifled the urge to be sick, as he tiptoed down to the room. He could hear odd sounds coming from some of the other occupied rooms.

Moaning, and crying, what sounded like someone being hit. He felt ill again, but now it was because of what he knew must be going on inside this place. Young, starving boys, just needing enough for a meal, or a drug fix, selling what only assets they had. He reached the room, and stood motionless outside the door. He didn't know what to do.

He heard a loud thump from inside, and instinctively he knew that Wufei had hit the boy. A wave of sickness washed over him. He ran blindly back down the hallway, stumbling into the stairwell. He clutched the railing, and dry heaved until his body couldn't take it anymore. Then he collapsed onto the stairs, his thin frame shaking.

//Wufei...why..? He's supposed to be looking for Quatre, and instead he finds that boy, and brings him here? A boy that just so happens to look almost exactly like Quatre? Can..can that be a coincidence? And..and then..then he hit him? Wufei? But..why? No, no this can't be happening...//

He stood, his legs wobbling, intent on going back to the room, and confronting his teammate. But as his legs almost gave out, he cursed himself. He knew that if need be, he couldn't defend himself.

//I think I need to defend myself from Wufei? I can't honestly believe that he would do something to me can I?// But he just didn't know. //First the flowers, and now the look a like...no..this is Wufei. I *know* him...This has to be some sort of mistake..//

Trowa slowly made his way back down stairs, and into the lobby. He walked onto the street, inhaling the semi-fresh air, clearing his head. He saw a payphone across the street, and made his way to it. He picked up the torn phonebook, and searched for the hospital's number. He slid some coins in, and dialed.

"I need to speak with Heero Yuy. He's in the security room. Yes, I know this isn't normal, but it involves Quatre Winner. Put him on the damn phone, now!"