(Warnings: angst, very mild yaoi (not even any limes), language, and offensive material)

(Alert! This is a YAOI fic! If you feel uncomfortable or do not approve of YAOI’s please stop reading now! (YAOI = male to male relations)(Rated R)

Heero Yuy, a 17 year old ex pilot. Its been 1 year sense the second rebellion and he is now just a ‘normal’ teenager. Just like all the other gundam pilots..That is, except for Duo Maxwell. About a year after the first war (the one against Triez) Duo Maxwell had abandoned all hopes of ever being normal again. It was bad enough (thought Heero) that the boy (Duo) was an ex Gundam pilot, (that was almost enough to close the gates to normal) but he had also chosen to live an openly gay life. Heero had no idea of why his old partner had chosen to like men, and the thought of it sickened him (Heero). Heero shook his head, remembering when Duo had told him and the others, it had been around the time when Duo had begun to wear those leather pants and jacket (with the red shirt, from endless waltz). It was at the feast celebrating the end of war and beginning of peace. Heero had still been quiet then, just at the beginning or becoming normal at the time. Duo had stood up in front of his fellow Gundams (the pilots) and had simply said "I have come to a time in my life when I can not denie my true self, I have finely realized that I Duo Maxwell am a homosexual". Heeros jaw had dropped and Wufei had looked very uncomfortable. Trowa had said nothing. Quatra of course had tried to break the silence by saying "well its good that your being honest with yourself", but the atmosphere of the room had changed and it was obvious that none of us wanted to be near him anymore. Duo had been abit upset when Heero and the others began to seem to be shunning him. "Are you that uncomfortable with my life style Heero?" He (Duo) had asked. "The closet is for cloths not men," Heero has said. I don’t think that it was much of a coincidence that after that night Heero had lost touch with his once ‘close’ friend Duo Maxwell (although Duo tried very hard to remain friends). Heero had moved on with his life, living at Relena Peacecrafts boarding school. He took classes like a normal person, he talked to people and had friends like a normal people did, and he had a girl friend just like a normal boy should have (Relena or course). Heero had found that being normal and fitting in was actually much harder then being a perfect soldier! As a soldier his clothes and actions hadn’t been questioned or shunned. Heero thought about how his cloths and hair had changed from spandex (which Relena actually forbid him from wearing) and longish hair, to the short hair cut he had now and the genes that he wore when he wasn’t in his school uniform. He thought about how Duo was the exact opposite of him, with his leather outfit and long braided hair. Heero laughed to himself as he recalled how it had been when Duo hadn’t been openly gay, at that time it had actually been Duo who was telling him to act normal and fit in! Now it was Duo who was the different one. Heero wondered if the Queer would find the irony in this funny. Heero caught himself, realizing that he was actually missing his old friend. "Heero! We’ll be late for dinner if you don’t hurry!" yelled Relena through Heeros dorm room door. "Ok, ill be out in a minute," Heero yelled back. "Ok" said Relena. Heero changed out of his school uniform and into some more comfortable clothes forgetting his thoughts about Duo for the moment.

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Heero fell back into his room, full from the big dinner he had just eaten. He looked over at his desk to see the framed picture of his girl friend Relena Peacecraft. She was the most pretty and popular girl in the school (Heero thought) and he was lucky to have her. Heero thought of how Relena was attractive, but he frowned as he didn’t feel any emotion about it. Ah well thought Heero, she was only his girlfriend, she didn’t have to be his true love for him to be dating her, he was only 17. Heero closed his eyes, drifting near to sleep. ~ Relena may be cute but I love – an image of Duo popped into his head -~. The half-asleep Heero jumped out of bed a look of horror on his face. "Its ok, it was only a unconscious thought, it didn’t mean any thing" said Heero to himself, his breath coming hard as if he had just had a nightmare. Suddenly Heero remembered what Duo had told him when he had said men didn’t belong in the closet. Duo had said "of course men don’t belong in the closet, they belong in the open, that’s why I’m coming out". Heero got a drink of water and slowly sat back in his bed, afraid that his gay thought might still be they’re hidden among the sheets. "it was nothing to worry about" Heero told himself as he closed his eyes once more.

- Heeros dream -

Heero was trapped in a small dark dungeon like room. He was afraid, but he knew some how that someone was going to save him. He waited for what seemed like an eternity in his ‘cell’, all the time thoughts about Relena and how she had token away his spandex pants and made him keep his hair short kept coming to him ! Finally the door in his dream opened and his knight in shining armor came to save him. Heero found himself to be sporting his old hair cut and a long purple dress! Heero (in the dream) felt happy at the sight of his braided (hint hint) prince. The American swept him off of his feat and leaned into his face, Heero felt himself blushing red……- BEEP! BEEP! BEEP! Went Heeros alarm clock. Heero sat up fast and panicking, sweet dripping from his for-head. "it was just a dream" he repeated over and over to himself, and then as if to clear it with himself he said "I am as straight as Trowas tightrope" ~ but tightropes bend in the breeze ~ . Heero got up and took a cold shower, getting dressed in his normal clothes. As he passed the mirror he glanced at his hair, it looked chopped up and short, he found himself missing his old haircut. But that hair cut was gay (he thought to himself) I’m much better off with it short ~ or in a braid maybe? ~. Heero sharply left the room, hoping to leave the nonsense of his dream behind him. Heero felt a little better as he walked downstairs to breakfast. "Heero! There you are" came Relenas annoying voice. Heero felt the fear coming back and resting in his stomach as he saw the girl that he should have been in love with. ~ she’s hot ~ thought Heero, forcing himself to believe it. ~ don’t lie to yourself! ~ argued Heeros brain. Heero had to silence the thoughts ~ ill prove I love her ~ he thought, walking quickly up to her. Heero bent down and kissed Relena. "what was that for?" asked the blond. "nothing princes" said Heero using the pet name for Relena that she insisted he use. Relena smiled and they walked the rest of the way to the dining room hand in hand (Duo pushed from his mind, but not the lump in his stomach).

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The dreams continued to come until Heero could stand it no more! ~ ill call Duo! Then I can prove that I don’t love men ~ thought Heero. Heero picked up the Phone and dialed Duos number. Heero was surprised that he even remembered it. The phone rang a few times and then Duo picked up ~ oh god, what if I’m wrong? What if I am gay or what if he turns me gay? ~ Heero thought panicking. "hello?, hello?" came Duos voice from the phone. Heero quickly hung up. Duo stared at the phone ~ must have been a wrong number. Heero stood there, mad at himself for being so rude, even if Duo was a fag (- just to clear this, I do not approve of the use of the word fag, again this is only because its for the story-). Heero got a drink of water and stared at the phone for awhile getting his courage up. Heero finely picked up the phone and re-dialed the number. A few rings and then "hello?" came Duos voice. "hi" Heero choked out. "who is this?" asked Duo. "its Heero" said Heero feeling abit sick. "Heero? Is it really you? What do you want?" asked Duo. "I, I just felt like calling." Said Heero. "that’s great, I’ve missed you buddy, its been like a year sense the last time we talked- - Heero hung up- Heero was breathing hard. ~ I am such an ass hole ~ thought Heero as he re dialed Duos number. "hello? Heero? What happened? Is this you?" came Duos voice before the phone could ring even once. "I, I’m sorry about that" said Heero "my finger slipped on the receiver accidentally" Heero lied. "oh" said Duo. "so why do you call?". Heero paused ~ should he tell Duo the real reason? ~. "I missed you, I’m sorry that I haven’t kept in touch." Said Heero. "well that’s great, how’s your life?" asked Duo. "my life? Well…..". Heero paused and then suddenly blurted out "how did you know you where gay?". Duo took the phone from his ear and stared at it blinking. "um…. That’s a strange question Heero, why do you ask?" asked Duo. "oh, no reason, and I’m fine, thanks for asking" said Heero. Duo had a very confused look on his face "Heero are you ok?" asked Duo. "I… do you think we could um, get together some time?" asked Heero. "sure, of course Heero, but what’s this all about?" asked Duo. "its not a date!" said Heero, his heart beating a mile a minute. "I just had a dream about you and thought I should give you a call." Said Heero. "I see" said Duo. "of course, I’d love to see you again, as a friend of course" said Duo. Heero let out a sigh of relief and hung up the phone. Bring Bring, Heero picked the phone back up "hello’ said Heero. "um, Heero… when and where did you want to meet me?" came Duos voice. "oh sorry!" said Heero, "I’m not my self today". "I can tell" said Duo. "how about we meet at McDonalds, the one off 7^th avenue, say 5:00 today" said Duo. "um, ok" stuttered Heero. "ok then it’s a date!" said Duo and hung up. "ITS NOT A DATE!" yelled Heero into the phone, but it was to late (just so you know, Duo didn’t mean it like that (it’s a date as in ok ill see you then)). Heero hung up the phone and looked at himself in the mirror, surprised to find that the words it’s a date had made him blush a-little ~ that’s only because it made me uncomfortable (thought Heero) ~

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Heero walked into McDonalds 5 minutes late. Duo smiled and waved from a booth "hey Heero, come and sit down" said Duo. Heero awkwardly walked to the booth and sat down accrost from Duo. "Heero! What happened to your hair?!" exclaimed Duo, looking at the short hair on Heeros head. "where did it all go?". "um, Relena had me cut it, she said it looked gay long" said Heero. "oh" said Duo. Duo gave Heero a strange look "Heero are you ok?" asked Duo. "yes why do you ask?" asked Heero. "your cheeks look flushed" said Duo. ~ Am I blushing?! (thought Heero) ~ "I must be getting a cold" said Heero. "Heero, I know you’re uncomfortable around me and I don’t blame you, that’s why I’m wondering why you wanted to see me?" said Duo. Heero looked at Duo knowing that he couldn’t lie to him. "Duo?" said Heero. "what is it?" asked Duo. "how did you find out that you where gay? I mean I….I’m scared that I might find men attractive" said Heero, finely admitting what he had been denying, surprising himself by his own words! "Heero..is this what all this is about?" asked Duo. "yes" said Heero. "well then, I guess I am, or should be the expert at this" said Duo. "one day I woke up and realized that I was gay…there where other things that led up to it, I mean I went through all of this denial about it, but I finely just excepted myself for who I am." Said Duo. "yes, but how did you know because I’m not sure" said Heero. "why did you change your hair Heero?" asked Duo. "I told you, it looked gay" said Heero. "did you like it the old way better?" asked Duo. "I… yes" said Heero. "so...hows the closet?" asked Duo. "I DIDN’T SAY THAT I WAS A FAG! I JUST SAID THAT I DIDN’T KNOW!" Yelled Heero making people stare at them and talk. Heero blushed. "here, we can talk back at my place" said Duo, getting up. "o.k." said Heero, getting up as well. – back at Duos place – "well, has there been any guys you’re attracted to?" asked Duo. "maybe" said Heero. "oh" said Duo. ~ I love you Duo (thought Heero) ~ ~ what the hell am I thinking?! ~ . Duo walked up to Heero and leaned over him "do you find me attractive?" asked Duo. Heero looked at Duo "a little bit" said Heero. "What about Relena? You guys are dating right?" said Duo. "yes" said Heero. "do you find her pretty?" asked Duo. "yes" said Heero. "do you find her attractive?" asked Duo. "a little" said Heero. "does she turn you on?" asked Duo. Heero was surprised by Duos question but said "no". Duo smiled, "am I just good looking or do I do anything else for you?" asked Duo. "I, you, I mean to say" said Heero. Duo smiled and backed away from Heero, seeing that the Japanese was blushing. "well Heero its up to you, I cant tell you that your gay enless you really are" said Duo. "can I try something?" asked Heero. "sure, if there is anything you want to do or ask- Heero cut Duo off by kissing him! Duo looked at Heero "well?… are you gay Heero or do you still not know?" asked Duo. "I, I love you Duo but I’ve changed my mind, men do belong in the closet" said Heero. Duo looked at him. "I’m straight, because I want to be, straight like a cloths-line" said Heero. "but cloths-lines bend in the wind." Said Duo. "that may be so, but I think ill just stay in the closet" said Heero, kissing Duo once more. "it looks like you’ve opened the closet door to me" said Duo, kissing back. Heero pulled away, "goodbye Duo it was nice to get out". "good by Heero, I hope one day that you will come out to stay" said Duo. "I can’t" said Heero. "Relena and my pears have pad locked it shut.".- end