Extremes
Sorry about that, but its true. If I was a cop, I'd either be one of those coppers that went, "Oh...you murdered somebody? Psht--that doesn't matter, I'm sure you didn't mean it. They were probably an idiot anyways."
Or, I'd be the cop that went, "WTF punk! You were jaywalking! You see that curb? You see that street? Does it have big, white lines running across to the other side? NO. I'm gonna slap your ass with so many tickets its gonna make your head spin."
See what I mean? I'd either be a Republican or a Democrat. Wait a minute, not much of a difference there anymore. Scratch that. I'd be Pepsi or Coke...hold on...damnit.
Alright, alright...I'd either be Nader or Bill Gates. Bill Gates I prefer...mostly because Nader's a bitch. Poor guy, kinda feel sorry for him. That one vote for Nader during elections was probably a pity vote too. The government shouldn't allow 'pity votes'...the only reason why most people voted for Kerry was because they felt sorry for him...knowing that Teresa Ketchup held his balls in her iron fists of doom. Or people actually thought he was concerned about health-care. Whenever a presidental candidate gets up and talks about health care, I have to wipe the bullshit off the television. If all I have to do is hand out lies willynilly, I've got the presidency down pat. Watch...
"Hey dude, does that sandwich have mayo in it?"
"Why?"
"I'm allergic, man."
"Nope."
*Proceed on handing over sandwich with mayonnaise*
That's almost exactly what its like every time people run for president. It's chaos everywhere...people eating mayonnaise sandwiches when they're allergic, people tripping old ladies on the streets, and JAYWALKING! WTF IS UP WITH THAT!
Vote for Jackal 2008. My slogan will be: Healthcare is my number one priority. Oh yeah.