I tap my pencil repeatedly on my books. Why does class always have to be so boring? Especially archery. Boring, boring, boring. I just can't stand this anymore. Who cares about what angle you shoot your arrow at? Who cares if we can use a bow and arrow. I've gat a magical armour that I can use instead of dumb arrows! I wish the lunch bell would ring...

I could be eating or reading or even doing something like homework right now instead of sitting here in the class room, bored out of my mind, waiting for the lunch bell to ring. I'm really hungry too. Only ten minutes left, only ten minutes! I can't wait! Maybe I'll see Reune there too. We usually eat lunch together, when he's not eating with Aunja... I'm not jealous, I'm not jealous, I'm not jealous! No! I can't be! I can't like my best friend, not Reune, anybody but Reune is fine. I know this, I've known it forever, but it doesn't seem to matter anymore. Nothing matters. Reune is with Aunja.

The lunch bell is ringing, echoing through the halls but I don't care anymore. It doesn't matter. Nothing matters. I can't have what I want, what can make me happy. Why does every one else get it though? Everyone else has someone, something, just anything to make them happy. I don't. All I have is the great priveledge of being heir to the Dynasty when I'd rather open gates for living. Then I am forced to attend this school, when I'd rather just be me! And I have a best friend that I like in the bad way that you're never supposed to like a friend in. I hate myself for it. I'm glad I'm strong enough not to let my tears show right now, I'm also glad that I haven't left the classroom yet. The girls would be following me and I'm simply not in the mood.

I look up at my teacher, she's looking at me funny. Probably because I've never ever stayed after class. She moves from her desk and comes to crouch beside me. "Taran, what's wrong?" she asks, seeming like she actually cares. But she can't care, no one does. Even my best friend doesn't care.

"Nothing." I manage to choke out. I can't tell her what's bothering me. No one can know. Not even my best friend, especially not my best friend. Never my best friend. No!

"Taran, there's something wrong, you can tell me. It will stay strictly between us. I promise." She looks in my eyes, she really does seem to be sencere. Maybe I can... No! I can't! she would never understand it! I can't tell her! "Taran..."

"Fine! It's Reune!" I yell. She looks at me, a very shocked expression on her face. She frowns, wanting to know more. "I-i.... I think I'm in love with him..."

"Taran!" she exclaims.

"No! I'm serious! I just can't explain it. It's everything about him, the way he moves, the way he speaks, the way he can make my heart race when he walks into the room, the way I waish he'd smile at me the way he does to aunja, The way that he looks when he's cosentrating, so thoughtful and beautiful, I want him! I need him! But I can never have him!" I explain. It's crazy, why am I telling her this? I know why. I need to tell someone. And I guess that someone was Leona Sartain, my archery teacher. "I just can't take all these feelings anymore, they're running me to the ground!"

"Taran, you must tell him..."

"No! I can't! He'll reject me! He'll turn me away, he'll stop being friends with me! I can't tell him. He wouldn't understand..." I look down onto my desk, where my books are still open, most likely at the wrong page. I can tell that Leona is still looking at me, but I can't look back. I can't tell Reune, or anyone else. I just can't.

"But you must, he deserves to know. I'm sure he'll be ok with it. Even if he is the son of Lord Stryke. He's your friend and will understand. Taran..."

"That's easy for you to say! You're not the one who saw the look on his face when I said that I didn't like girls, this morning. He looked discusted, like I was some sort of street rat full of scars, with greasy, lice infested hair and dirty clothes. No, I won't tell him. I can't..." again I look away from her and to the desk. I know what she's going to say next. Something about being true to myself because I'm in the house of kon'i and that I should be true to my friends.

"Taran, do you remember your house's name? You've got to tell him, you're a good friend. Now, c'mon..." She puts her hand on my back and rubs back and forth to soothe me. It doesn't work and I won't tell Reune.

"No! I can't and I won't risk losing him to some stupid feeling..."

"How long has it been Taran?"

"About seven years. Since the day I first saw him, he was so young and shy, but I fell for him anyway. Reune..." I feel a tear leak over my eyelid and flow over my cheek. I wipe it away hastily, lest Leona see it. I can't let her see me act so weak. No, not the future ruler of the dynasty...

"Have you told anyone else, like Sekhmet or your house teacher?" she asks. I shake my head in responce. How can I tell anyone, it'll just get back to Reune. "Taran, you know that you can't keep this all to yourself, how you managed it for so long already is beyond me. I think that you should really tell Reune."

"I don't think I can though, he'll turn me away, refuse to stay friends, something like that. I couldn't deal with that, I don't have enough of him already. If I had less.... I don't know what I'd do."

"Taran, it's ok, It'll be ok, you just have to tell him, I'm usually always right about these things, trust me." I nod my head, I'll give it a try, but I still don't know how he'll react, but I will tell him, but how and when?

I just don't know anymore, everything is too confusing but there is one thing that I have to do, I have to tell Reune. And I will, if it takes my last ounce of courage, then I'll find a way to make Reune mine...

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