Again, not again. The dreams... The war...

While awake, I'm fine, but at night, it seems the souls of the soldiers I've killed come back to haunt me.

Who could help me? Who could I talk to? Vice-foreign Minister Dorlian? Silvia Noventa? Lucrezia Noin? Who?

No one. No one would understand. How could they? They've never been through what I have.

During the day, I have nothing to do but think of the war and the dreams. Fight and flight, hard decisions... By the end, I had nothing left. I never let anyone know, because that would have destroyed me.

The only thing that kept me going was the knowledge that to stop wouldn't just be death for me, but for the earth as well.

I'd get a job to destract me from the memories, except I don't exactly fit in well with normal people.

I try. I really do. It doesn't work. I'm _not_ a people-person. I look up at the clock; 3:51 am.

What I need is a job as a security guard, or something like that. I'll try some more tomorrow, anything to ward away the memories... But, for now, I need more sleep.

I open my eyes. The room is dark. My love has their arms around me and I can feel their breath against my cheek.

Who is it? i don't know, I can't remember. I should know, they'll be insulted that I don't know...

For the first time, I feel their soft hair against my cheek. It smells so good, a sort of herbal scent...

I awake with a start. I look around. A bit of light shines in through the window in the wall across the room from my bed. the light was a dim yellow, from the light post right outside on the street.

That dream was new. New and... strange, and somehow wonderful... Who was it? I still don't know. Is it a sign?

I look around in the dark. I sit up and let the blankets fall from my body onto the floor. As the warm night air hits my body, I realize that I'm in a cold sweat.

I get up, the room dimnly lit by the outside light, enough for me to see by. I walk over to the mirror that sits atop my dresser. I look at my reflection, to realize with shock, that there are tears streaming down my face. Is this really a reflection of me, or is it an illiusion?

I don't normally believe in that kinda stuff, but I didn't believe I'd have such trouble when the fighting stopped either.

If only... If only I knew who she was! The girl from my dream... Who was she? Maybe... maybe I can find her... Whoever she is, she could help, I just know she could.

And that... that must be what this dream is all about.

The next day, I sit away, tapping at my laptop when there's a knock at the door. Hmph, they'll go away... The screen glows and the words blur across my face. The knocking persists, becoming more and more incistent and louder at my absense.

I finish my typing, save and close. Then, I turn to the door. I walk over and open it to see none other than Milliardo Peacecraft.

"I knew you were in."

"Unh. Come in." I move out of the way and Milliardo comes in. i close the door behind me.

He skips straight to the point, "Raleena tells me you still haven't gotten a job, not even with all of your qualifications."

"She _still_ stalks me?"

The Lightning Count smirks and shos off a list of all of Heero's qualifications,obviously some of Raleena's handiwork. "Only in her spare time."

"Zechs, what are you doing here, I don't need this shit."

"I think maybe you do, y'see, I just might have a job for you. THE job for you, in fact." Milliardo smiles coily, in a way that reminds me of a snake. He's hiding something, there's obviously a down-fall in this perfect job.

"You know, the reason I haven't gotten a job is that I'm not a people-person." He's probably got me set up as a male stripper.

"You won't have to be." I must be doomed. "All you have to do is stand around _acting_ grumpy and glaring at people."

He's probably got me set up as a geography teacher.... controlling a bunch of insane kids isn't my idea of the ideal job.

I glare at Milliardo. "Sounds good. Too good. What is it?"

"Vice-Minister Dorlian..." Bad words, very bad words... I'm not sure I want to hear any more than that.... "...needs a body-guard."

"Me? Bodyguard RALEENA? Her idea..." I wish I could just refuse, but... well, I could use the money... and I KNOW she'd be a distraction... And not necessarily the good kind!

Actually, she doesn't even know yet. I just figured she'd prefer it if it was someone she knew. She's! not entirely for the idea. You seem to be her favorite, after all. The other pilots are all employed all ready anyways.
All employed. Except me. Duo works at the rebuilt Maxwell church, Trowa still at the circus, Quatra as, well, Quatra, the head of the Winnner family, and Wufei as a preventer. All employed, except...

"Accepted." All employed. "When do I start?"

Yay! All done. Un-yay! I'm sick. *kicks Mr. Ifluenza and sends him to bloody lag hell.* Anyways... yeah, this fic has absotivly posolutily NO reference to my firebird fics. It stands alone. Speaking of firebird, I should get typing that again, ne? Oh wells... Big Warning, Santa Dot, Mr. Pokemon and Neo-Nee are getting together to write a fic... and the whole world cowers in fear... 'nyways, C&C always welcome, ta!

-Tyria

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Gundam Wing Fanfiction
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