Step 12 Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to Compulsive Overeaters, and to practice these principles in all our affairs.
Newbie:
Oh I’m so glad to see you!! Someone has asked me to Sponsor them!
Sponsor:
Well done my friend!! I trust you said yes?
Newbie:
Oh well, no, I said I would talk to you first. You think I should say yes?
Sponsor:
It is totally up to you and what your Higher Power is leading you to. Did you pause and pray for guidance?
Newbie:
Hmmmm - OK no I didn’t, actually - I was just overwhelmed by being asked - I mean me! I’m so new here, and have so little experience! How can I be responsible for someone else’s abstinence?
Sponsor:
I think maybe you’re missing the point of step 12 - let’s look at what the Big Book says about this:
Big Book page 89:
Practical experience shows that nothing will so much insure immunity from drinking as intensive work with other alcoholics. It works when other activities fail. This is our twelfth suggestion: Carry this message to other alcoholics!
You see it’s quite specific - the main reason for carrying the message is so that WE keep our recovery - and then look how the passage carries on:
Life will take on new meaning. To watch people recover, to see them help others, to watch loneliness vanish, to see a fellowship grow up about you, to have a host of friends - this is an experience you must not miss. We know you will not want to miss it. Frequent contact with newcomers and with each other is the bright spot of our lives.
Newbie:
Well yes I do see that, I love it when Newcomers come into meetings, and I can share how I was, and see that recognition in their eyes:)
Sponsor:
You job is quite clear - have you read the "job description" that the Big Book gives us?
Newbie:
No - where is that?
Sponsor:
Page 102
Your job now is to be at the place where you may be of maximum helpfulness to others, so never hesitate to go anywhere if you can be helpful. You should not hesitate to visit the most sordid spot on earth on such an errand. Keep on the firing line of life with these motives and God will keep you unharmed.
Of course, for me that "most sordid spot" would be some of the fast food places I used to visit - I don’t need to now as that is not on my food plan, but if a suffering compulsive eater wanted me to meet them there, then I’d even visit one of them:)
Newbie:
Yes, I suppose it is similar to me buying ice cream for the others in my house - just because I have it in the house, doesn't mean I have to eat any of it - it’s not my food!
Sponsor:
And you have worked the steps - we have read the Big book together, and you have done your inventory and are completing your amends. Do you remember how we did that?
Newbie:
I do - we just took it at my pace, and you shared your ESH with me, and yes we read the Big Book and you shared bits that you had highlighted in the past
Sponsor:
Well my friend - I am not saying that I sponsor in the only way there is - or much less the best way there is! - but I do it the way my sponsor taught me - taking someone through the steps - being a loving witness as it says in our own OA 12 & 12. Just sharing of myself, and letting the sponsee be free to share of themselves - and I think that you could do that too!
Newbie:
Well yes I can try, and I can certainly share my Big Book things - I believe I have nearly as many highlights and markers in my copy as you do in yours!!
Sponsor:
And remember what we are responsible for...
Newbie:
We are responsible for our actions - not the outcomes!
Sponsor:
Yes indeed:) I think you will be a good Sponsor!!
Newbie:
Well, I will be the one HP needs to be right now and right here.
Sponsor:
Amen to that - that is all any of us can aspire to:)