You Know You're An
Internet Addict
When...
- You wake up at 3 am to go to the bathroom and stop to check your Email on the way back to bed.
- You name your children Eudora, AOL and Dotcom.
- You spend half of the plane trip with your laptop on you lap and your child in the overhead compartment.
- You decide to stay in college for an additional year or two, just for the free internet access.
- You find yourself typing "com" after every period when using a word processor.com
- You turn off your modem and get this empty feeling, like you just pulled the plug on a loved one.
- You start introducing yourself as "Jon at AOL dot com".
- Your wife drapes a blond wig over your monitor to remind you of what she looks like.
- All of your friends have an '@' in their names.
- You can't call your mother because she doesn't have a modem.
- Your phone bill comes to your doorstep in a box.
- You laugh at people with 28.8 baud modems.
- You move into a new house and decide to Netscape before you landscape.
- You check your mail. It says "no new messages." So you check it again.
- You don't know what gender three of your closest friends are, because they have neutral screen names and you've never bothered to ask.
- You refer to going to the bathroom as downloading.
- You tell the cab driver you live at http://69.luck.street/house/bluetrim.html
- Your spouse makes a new rule: "The computer cannot come to bed."
- You ask a plumber how much it would cost to replace the chair in front of your computer with a commode.
- You start tilting your head sideways to smile. :-)
- You turn on your computer, and turn off your spouse.
- Your best friend is someone you've never met.
- Your spouse says communication is important in a marriage... so you buy another computer, and install a second phone line so you can chat.
- You begin to wonder how on earth your service provider is allowed to call 200 hours per month "unlimited."
- Your dog has its own home page.
- So does your gold fish.
- After reading this, you immediately Email it to a friend.
