Only in America can a homeless combat veteran live in a cardboard box and a draft dodger live in the White House.

Only in America can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance.

Only in America are there handicap parking places in front of a skating rink.

Only in America do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions.

Only in America do people order double cheese burgers, a large fry, and a diet coke.

Only in America do banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to the counters.

Only in America do they leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put useless junk in the garage.

Only in America do they use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so they won't miss a call from someone they didn't want to talk to in the first place.

Only in America do they buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight.

Only in America do they use the word "politics" to describe the process so well: "Poli" in Latin meaning "many" and "tics" meaning "bloodsucking creatures".

Only in America do they have drive-up ATM machines with Braille lettering!