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Leave smokers alone assholes. |
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America is the greatest country in the world. It's probably the greatest country in the universe, we're especially better than all those buttfucking aliens flying around. Sure, America has its faults, like whiney, politically correct, liberal assholes who bitch all the time and piss me off constantly. It's still the greatest country in the world and we have more freedoms here than anywhere else. Yet, our freedoms are being taken away from us. You can rarely speak your mind without offending some pussy who will sue you at the drop of a hat, PETA and faggy vegans everywhere are trying to stop people from enjoying a good burger, and a bunch of self-righteous assholes are trying to keep people from smoking. |
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In New York, they're making tons of new laws restricting smoking and smoker's activities. Hell, a pack of smokes is around eight bucks in New York. What, there's not plenty of clean air for everyone? There's so little air on this huge planet that a small group of people who smoke are killing everyone? What the fuck is wrong with people? Let the smokers smoke. They can't smoke in restaurants or bars like God intended, and now people don't want them to be able to smoke outside in public. What the fuck? What a bunch of fascist bullshit. |
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Smoking brings people a little extra pleasure in their otherwise dreary lives and that's going to be taken from them. They tax the shit out of smokes, but I guess that's not enough. I guess everyone can't be happy until smokers are outlawed, hunted like rabid dogs, and shot in the streets. If you don't like smoke, move away from it. Some guy walking down the street, happily puffing on a cigarette, will only be in your vicinity for like two seconds. That isn't going to kill you. Let the man enjoy his smoke. If he weren't allowed to smoke, he might go apeshit and shoot your sorry ass. |
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The media, especially the whole TRUTH campaign, demonizes smoking so much every stupid shit in the world thinks it's worse than it really is. Some whiney cunt on tv sobbing through her lines, "My dad smoked once when he was in the army sixty years ago, and last year he died". No shit? What a bunch of sensationalist garbage. "My mother was a smoker and it killed her." I bet it didn't hurt that she was five hundred pounds and had an aneurism, it was all smoking's fault. Sure, smoking isn't good for you, but nothing is these days. People are always looking for a way to take some happiness out of people's lives. |
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I hate stupid hippies who bitch about cigarettes. If people want to smoke, let them smoke, if people don't want to smoke, they don't have to. Stop making people who smoke look like Hitler. If a drink, or a smoke will make life worth living five minutes more, I say, drink up and light up. |
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Here are a few handy phrases to use when some idiot bitches at you about smoking. I've actually seen people pull over, get out of their car, and walk over to someone minding his own business, and give them shit for smoking. These people could be easily shut up with a sharp kick to the groin, but that's illegal too. |
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Self-righteous bitch: I used to smoke you know, it is really bad for you. It will kill you. It would've killed me but I beat big tobacco and quit.
Smoking, non-brainwashed guy: Really? It'll kill me? (Takes a smooth and satisfying drag on cigarette and exhales smoke happily) Boy that's smooth. I bet you miss that. How long has it been since you last smoked a cigarette? Gosh, one of these in the morning makes the stress of a busy day at work just fly by. Hey bitch, stop drooling and get off my lawn. |
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Non-smoking asshole: You know, that'll kill you.
Happy Smoker: So will stress, so don't worry about it. |
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Big, stupid, dirty asshole: Smoking kills.
Smoker: So does drinking gasoline. Fuck off. |
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Idiotic jerk-off: Cigarettes will kill you.
Smoker: I'm counting on it. (Put cigarette out on your tongue) |
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Anti-smoking nazi: Smoking causes cancer you know.
Smoker: Actually, my physical makeup is different than the average person. So, in my case, smoking prevents cancer. |
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That ought to shut them up, or at least piss them off. Maybe next time they'll think twice about fucking with a smoker. Next time you're somehwere with no laws against smoking in public, and someone near you fake coughs to let you know they are an anti-smoker, light up five or six smokes at once, and blow all that smoke right in their face. It's not as satisfying as punching them right between the eyes, but it still works. |
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Home. |
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