I feel like my center-
my place of gravity and peace 
and knowledge and light
is folding in onto itself
and I am grasping at illusions 
as I fall to the earth...

my equilibrium has taken flight
and numbness is setting in.

It’s a struggle to keep smiling.

The truth I thought I lived
has merely been a shadow,
and the death I thought I died to him
was nothing more than words...

But those words-
they had the power to heal.

Those words closed the door to my depression
and opened a window to a joy
more profound than chocolate...

Those words gave me comfort,
and strength,
and the courage to deny
and defy
the world
when everyone else is saying no...

And it is those words I will run to now,
because I know that they are true.
I have felt the conviction of His love
and feel the blessings of His favor on my life.

I am dealing with the knowledge that I 
am not finished yet...
and it is all right-
I am God’s workmanship-
and art is still art;
even in the process of perfection.