Still Waters

and after one night
of conversations and
beer,
you think you know me...
And even though
you are the only person
I've truly been able to
envision myself with,
I won't let myself
get attached,
or become entangled.
You think you know me-
but what you don't see
would shock,
offend and hurt you...
They say still waters
run deep,
and babe,
I'm as shallow as they come...
and I hate myself
for feeling like I would be
trapped-
for thinking
I need to sleep around
to be happy...
Someday I'll change my mind
and all of the wonderful people
who came and shaped my life,
and actually gave a damn
will be gone and I'll be left
with a regret more profound
than anything I've experienced
thus far...
So- I don't know what I have 
to win
by behaving like such a fool,
but it may be too late
to stop the downward spiral...