Pride Things...

I only miss you sometimes-
and it's more of a pride
thing, really-
insult and outrage
that you would rather
be without me...
But most of the time
I'm happy.
I avoid conversations
about Reggae
and pizza
and I'm fine...
My smiles may
not be 100%
but I'm trying...
And it's only in the 
middle of the afternoon,
and late at night
that I feel like
I'll be alone forever...
and its only as I start
each new day
that my heart
aches because I miss you...
But I can watch red Sox games
without wanting to hide in
the nearest pillow to shut
it all out...
But I still have to force myself
not to look for your car
in the parking lot
outside your building...