Igor Bars

Or:  The Year of Eating Dangerously
by John Kovalic and Lori Ann Curley

Serves 1-18 (one gamer or 18 normals, modified from the original recipe)

"I just made them to bring into the office.  They are evil -- you must make them.  The recipe says it makes 8 bars.  It is best consumed in small squares.  Be warned."  --Formica Salt   from the Army of Dorkness e-mail list.

Cross Section of Igor Bars
The picture is a cross-section of Lori's first attempt at Igor Bars (Gen Con 2002):

Ingredients:
The Igor Bar recipe gives you the basics, but after a year of Igor Bar bake-offs (held at many conventions around the US and UK), here are some transcriptions and notes garnered from experience: 

Igor Bars Recipe

Rice Krispies Treats recipe:
Ingredients:
margarine, 3 tablespoons
regular sized marshmallows, 10 oz
Rice Krispies, 6 cups
Instructions:
melt margarine and marshmallows over low heat til completely melted
remove from heat
stir in cereal until well coated
Brian (The World's Best Husband) Curley's short-cut for Rice Krispies Treats:
Purchase a (large) jar of marshmallow creme in lieu of margarine and marshmallows;  mix with cereal;  microwave as needed to melt;  spread in pan

Igor Bars Close Up
Igor Bars Contest Winner:  Dorkstock 2002

Hints from the Army of Dorkness:
    I used a 10" x 15" jellyroll pan like it said in the back of the Nestle chocolate chip package, and I made the cookie base from scratch just using the directions on the back of the Nestle chip package. With the Rice Crispy Treats I also used the recipe from the back of the box. All together
they ended up being taller than the sides of the jellyroll pan but it wasn't a problem. The wax-paper lining the pan is important to getting the whole thing out of the pan so they can be cut. And they are very heavy. I couldn't believe how much they weighed.
   
My double boiler was ready before it dawned on me that I would have to unwrap all those caramels. Better yet get an assistant to do that grunt work for you. Rinsing with *very* hot water works best at  dissolving the sugary and fatty ingredients stuck to the pan if you have good water pressure or a sprayer hose for the sink.  I had to wash my double boiler after the caramels so I could melt the chocolate. Igor bars dirty a lot of pans.
    I used a non-stick pan sprayed with cooking spray, lined with waxed paper which I sprayed with cooking spray. The whole heavy mass of bars lifted right out by lifting the waxed paper (which is good because it would have ruined my nonstick pan to cut them if they stayed in the pan).
    Those suckers are dense. I'm about ready to make them again. They were daunting at first and I can't eat more than 2 at a time but I've begun to crave them.

If you have any more questions feel free to ask.
-Aileen E. Miles


    If you would like your Rice Krispie top to be chewey, I would suggest only melting the marshmallows half way.  Having worked in a buffet style restaurant for 8 years, I find this to be the most appealing method to please the customers with a gooey, ooey dessert treat.
-Mark, Semi-professional chef of steak, chiiiicken and anything with sugar ;)

1. Use cookie dough that comes in a tube.  You're going to be doing a lot of cooking, so any shortcuts you can take are good.
2. Sit down while unwrapping the caramels.  My feet aren't supposed to hurt that bad until after Gen Con.
3. To save money: don't buy big bags of peanut M&Ms or toffee chips.  I just bought two individual bags of peanut M&Ms and two Heath Bars.  The latter I chopped in my chopper.
4. Have an empty sink ready and start soaking the pans you use for cooking right away, especially for melting things like caramels, marshmallows, and chocolates.
5. Do use the microwave for melting;  it's faster, cooler, and easier to keep control of how much melting is done.
6. Just buy a deep foil pan at the store.  Trust me, you don't want to attempt washing any pan used for Igor Bars.
7. Use a big and heavy knife for cutting.  A guillotine would work best.
8. Have handi-wipes and insulin ready when eating Igor Bars.
Good luck,
-Lori

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