this is a tribute.

 

to all who’ve been behind me, and all who’ve been trying to clear a path in my mind.

 

jianye: dunno if you’ll read this, but just wanna thank you for that talk that somehow inspired me lots. somehow I draw strength from what you said. no, I won’t like suddenly pop her a question or something like that, but I’ll just maintain my current relationship with her. which I don’t really know what the hell is going on, but I dare say I’m ok with it, no matter how confused I am. at least we’re still able to talk and meet and such etcetc… but I got some advice for you on the other hand… don’t treat it like a cold-unfeeling-meticulous plan. it’s the spontaneity, the sincerity that really decides what’s gonna happen. think you know what I mean rite? just wanna say thanks again for all the strength you’ve unknowingly bestowed upon me. heh. too dramatic word – bestowed.

 

grace: thanks a lot too. felt much better after reading what you wrote. and you took time from your own troubles to find the strength to encourage me. there’s nothing more precious than that on earth. a soulmate. an angel. that someone three years younger than me behaves like an angel to me, and is able to give sober advice at times of need speaks volumes about your maturity – beyond your age. no, I’m not saying you’re old =) hope you settle your problems real soon, and get on with life. the flowers are gonna smell sweeter, the stars brighter, and the road wider in the coming days without him. no matter how much you deny it, you know deep down inside that you’re attractive – both outside and inside. treasure yourself. that’s what you are too – a treasure. =)

 

zhiwei: I think you probably can’t read this cos you have problems with your browser you stupid moron. haha… ok I take that back. this is supposed to be a tribute. thanks for all the times you have shown me the other side. the not-so-optimistic side. you might think you’re dampening my spirit, but I really appreciate that cos it doesn’t let me soar too high before falling with a huge crash (yeah, thanks to the huge body mass you’d say =). though people can say that it doesn’t make a difference whether you fall from 20 storeys or 70 storeys – you still die. but I do believe those 50 storeys’ less fall would help. a lot. hope your concerto goes really well, and may you stay happy forever. =)

 

anyone else: can’t really think of anyone else who’s been able to dig deep into me… perhaps yihua if you’re reading this? thanks for all your encouraging comments… I really hope what you said was true. but that possibility somehow diminishes with the passage of time.

 

yep. gonna end here. thanx again.

 

dejectium out

17 january 2003

0153 hrs gmt +8

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