just finished my usual nightly jog. think
I have quite a bit to say tonight…
was chatting to her closest friend on icq
just now. (let’s call her xl – nope, not for
extra-large. heh.) first
talked about mostly mundane stuff, the usual pleasantries and such. then I tried to test the waters a bit by leading into the
topic… so I said: don’t think I should
ask her out on vdae rite? don’t
wanna make things difficult for her...
and waited for her reply. after
all she should give the most appropriate answer since they both know each other
so well.
and so she said: if u ask
me… well i dun think u shld
leh.....
and so I said: yepyep... that settles
it i guess =I
but does it? I still have no idea. guess I still
harbour hopes that she’s changed her mind towards me
since the two of them last talked about me? but I guess
I’ve more or less made up my mind not to ask her out for valentine’s day. perhaps get her a little present as a thoughtful gesture? ok,
I’ve put it down on record that I’m not gonna ask her out on valentine’s already, so may lightning
strike me if I do anything stupid, like ask her out and get rejected and get
depressed and… yep you get the drift.
and so I’d probably spend valentine’s alone?
again.
then I decided to go jogging. felt really
tired, but still I persevered. don’t wanna grow fat(ter) and give her
all the more reason not to like me? heh
think I’m well on the way to dieting correctly. lunch
was normal, dinner was fruit, and that’s all. and
jogging at night.
since I was lethargic, I thought I might as well
sing some tune in my head to take my mind off the 5km route full of upslopes and downslopes. and stupidly I picked james barnes’ third symphony to hum. probably
because it lasts 38 minutes, just nice for the run I thought. and so I lapsed into the first movement, and that passed
uneventfully. though the upslopes
did somehow coincide with the
traumatic parts in the symphony… haha.
then I got to the second movement, describing the cynical nature of
man and society. and just as coincidentally, I started
to embark on one of the steeper upslopes I’d face. just as I reached the super loud climax of the second
movement. reached the top, and the way down was
uneventful again. just as uneventful as the beginning
of the third movement.
then came the part that amazed me tremendously. struggling
up the steepest upslope in my run, I just absentmindedly continued singing the
tune in my head. just as I reached the apex, a strong
cool gust of wind started blowing. and at the same
time I realised I reached the soprano-alto saxophone
duet in the symphony. one of the most beautiful parts
of the symphony. and so I made up my mind to tell min’er about this experience. perhaps
it’d mean little to her, especially since I’m starting to behave
obsessive-compulsively haha. but
I really hope she’d be able to feel that same great feeling I was feeling when I
reached the top of that slope as she plays that duet this saturday.
yep. guess that’s about all I have to say
tonight. wasn’t planning to blog,
but really have to pen (or keyboard) down what I have in mind.
dejectium out
0241 hrs gmt
+8