I’ve finally laid to the rest the ghosts of yesteryear.

 

I’ve been offered this job at school, which involves meeting lots of vips and vvips. and because of that, we’re required to be dressed immaculately. long-sleeved solid-coloured shirts, with a coat. essentially business suits.

 

and where, thus, do the ghosts come in?

 

needed expert female opinion – female cos they’re best at shopping – so I asked a few friends to help out. first try rebuffed – not free. second one rebuffed – not free too. I didn’t really want to ask her, cos I wasn’t sure if I had indeed banished those ghosts.

 

but down to a matter of no choice, so I sent the sms anyway. and before I had time to regret, I saw the message sent screen. too late to retract.

 

then I settled down to sleep, and she called. she was free, so we set meeting time. orchard.

 

 

******

 

edit: that was a corny page break eh? what the hell, 6 asterisks? haha

 

and so we met, and shopped for clothes. the usual cosy banter, her usual lilting laughter, sparkling eyes. to me, it was a nice meet up, especially since we hadn’t went out and really talked for so long. and surprise surprise, the pain was no longer permanently there. sure, little sharp pangs once in a while, whenever I faced certain reminders of past times, but I believe I’ve grown to accept status quo.

 

in fact, I enjoyed the easy way in which we could communicate. with mutual trust: my trust that she wouldn’t lead me on, her trust that I hadn’t any ulterior motives. hmm. maybe I even grew to treat her like a little sister; it was easy with her childlike behaviour.

 

in a way, I’m very glad that I didn’t manage to win her heart. after clearing things up, I’m proud of the fact that we’re still able to just go out and enjoy ourselves, in a way that couples can’t after they break up, no matter how amicable their partings were. this way, at least I’ve kept a friend. even gained one, if I dare say.

 

I’m not going crazy, but she’s a nice little sister to have. haha.

 

and I’m not writing more about it anymore. some things are best kept to memory.

 

 

******

 

 

on another hand, (I’ve got so many hands that I keep saying on another hand haha…)

 

 

haven’t updated for so long because I was away enjoying at genting. it was great, staying totally out of contact for 3 days. starting to understand why yh doesn’t want a cellphone. I resolved to throw back all the troubles and work that I had for those three days, totally enjoy myself, and just face the bloody backlog when I’m back, refreshed.

 

I’ve managed to achieve all that, except for the refreshed part. I’m more tired. heh. but mentally more able to face all the work that is to come. at least I know this holiday has been worthwhile. it was a great trip. things you usually can’t do when you’re touring with the family, you can do with your friends. I’m not talking about prostitutes you bloody pervert, if that’s what you’re thinking. I mean scream to high heavens (I know it’s stink to high heavens, but I like it this way too) at totally un-scary rides. and realising that teacup is the scariest ever ride you’ve taken (because you spin so fast that everything’s a blur – that includes the mess that’s threatening to move back up your oesophagus), taking the drop twice, trying to sabotage each other… and of course, casino baby!

 

of course, as all band people go, there were lots of stoning session, but heck, the trip cost an exorbitant $45 bucks, so who am I to complain? it’s less than S$1 per hour of enjoyment!

 

guess we’d upgrade the next time we go overseas. hongkong or taiwan anyone? then japan or korea? then russia? heh... the last one was a joke, babes and cheap vodka notwithstanding.

 

yup. so that’s basically it for now. work to come, every day except tuesday for the next two weeks, then it’s off to KL for another short trip, this time to watch chelsea in the flesh! hope abramovich signs some stars to bring down.

 

that was a damn cheery entry! =p

 

dejectium out

12 july 2003

0055 hrs gmt +8

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