Announcement

 

Here are two little pieces I’ve written while I took a four-month break in England. More accurately, they were written while I was travelling, so they’re not exactly written in England. Since then, I think I’ve undergone a huge change in the ‘fullness of my cup’ – from half-empty to half-full – and that would probably be reflected someway or other in my writing. This author-wannabe would like to emphasise that this site would then act as an outlet of literary expression, and ensuing entries would be fictional, or inspired somehow by real-life happenings, but not cut so close to life as the hitherto writings have been. That said, I still hope I can achieve the level of emotional depth frequent writers of this site have come to expect.

 

I’d also like to thank everyone for your encouraging comments. You’ll notice that I’ve removed the feedback link because I’ve not checked that email enough for it to remain active, so hotmail has closed it down. I’ll be scouting for a less hostile server; in the meantime I’m afraid I won’t be able to get feedback.

 

Hope everyone’s having a good time!

 

1909 hrs gmt +8

15 february 2005

back home

dejectium

 

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Writing on a Train from Munich to Zurich

 

Yet again I write at a watershed moment of the year. Last day of 2004, on a train from Munich to Zurich on the last leg of my European travels, I recount the way the year has sped past, at about the same time as my best pals at home are preparing to go out for the end-of-year party.

 

It’s been a fast year to me, and the past three months have sped by particularly quickly, especially with all that travelling across Europe. And the part of the year before that has been noticeably quiet and peacefully insignificant, probably owing to my optimistic 2004 mindset and that resolution to get immersed in work and school, such that emotional needs don’t get much thought. Perhaps this explains the sudden feeling of emotional emptiness that’s been bugging me for the past few days, and the return of that longing that hasn’t featured in my thoughts for quite a while. I almost immediately thought of her as I woke up today, and I reminisce about the New Year’s Eve we spent together, alone, two years ago. But all that is nostalgia, which some smart aleck once defined as the pining for something one has never had, and deserves to be swept away to the back of memory in that annual defragmentation of the mind. On a personal scale, the end of 2004 deserves to be a celebration of the peaceful year I’ve been fortunate enough to enjoy, and whilst I’d be fine with a  bit more excitement next year, I wouldn’t complain if it remains just as uneventful.

 

On a larger scale though, I’d guess it wasn’t that smooth a year for many friends, and definitely not that for the thousands of people suffering in the world, be they Afghans, Iraqis, Sri Lankans, Indonesians, Thais, Swedes or North Koreans. Perhaps the only spiritual or mental consolation I can offer is that the end of 2004 is nigh, and 2005 will be a much better year, especially if one has already hit pit-bottom. As an all-encompassing New Year wish, I wish that everyone be able to have a smooth sailing 2005, and that everyone would be able to face any incoming adversities (there will be some, I’m sure) with ample optimism and stoicism, emerging as stronger and even more optimistic individuals after that. Optimism, after all, is like a snowball, growing bigger as it collects more snow along the way.

 

Wishing all a great 2005,

Dejectium.

 

Dejectium out.

1405 hrs gmt +1

31 Dec 2004

Memmingen, German-Austrian region

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Train Ride Alone, Early 2005

 

Seeing the country lights twinkle in front of me like stars, I couldn’t help but feel lost among the dark wilderness out there with only those lights for comfort. A long journey alone is usually therapeutic, but the recent events leading up to it weren’t exactly smooth. For a start, the train tickets I paid for couldn’t get to me, so I had to buy a ticket on the spot for £12.50 and try to claim it back later (edit: unsuccessfully). Then (of decidedly less drastic consequences), the plastic bag carrying my stuff broke, leaving me to carry one bag with two hands, made worse by the fact that the contents were fragile. I then tried to look forward to making myself some cheap cheese sandwiches to temporarily curb my hunger, but found out unfortunately that my cream cheese (from Venice!) leaked out of its container. Fortunately it was within another container, so too bad, no cheese sandwiches.

 

Next is the uncertainty facing me when I get back to Leeds. I booked a bus ride to London tomorrow, but I can’t remember what time it is till I get back home. Then again, I need to collect my match tickers to a football match in London from the postbox within the office, which is locked, so I pray to goodness the office opens early enough tomorrow for me to still catch my bus. Else I’d have to waste some more money.

 

Somehow it all doesn’t look that bad anymore after writing them down. It’s the 3^rd already, and it’s only about two and a half weeks before I make that long journey home to meet my family, my friends again. (Of course there’s still the matter of 3 exams and a 3000-word paper to deal with in the meantime). As much as it’s just an appropriate time for me to start missing home at this moment, I’m happy to be able to say that I’ve had a great time so far. I’ve had the chance to experience so many cultures first-hand, the chance to travel to so many places I haven’t been to before, and the chance to make so many new friends from other countries. I’ve had the chance to see what I’ve always wanted to see – football, musicals, famous architecture, famous sights, and yet have so much rest I never thought I’d be able to get.

 

I need to be thankful for how smooth everything has been, and be prepared for what’s to come in 2005. It’s been a great experience, and I’ll hold dear to these memories.

 

dejectium out.

1850 hrs gmt +1

3 jan 2005

Warrington, on Transpennine Express

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