Deep, deep

Part 19

 

 

Shinya face was burning.

 

Die slaps me! He slaps me?

 

Die look at the frighten drummer, realizing what he had just done to the man. He wanted to comfort Shinya, wanted to apologize to him but just as he wanted to stretch out his hand to touch the drummer, Shinya moved away, looking scared.

 

“ Shinya I’m sorry…” Shinya moved away again when Die wanted to touch him. “ Shinya…”

 

Shinya was keeping his head down. “ Go away…” Shinya muttered softly, afraid that Die might hit him again. “ Leave me alone.”

 

Die rubs his forehead, stand up and left the room, slamming the door hard behind him. Leaving the crying drummer in the room.

 

Shinya was shaking somehow; he did not expect Die to slap him. “ Did I do something wrong again? What have I say just now?” Shinya muttered to himself. “ Die was angry, I’ve make him angry?” Shinya slowly stands up and walks to the drawer, opening it and took out his medicine. “ I must have forgotten to eat medicine, I’ losing control again?” Shinya pour all his medicine into his mouth.

 

 

Die just walk out of the kitchen with a can of beer in his hand when he heard thing breaking inside the room. Afraid something might happen to the drummer, he storm into the room and see the drummer holding onto his throat, seem to be choke.

 

“ What have you eaten?” Die exclaimed and hit on the drummer back, hoping Shinya would throw out the thing choke in his throat. “ Spilt it out…”

 

Shinya slowly throw out the medicine he had swallowed. “ I must eat the medicine… I’m losing control, I’m making you angry.” Shinya speak softly when he manages to talk. “ I must eat it.” Shinya was squatting on the floor picking the medicine up.

 

“ Shinya don’t…” Die pulled the man up and hugs him tightly. “ I’m sorry… I’m not angry with you.”

 

Die curse himself for what he had done to his lover. He was feeling miserable now… remembering he had causes all this and about Toshiya, which he had just know from Kaoru the bassist was still bother by their pass relationship.

 

“ Shinya I’m really sorry… for everything.”

 

“ Die you’re not angry with me?”

 

“ No… really.”

 

“ Really?”

 

Shinya smiled, hugging his lover. Die stroke his lover hair, thinking maybe the drummer condition is getting worse? Shinya was crying at one moment and smiling as if nothing had happened the very next moment. Die was starting to get worried. 

 

 

 

The next morning, Kyo was awake ‘early’ though it already late. Kaoru had just hanged up the phone, was shrieking from the other side of the phone at Kyo for being late and asking about Toshiya wondering why the two had not go for practices.

 

Kyo hanged up the phone and walks to Toshiya room, wanted to wake the bassist when he heard sound of breaking glass inside the room. Worried, Kyo storm into the room without knocking.

 

“ What happened?” Kyo exclaimed. “ Toshiya…”

 

Broken glasses were shattered around the floor and Toshiya was standing in front of the broken mirror. Kyo look at his friend, his heart was beating fast, the first time he felt frighten about his bandmate. Toshiya was looking aimlessly at the broken mirror.

 

“ Toshiya… what happened… are you alright?” Kyo asked worried, wondering should he call Kaoru to come over.

 

Toshiya did not move nor say a thing.

 

“ Toshiya…?”

 

Kyo was being alert looking at Toshiya, prepare for anything that would happen the next moment. Slowly, Toshiya turn around and look at Kyo. Kyo froze, could not even utter a word.

 

“ Kyo what happened to my face?” Toshiya asked with shaking voice.

 

Kyo stare at Toshiya face not knowing what to say. The cut was indeed bad, the wound was bleeding; properly Toshiya had scratched it earlier on. Toshiya must been scare by his own look and had broke the mirror, Kyo guessed.

 

“ Will this wound disappear Kyo?” Toshiya asked again.

 

“ Come here.” Kyo walk toward the bassist and pulled him out of the room. “ Sit down here.” Kyo order and Toshiya obeying listen to the man.

 

Kyo come back with some new cotton and lotion that the doctor had gave to Toshiya. Kyo carefully apply the lotion and medicine on the bassist face and cover it up with the new cotton.

 

“ Don’t pulled it off again, be careful.” Kyo said seriously. “ Aright, get change now, we’re late for practice.” Kyo continue, wanted to get the bassist out of the house so that Toshiya would not have so much time to think of his wound.

 

Kyo was worried. The cut on Toshiya face was not very good. Will it leave a scar? Toshiya weren’t acting normal just now too… thing would be awful if… Kyo sighed.

 

 

Kyo and Toshiya finally arrival in the studio an hour later and practice immediately start without a question being ask. Kyo seem to be the only person who is really practicing. All the others were totally bother by their personal affair.

 

During the break time, Die and Kaoru was talking about Shinya condition which both are concern of. Die had just brought Shinya to check up this morning.

 

“ You mean he swallowed all his medicine?” Kaoru was shocked when Die told him. “ What the doctor had said?”

 

“ Shinya mental condition was getting slightly more serious. Maybe after what happened yesterday, I shouldn’t have slapped him.” Die frown.   

 

“ He still need his medicine everyday and we should not excite him too much…” Kaoru was thinking what he should do to help his bandmate. “ Maybe except for practices, we don’t let him see Toshiya too often?”

 

“ Kaoru… it’s not possible. We’re a band…”

 

Die and Kaoru was thinking, considering what is the better way to help Shinya when Kyo approaches them and tell them what happened to Toshiya earlier on at home.

 

“ He WHAT!?” Kaoru exclaimed, nowadays his bandmate really giving him heart attack. 

 

Die nearly jumps down the building, cursing.  “ Everything was all because of me. What can I do to make up for all this?” Die muttered, squatting onto the floor.

 

Kyo sighed.

 

Kaoru rubs his forehead.

 

The band is ruining…

 

“ Maybe I should have a talk with Toshiya…” Die said suddenly.

 

“ What can it help?” Kaoru seem to disagree. “ What do you want to tell him?”

 

“ I must at least apologize for hurting him…”

 

“ Just let him do so.” Kyo approve to Die. “ You know Toshiya somehow quite listen to what Die said.”

 

Kaoru was slightly jealous on what Kyo had said, wondering why should Toshiya listen to what Die say, because they were lover huh? Kaoru sulked.

 

 

Toshiya sit dazing on his bed. Kyo had clear up the glasses on the floor and had give a stupid excuse to let Toshiya keep his door open in case anything happened. Toshiya understand what Kyo was trying to do, just obey and keep his door open.

 

Few minutes later, Kyo walks pass the bassist room again. The vocalist had been doing so every few minutes and it was really irritating Toshiya.

 

“ Kyo!” Toshiya called this time. “ Come in, won’t you?”

 

Kyo grin and walk into the room, taking a sit beside Toshiya. “ Are you alright?” He asks concern.

 

“ I must have scared you this morning huh?” Toshiya asked. “ Don’t worry, I was just kind of scare by the wound that make me lose my sense. I’m alright now.”

 

Kyo believed. The bassist was talking as usual now. “ Don’t worry, it will heal but make sure you don’t scratch it again.” Kyo warned.

 

“ I know…”

 

They kept quiet.

 

“ What happened to you and Kaoru?” Kyo asked out of the sudden. “ Quarrel?”

 

Toshiya shake his head. “ Worse than that, only lover quarrel isn’t it?” Toshiya give a giggle.

 

Kyo let Toshiya rest his head on his lap and Toshiya starts telling Kyo about his problem with Kaoru. “ I didn’t know what should I do.” Toshiya asked after he ended.

 

“ It’s obvious that you love him, just give him a chance to make up for what he had done.” Kyo gave his thought. “ Why make life miserable for Kaoru and yourself?”

 

“ But I’m…”

 

“ Give him a chance Toshiya, I’m sure you two will be happy together. Kaoru love you.”

 

Toshiya did not speak again, his mind was starting to accept what Kyo had say, maybe he should make himself less miserable, maybe he should accept Kaoru… he can’t just let Die bothering him forever. Die had Shinya now and Kaoru was waiting for him… Kaoru love me…

 

“ Should I huh?” Toshiya asked suddenly but no reply came from the man.

 

Kyo was already fast asleep. Toshiya smiled, looking at Kyo. Thinking back, Kyo was always with him whenever he had problem, Kyo cares a lot for him. Toshiya stands up and lightly put Kyo to sleep on his bed. He places the blanket around the sleeping man. “ If it was you that I’m in love with…” Toshiya muttered to himself and laugh, thinking about he and Kyo as lover.

 

“ Goodnight.” Toshiya whispered and place a kiss on Kyo forehead.

 

 

 

 

 

Part 20

 

 

The practices ended earlier as Toshiya would be going to the clinic to remove and have a little check up on his face. Toshiya and Kaoru had not been talking to one another since that day where Toshiya rejected Kaoru, or might as well said it was Toshiya who was avoiding the guitarist.

 

“ Kaoru.” Toshiya called, as he approaches the older man as soon as the practice end.

 

Kaoru nearly drop his guitar, was overjoyed by hearing his name being called by the bassist. He don’t even mind if Toshiya going to punch him hard on the face after he reply.

 

“ Yes?” Kaoru answered, trying to be calm.

 

“ Can you accompany me to the clinic, later?” Toshiya asked with a little blushed on his face.

 

Kaoru thought he had heard the wrong thing. Did I hear wrongly, Toshiya asking me to accompany him? Kaoru nearly jumped up, his heart almost pop out from his body. “ Of… of… of course, I’m free… no I mean I’m willing… no I… go with you.” Kaoru was overjoyed.

 

Kyo giggled. Toshiya finally take his advised. This is a good chance to ask Kaoru to accompany him huh… Kyo was laughing to himself. Knowing that these two days, Toshiya was trying to find a way to talk to Kaoru, wanted to tell Kaoru that he was willing to accept him.

 

“ Well at least they finally together.” Kyo muttered.

 

“ Huh? What you saying?” Toshiya asked, thinking that Kyo was talking to him when he walk back to collect his belonging and hears Kyo muttering.

 

“ Oh… nothing. Just enjoy your date.” Kyo grin.

 

Toshiya face reddens and throws the small cushion where he managed to grab from somewhere, directly at Kyo face.

 

“ Can we leave now?” Kaoru asked anxiously, blushing.

 

Toshiya nod and followed behind Kaoru, left the studio together. As soon as the door was close, a smiling Die approaches Kyo, half guessed correctly that Toshiya had decides to accept.

 

“ They finally together?” Die was smiling all the way.

 

“ Not until Toshiya tell Kaoru? You know Kaoru was kind of idiot when come to this type of love thing.” Kyo reply, agreed by Die and both laugh together like idiot.

 

Unknown to Die, Shinya was staring at him. In Shinya mind, Die was just anxious to know whether Toshiya had accepted Kaoru, does he still stand a chance to win the bassist back? Maybe Die would leave him when he recovered? Shinya suddenly think of this.

 

Just killed that bitch…!

 

The breaking sound of Shinya drumstick alert Die.

 

 

The doctor carefully removed the cotton on Toshiya face. Kaoru see the healing mark of the wound, the mark was quite light and the doctor had confirm to them that the mark will disappeared soon but Toshiya must still applied lotion everyday to prevent infection.

 

Kaoru notice that Toshiya mood was high today, properly because the wound did not left down any scar. Anyway, as long as the bassist is happy, Kaoru would be happy too.

 

“ Kaoru, let’s have dinner together?” Toshiya asked suddenly.

 

“ Sure…”

 

 

Kaoru was already contented enough that Toshiya is willing to talk to him again but he never expect Toshiya would suddenly clutch his hand onto his while they walk out of the restaurant.

 

“ Toshiya?” Kaoru surprised. 

 

“ I have to apply the lotion everyday…Mmm… you willing to do it for me huh?”

 

“ Of course if you want.” Kaoru answered directly still not quite understand what Toshiya was trying to say.

 

“ Accompany me for dinner everyday?”

 

“ Of course if you want.”

 

Toshiya pouted.

 

“ If you have another chance, will you still leave me back in the hotel?”

 

Kaoru was stun at the moment wondering why the bassist saying this thing again. “ Toshiya I’m sorry but you must hear my explanation…”

 

Toshiya had enough of this love idiot. “ IF IT WAS NOW WILL YOU STILL LEAVE ME BACK?”

 

“ NO of course I won’t!” Kaoru answered directly thinking that he had anger the bassist again. “ I promised!”

 

“ Okay, then you be my lover from now on!” Toshiya said, blushed.

 

Kaoru was stun wondering did he hear wrongly. Toshiya is willing to be my lover? He accepted me? Kaoru heart was beating faster and faster. He could not control his lip from spreading wide… HE ACCEPTS ME!!

 

“ What are you doing? I leaving without you if you don’t catch up huh.” Toshiya shouted at Kaoru who was still standing still outside the restaurant.

 

“ Totchi wait! YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!” Kaoru exclaimed and run after his lover.

 

 

Next morning.

 

“ Oh Die, I never thought I have teach such a bad child. Never even call to tell that he’s not coming home.” Kyo was giggling. “ Where have you been huh?” Kyo continue, looking at Toshiya, acting to be some sort of angry father.

 

Both Kaoru and Toshiya blushed. They never expect the others had already arrival in the studio so early especially Kyo.

 

Knowing that his lover was shy, Kaoru give a cough hint to the others that practices going to start, don’t make him shout. This is very first time he was extremely happy as his position as the leader in the band… able to make use of it.

 

Die was the first one to felt happy for them. Maybe Shinya would feel better after knowing Toshiya and Kaoru was together. Shinya won’t have to guess on him and Toshiya.

 

During the break, Toshiya approaches Die. Shinya was looking at them, smile to Toshiya when Toshiya look at him. Die saw everything, thinks that Shinya would not mind since he know about Kaoru and Toshiya. Anyway, they were just talking in front of him.

 

“ This is the remix, just add your part.” Toshiya said and pass a piece of paper to Die.

 

“ Okay.” Die simply replies. “ Oh yes… you and Kaoru… all the best to both of you!” Die suddenly remembers. “ And I’m really sorry about pushing you, I’ll explained to you everything if there’s a chance.” Die apologized.  “ I’m just sorry about everything I’ve done.”

 

Toshiya smiled to Die. “ Well everything had passed, forget it! We still friend right, but don’t you dared to hurt my face again.” Toshiya pretend to be warning Die. “ Don’t you dare to destroy my beauty!”  Toshiya added.

 

Die stared at the bassist whom stared back, both broke into laughter.

 

Die suddenly seems to remember of the drummer, afraid that Shinya might starts to think wild about him and Toshiya again but the drummer was still smiling to him when Die look at him.

 

“ Toshiya!” To Die surprise, Shinya call the bassist. “ Can I have a look at the other remix? I wish to change some of my part.” Shinya continue saying while walking to Toshiya.

 

Shinya seem quiet good today, willing to talk to Toshiya and was concentrating on his work. Kaoru and Kyo continue doing their work, believing that Shinya will get well soon as he don’t need to worry too much about Die and Toshiya now. Maybe he had loosen his mental the moment he know Kaoru and Toshiya was together?

 

“ Which remix?” Toshiya asked wanted to find the piece the drummer wanted.

 

“ That one…” Shinya answered in a low tone.

 

“ Which…” Toshiya wanted to ask again when he notice something reflected his eyes.

 

“ This one!” Shinya smiled, holding onto Toshiya. “ This piece.”

 

Die was all the while watching over his lover, saw what had happened. He drops the piece of paper in his hand that the bassist had given him. No voice coming out of him even though he wanted to shout.

 

 “ Go to hell!” Shinya whispered at the bassist ear.

 

Die wanted to stand up, but his leg could move. He wanted to shout for the other attention but no voice came out.

 

“ Shin… Shinya… why?” Toshiya ask, voice-getting weak.

 

Shinya starts to laugh. Slowly he removes the knife from Toshiya stomach, Toshiya slowly sink to the ground, hand still clutching onto the drummer shirt. Shinya laughter was getting hysterical attracting Kaoru and Kyo attention.

 

Kaoru saw the most horrify sight in his life. “ Toshiya…” He voice nearly breakdown.

 

“ What the fuck!” Kyo exclaimed and rush to the bassist.

 

Toshiya was lying on the floor, blood starts to stain his shirt and dripping to the ground. Kaoru and Kyo rush to the bassist side, one trying to stop the bleeding and the other one calling for an ambulance. Die was still sitting stun, unmoved. Shinya was laughing all the way.

 

 

 

 

 

Part 21(end)

 

 

Kaoru and Kyo were waiting nervously outside the emergency room for Toshiya. The bassist had been inside the room for a few hours. Die was accompanying Shinya who had been retained by the police.

 

“ Is Toshiya alright?” Kaoru rush to the doctor immediately, as soon as the doctor came out of the emergency room.

 

The doctor explained to them that Toshiya stab was not really very deep but he had lose lots of blood and a blood transaction had been carry out on him. All the bassist need now was to get more rest and will recover soon in most likely a month time.

 

After hearing what the doctor had said, Kaoru finally set his mind down. His heart had seem to be digging it way out of Kaoru body every second Kaoru wait outside the emergency room for the doctor to come out. He was so afraid that something might happened to his lover, Toshiya weren’t moving at all when they sent him to the hospital.  

 

Kyo left Kaoru behind to take care of the bassist as the doctor only allow one person to stay in the room. Anyway one of them would have to go to the police station to inform Die about the bassist condition and to see how’s the drummer.

 

Kaoru quietly enter the ward where his lover was in. He saw Toshiya lying motionless on the bed, his heart start beating fast again, afraid that something is wrong with the bassist. It was until he felt Toshiya was still breathing that he finally rest a bit but was still alert for whatever going to happened.

 

Kaoru sits on the chair beside his lover, holding onto Toshiya hand, looking tenderly at the bassist. He strokes the soft hair of his lover and felt Toshiya moving a little. It was so great that Toshiya is still alive. Kaoru felt like crying, maybe because he had let go of the worry that his lover going to leave him.

 

“ I’m so scared… you weren’t moving at all just now. I was so scared that you going to leave me…” Kaoru whisper to the sleeping man and a tear dropped onto the bassist hand that Kaoru was holding onto.

 

Kaoru rest his head beside his lover. Now he could not stops the tears from coming out… Kaoru never cry so much ever since he grown up.

 

 

 

Shinya had recovered his sense after taking the medicine that the doctor gave him. He was being lock inside a small room; only a bed was inside the room. Shinya was sitting on the floor, bending his leg and hugging it. He felt so cold, so frighten inside the room alone.

 

“ Die… where are you?” Shinya cried. “ What have I done…? They said I injured someone…?”

 

The door opens up, a policeman and Die was standing there looking at Shinya. Shinya saw his lover and run to him, hugging Die tightly and began to cry. “ What have I done?” Shinya muttered between his sobbing.

 

The policeman locks the door and left the two alone.

 

“ Shinya…” Die didn’t know what should he say now, looking at his lover, he felt pain in his heart.

 

“ Did I injure someone?” Shinya asked, somehow starts to recall what he had do. “ Toshiya?” Shinya voice was shaking, knowing the person he had injure is most properly to be the bassist.

 

Die nod.

 

“ What have I done to him?” Shinya virtually breakdown when he know he is right.

 

Die guide his lover to sit on the bed. “ You stab Toshiya on the stomach…” Die decides to tell his lover the truth; anyway Shinya would get to know sooner or later.

 

Shinya did not utter a word. He was looking blankly at his lover; his eyes were redden and tears drip down uncontrollably. The drummer was trembling when Die embraces him.

 

“ Die… just sent me to any mental hospital, just lock me up… I don’t want to hurt anyone again…”

 

What should I do, Shinya? I cause all this… Toshiya and you are both the victim… it my entire fault.

 

Die was crying, the first time Shinya see his lover crying.

 

 

Die slowly walks back to the hall, Shinya had to be retain until the investigation ended and would properly be sent to mental hospital if he’s find guilt of injuring someone.

 

“ Die!”

 

“ Kyo… How is Toshiya?” Die immediately asks when he sees the man.

 

Kyo tells the guitarist about Toshiya condition and Die finally set part of his mind. At least Toshiya was doing all right, he thinks. He would never forgive himself if something bad happened to the bassist; Shinya would never forgive himself too and would be guilty in his entire life. Kaoru would hate the drummer and Die too… everything would ended if Toshiya really die. 

 

 

Toshiya wakes up the next morning and see Kaoru sleeping with his hand still holding onto the bassist. Kaoru move slightly during his sleep and was awake immediately when he felt Toshiya moving. He look at his lover, worried at first but Toshiya was smiling at him that make him relax.

 

“ What are you smiling at?” Kaoru pouted, knowing the bassist was properly smiling at him.

 

“ You sleeping like a child.” Toshiya giggle a bit but the pain on his stomach ended his giggle.

 

Kaoru was anxious when he sees his lover in pain again. He wanted to call for the doctor but Toshiya stopped him. Kaoru felt more painful than his lover when he sees Toshiya suffering. How he wishes the pain that Toshiya had suffer was on him and not his lover.

 

“ Kaoru?” Toshiya called when he sees the sadness in his lover. “ I’m doing fine, really…” Toshiya trying to console his lover, just then someone knock on the door.

 

“ Mr. Hara Toshimasa?” One of the policeman asked when they enter. “ We like to talk to you about…”

 

 

 

 

“ You can come out now, your charge had been cancel.” The policeman said to Shinya when he opens the door.

 

Shinya follow the policeman and come to a hall where he sees Die and Kyo waiting for him. Die was signing some document before the police return Shinya belonging to him and they left the police station together.

 

“ What happened? Why did they release me?” Shinya ask once they walk out of the place.

 

“ Toshiya had cancel the charge against you, he had told the police that it was just an accident.” Kyo explained.

 

Die had not say a thing to the drummer; all he did was holding his lover hand tightly, somehow Shinya could feel Die hand was shaking. Die was glad that both Shinya and Toshiya were going to be fine, he was most thankful to the bassist for not charging his lover.

 

This morning, Die had go to the hospital when he know that the bassist was awake, he wanted to beg Toshiya to cancel his charge against Shinya but he didn’t because it will be unfair to the bassist. No matter what going to happen, Die had prepared to accept it. Die was overjoyed when Kaoru called him and tells him to fetch the drummer.

 

“ Where are we going?” Shinya asked when they enter the car.

 

“ To the hospital…” Kyo reply and they were quiet for the rest of the journey.

 

I know I must visit Toshiya, I must apologize to him but he’s already kind enough for not charging me, will he willing to see my face again? I nearly killed him…

 

Shinya was clutching onto his pant.

 

 

They reach outside the wardroom and hear laughing sound from inside the room. Die knock onto the room and open it, it was also his first time visiting the bassist since the incident happen. Shinya follow quietly behind the other two men. Toshiya still have the smile on his face when he sees them but Kaoru smile faded when he sees Shinya.

 

“ Seem that you doing fine huh.” Kyo notice the sudden strange atmosphere, was trying to change it.

 

Toshiya giggled. “ Of course, I’m going to recover soon. Kaoru promised to accompany me to Disneyland.” Toshiya also notice it.

 

“ Disneyland?”

 

Kaoru face reddens. The others were trying to keep their laughter. Their stern leader visiting Disneyland, it must be a big joke. Kyo finally laugh out, unable to bear it.

 

“ I glad you’re fine.” Die stops the laughter in the room.

 

Toshiya glance at the man then laugh when he sees how serious Die looks. “ I won’t die so easily.” Toshiya slap himself immediately after he finish saying as he sees how uncomfortable the drummer look.

 

“ Shinya, sorry I didn’t mean it.” Toshiya apologize, knowing the drummer mind a lot.

 

Shinya shake his head vigorously; finally bring up his gut to speak out. Shinya take a step forward but then stop when he sees the protecting look on Kaoru face, he understand it is usual for Kaoru to do so because he had just hurt the man he love. Just as he was going to continue talking, Toshiya cut into his word.

 

“ Come here.” Toshiya said pointing to the bed, asking the drummer to sits there.

 

Toshiya understand what Kaoru was worried about but it was also the best time to make up with the drummer. Toshiya didn’t want the drummer to be avoiding him for the rest of his life. It was now that the bassist finally understands why Shinya had stab him. He had heard from Kaoru and was also concern about the drummer condition.

 

Shinya didn’t do so at first but after a few insisting from the bassist, he obediently sits beside Toshiya. Kaoru was still staring protectively at his lover. Die just pray nothing would go wrong again, anyway Shinya condition was good recently after he know what he had done to the bassist, he had been doing fine in controlling his mood.

 

Shinya apologized as soon as he sits down and didn’t dare to look into the bassist eyes. Toshiya did not blame Shinya at all, he was just feeling sad for the drummer of his mental condition and hope he will get well soon. But he must let Shinya set his mind first, the main problem is not going to let Shinya think there still something between him and Die.

 

“ Oh Shin-chan… I’m going to blame you for my entire life unless you agreed to have a complete treatment huh?” Toshiya nearly shock all the others at first. “ Die said you should go to USA for better treatment, we’ll wait for you to come back and our band need completely ‘good condition’ peoples. I need sometime to recover too…”

 

“ I will go if you really willing to forgive me.” Shinya exclaimed, would do whatever the bassist want him to as long as the bassist forgive him.

 

Die laughed. He didn’t know Toshiya words work so efficiently.

 

“ Mmm… and about Die and me.” Toshiya continued, Die and Shinya wondered what the bassist trying to say. “ You see Shinya, Die dumped me for you. He loves you, you should put in more believe in him.  Die and me would never be together again.” Toshiya was speaking seriously at this moment.

 

“ Yes Shinya! Toshiya and me are just friend…. Mmm good friend, more likely a brother to me.” Die added.

 

“ Anyway, I have KaoKao now. I won’t even give this asshole a chance…” Toshiya grin and stick his tongues out a Die. “ Oh he just doesn’t match my beauty!” Toshiya was trying to make stern drummer laugh.

 

“ Heh! What asshole!” Die screech.

 

“ You an asshole!” Toshiya simply reply pointing the red head, Kyo and Kaoru agreed. “ See Shinya, you must consider again. Find another lover.”

 

“ Hey! You guys ganging up against me.”

 

“ And some more…” Toshiya whispered something at the drummer ear.

 

Die frown, wondering what the bassist is telling his lover. To the others surprise, Shinya finally laughed after hearing what Toshiya say to him.

 

“ Really?” Shinya was smiling, asking for further confirmation of what the bassist told him.

 

Toshiya nodded and both laughing all the way together. “ See, I ask you to consider another lover. How about Kyo?” Toshiya muttered between his laughter. 

 

“ Don’t listen to him Shinya.” Die was looking at his lover with puppy eyes. “ What did he said?”

 

“ SECRET!!” Shinya and Toshiya say together.

 

Die pouted.

 

The wardroom was filled with all sort of noise until a nurse came in and…

 

 

Few days later, Dir en Grey announced that they would be stopping all activity for one year – personally reason!

 

 

~ Shinya and Die.

Went to USA together for Shinya treatment. Die still very much bother by what Toshiya had told his lover; Shinya was still keeping it as secret, not willing to tell Die.

 

In there rented house in USA, at night when they were going to sleep.

 

“ What did Toshiya actually tell you?” Die was still asking, poking at his lover back.

 

“ Maybe I should really consider of another lover if you want to keep on asking?” Shinya warned, partly already irritated by Die.

 

“ Oh Shinya…”

 

Shinya giggled, remembering of what Toshiya had told him suddenly.

 

 

~ Kyo and Gackt

Very loving… Mmm still arguing over their position matter. Kyo wants to be the ‘man’ at least once but Gackt refused, always ended up quarreling but will make up the very next day and history repeat again. Maybe because of this a third party coming up between them…

 

“ I WANT TO XXX YOU!!” Kyo exclaimed.

 

“ No…” Gackt -- =p

 

 

~ Kaoru and Toshiya

Superglue! One word to describe, always sticking together. Toshiya had moved into Kaoru apartment and was now enjoying their’ honeymoon’, not caring of the others death or alive.

 

Toshiya recovered fully in two months time. They start writing new song, preparing for Dir en Grey to form back, Toshiya was complaining about Kaoru workaholic again. (He’s is! Now then you know huh? ^__^)

 

Toshiya is going on solo after Kyo and Kaoru. (That’s what I pray for… Totchi is going solo. @___@ I like to hear him sing!)

 

 

“ Heard that Shinya and Die get married in USA?”

 

“ Really?”

 

“ It does recognize there, man get marry.”

 

Toshiya eyes redden. Kaoru getting panic…  “ Aright, we do the same!” Kaoru was trying to comfort his lover.

 

“ Wah… you’re not romantic at all! You don’t even propose to me.” Toshiya was crying and ran out of the room.

 

“ Totchi?”     

 

Well, few days after that, Kaoru and Toshiya appeared in front of Die and Shinya rented house in USA.

 

~~~

One year later.

 

Dir en Grey come back together and held their concert in Tokyo dome.  (I must write this! Dir en Grey will always be together!)

 

Ø       The End.

[5/7/02]

 

 

 

Let’s go to America!

~ Deep, deep special 3

 

 

Someone was continually pressing the doorbell. Die curse, pulling his heavy body down from the bed and drag himself to the door at the first floor. His lover was still sleeping soundly, not caring about the doorbell. It had been six months since they had come to America for Shinya treatment and the drummer condition was recovering fast.

 

“ Coming!” Die yelled, cursing the person pressing the bell.

 

Die yawn as he opens the door, his eyes widen suddenly when he see Kaoru and Toshiya standing outside. Kaoru was the one pressing the bell and Toshiya was smiling all the way, properly was overjoyed that he was in America.

 

“ Good Morning! Time to get up!” Toshiya exclaimed. “ Where’s Shinya?”

 

“ Do you know what time is it?” Die yawned again.

 

Toshiya was already nowhere to be seen when Die turn around after locking the door. Kaoru sighed, knowing that his lover was just too excited. Die didn’t care anyway, he drag himself to the sofa and fall asleep soon.

 

 

Toshiya ran upstairs and finds the drummer sleeping soundly. He wanted to give him a surprise, slowly enter the room and jump onto the bed.

 

“ Shinya!” Toshiya exclaimed. “ Wake up and welcome me!”

 

Shinya open his eyes wide thinking some disastrous strike. His eyes brighten up when he sees the bassist, they hold each other hand like little kids and call out each other name. Kaoru was standing outside the room, sweatdrop, wondering when the two had become such good friend.

 

Die awake suddenly, Shinya had just getting better from his mental condition, what if the bassist excite him again. Die doesn’t want thing to get worse again and what the hell is Kaoru and Toshiya doing in USA? Die rush upstairs to his room and see Kaoru standing outside the room.

 

“ When did you arrival? Why didn’t you give us a call? Why…” Shinya was busy asking the bassist who was busy answering; both did not care about their lover who is standing outside the room looking at them in surprise.

 

Shinya and Toshiya was chatting all the way, not bothering about Die and Kaoru, until they both fall asleep together on the bed.

 

 

The next morning, they were having breakfast together when Toshiya suddenly ask the drummer about Die and him register for married in USA. Shinya drop the newspaper in his hand, blushed.

 

“ He actually came for this.” Kaoru simply explained.

 

Toshiya pinch his lover, making a face to him. “ That’s mean you DO not come for this?” Toshiya pouted. “ You didn’t even propose to me… you didn’t even give me a ring or anything… I know now! You don’t love me!” Toshiya was still upset over Kaoru being so unromantic.

 

“ Toshiya, it not like that.” Kaoru trying to comfort his lover who gets upset by what he had say. “ I buy you anything you want.”

 

“ Don’t touch me! It not the matter of what I want, it the matter of what you going to buy for me.” Toshiya pretend to cry. “ Shinya let’s go shopping, Kaoru going to pay for everything I buy since he’s so generous to buy whatever thing I want.”

 

Before Kaoru can react, Toshiya had already pulled Shinya out of the house. Die laugh, knowing that Kaoru is going to be broke this time. 

 

 

Toshiya and Shinya were carrying bags and bags of thing within an hour of shopping. They were now sitting down resting and having a cups of coffee, chatting.

 

“ So you and Die really get register married?”

 

“ Actually it all because he was being bothers by the thing you told me. He was afraid that I really want to find another lover so he drag me to register for married.”

 

“ But you did agreed didn’t you or he can’t force you either.” Toshiya giggled.

 

Shinya take a slip of coffee.

 

“ Did you tell Die what I have tells you?”

 

Shinya shakes his head, putting down his cups of coffee. “ I can’t possibly let him know that you said his is not as good as Kaoru when come to sex.” Shinya laugh.

 

Toshiya broke out laughing.

 

“ Aren’t you Toshiya of Dir en Grey?” Someone asked, approaching them.

 

Toshiya looked up and sees a good-looking man was talking to them. It was quiet strange that someone would eventually recognize them in America and this man was speaking good Japanese. So he’s some kind of fan from Japan?

 

“ Yes, I’m am and you are?” Toshiya politely reply, giving his gorgeous smile, not wanting to lose to the man.

 

“ I’m Taka.” The man smiled back to Toshiya. “ I’m the vocalist of La’cryma Christi.”

 

Toshiya finally recognize the man. He politely stand up and bow to the man and they exchange their greeting. They were showing out their most attracting smile all the way, properly not wanted to lose to either one.

 

“ You are Shinya-chan, if I’m not wrong.” Taka turns and greets Shinya.

 

“ Nice to meet you.” Shinya reply.

 

“ It great to meet two beauty here.” Taka gives another charming smiled. “ What’re you two doing here?”

 

The three sat down and starts chatting, glad to meet someone who shared the same interest in America. Taka was actually on holiday here and was doing some shopping when he sees Toshiya whom he really admires.

 

Toshiya and Taka seem to have a comment topic and was enjoying each other company. Since Toshiya was still mad at Kaoru for being so unromantic, he decides to keep his new make friend accompany the next few days.   

 

 

Kaoru didn’t know where his lover was going or with who for the first two day. All he knows was the bassist properly angry with him was trying to ignore him.

 

The third day, Kaoru was getting frustrated for being ignored by his lover. They come here for holiday and should be enjoying their shopping trip or whatever together and not Toshiya going out alone.

 

Kaoru was rolling all over the sofa, sighing all time. Toshiya had gone out early in the morning, Shinya and Die had just came home from the drummer treatment and he was the only one who had been doing noting for the three day. 

 

“ Totchi where are you.” Kaoru grumble.

 

Die look at his friend, kind of irritate by his grumbling. He didn’t know Kaoru was someone like that; all he knows was the stern leader of Dir en Grey who is always serious and a workaholic.

 

“ Do you know whom Toshiya with?” Die asks, as he pulls Shinya into the kitchen, not wanting Kaoru to overheard them.

 

“ We just make a new friend, I think Toshiya is with him now.” Shinya was busy packing the can food they had bought. “ Taka, the vocalist of La’cryma.”

 

“ Taka? Your friend too… What kind of person is he… he look like a flirt.” Die was getting anxious.

 

“ Hey! I’m right here standing in front of you. I didn’t go out with him.” Shinya was annoyed for Die getting so easy panic recently. “ Anyway he’s more interested in Toshiya.” Shinya added, wanted to let Die calm down.

 

Kaoru was standing behind them, had overheard the last part of Die and Shinya conversation. (Since when did he appear ^__^; Like a ghost)  “ What interest in Toshiya? Who?” Kaoru was shrieking.

 

Die and Shinya covered their ear. It’s the same powerful Dir en Grey nor leader, Kaoru special shriek.

 

 

Toshiya enter the room he shared with Kaoru. His lover was sleeping, Toshiya thought, as Kaoru was covering his head with the blanket. Toshiya quietly put down his belonging and went into the bathroom.

 

Kaoru remove the blanket and sits up from the bed. Looking at the time, it was quite late now and his lover had just come back. Remembering that his lover was actually out with another guy make Kaoru furious and jealous.

 

Toshiya gulped when he came out of the bathroom and saw Kaoru still awake. The older man was staring at him when he walks around him.

 

“ Where have you been?” Kaoru asked suddenly.

 

“ None of your business.”

 

Kaoru get really annoyed this time. He pulled the bassist onto the bed and harshly grip onto the bassist hand holding it up above the bassist head. “ What do you mean by none of my business!”

 

“ Let go of me.” Toshiya yelled, trying to struggle off Kaoru grip. “ It hurt!”

 

“ Tell me! Where have been? Who are you with?” Kaoru insist of knowing the answer from his lover, didn’t know that his sudden action had frighten the bassist.

 

“ I with my friend, we have been staying at his friend pub all the while.”

 

“ The whole day?”

 

Toshiya nod. Kaoru let go of his grip when Toshiya starts to cry, just realizing how fierce he was to his lover earlier. Kaoru bend down, placing a kiss on his lover. “ Sorry…” He whispered at Toshiya ear, embracing the bassist.

 

“ You were so fierce…”

 

“ I’m sorry Totchi, I’m just getting jealous…” Kaoru explained.

 

“ Jealous?” Toshiya was surprise that Kaoru was actually jealous over him.

 

Kaoru face reddens. “ Can’t I?” He gently lift up Toshiya chin kiss it, and again until he reach Toshiya lips.

 

Kaoru deepen their kiss, gently guide Toshiya to lie down on the bed and move on top of the bassist. Toshiya grasp onto his lover hair as Kaoru start to move his hand around Toshiya body, stopping at the nipple, pinching it slightly. Toshiya gave out a sound moan but cover his mouth afraid that Die and Shinya might hers him.   

 

“ I love you…” Kaoru murmur and he move his kiss down the bassist beautiful body.

 

Toshiya was trying to control his voice but Kaoru pull Toshiya hand away. “ I want to hear your voice…” Kaoru whispered. Toshiya blush.

 

Kaoru hand moves to Toshiya length and start to stroke it, another hand reach the bassist opening, inserting into the bassist, and slowly widening the hole.

 

“ Ah… Kaoru…” Toshiya cried.

 

Kaoru manhood had already harden, he hint Toshiya and the bassist obediently spread out his leg allowing his lover to move between him. Kaoru lift the bassist leg up and position himself, waiting for Toshiya to be ready.

 

“ I love you Totchi…” Kaoru bend down, kissing Toshiya before he trust into his lover.

 

Toshiya cried out when his lover trust into him, but the pain turn into pleasure as the trust was getting faster and faster. Toshiya finger was digging onto Kaoru back, leaving down nail mark and pain for Kaoru but he did not care, knowing that the pain his lover was having was more than his.

 

“ Kaoru… Kao… Ah…”

 

“ Totchi…”

 

They were calling at each other name, excited, until they finally reach their climax. “ I love you… Totchi… love you.” Kaoru cried before ending his last trust and lay flat on his lover, both grasping for air.

 

After a while, Kaoru move beside his lover, letting Toshiya head to rest on his shoulder. He embraces his lover waist bringing Toshiya near him and places a kiss on the bassist forehead before they fall asleep.

 

 

“ I think they are doing fine.” Die grin, talking to his lover.

 

Shinya agreed, face still blushing. They had been standing outside Kaoru and Toshiya room from the very moment Toshiya went into the room. They were afraid that Kaoru and Toshiya might get into a fight but after hearing those moaning sound, they don’t think their friend were fighting.

 

“ Let’s go back to sleep.” Shinya whisper, pulling Die with him not wanting to alert Kaoru and Toshiya.

 

“ Sleep?” Die exclaimed softly. “ You can still sleep… after hearing those…”

 

“ I want to SLEEP!” Shinya reply directly, knowing what his lover want.

 

“ Oh Shinya… please huh?” Die pled.

 

Shinya ignored his lover and went back into his room. Few minutes later, Shinya was throwing Die out of the room. You guys should guess what happened huh. ^__^

 

 

“ Good morning.” Kaoru say when Toshiya wakes up.

 

Toshiya smiled to his lover and greet him back. Just then he seem to remember something, making him sitting up of the bed instantly. Kaoru was surprise by his lover, following the bassist sitting up on the bed.

 

“ What’s wrong?” Kaoru asked concern.

 

“ I’ve left my handphone with Taka.”

 

Kaoru frown.

 

“ You see, I need my phone back… I need to meet him up.” Toshiya explaining to his lover hoping that the man would not get angry (jealous) again.

 

“ I buy you a new one?” Kaoru pouted, not so willing to let his lover meet up with that whatever Taka.

 

“ Kaoru!” Toshiya pretend to be angry. “ All my friend contact number is IN MY PHONE MEMORY!!!” The bassist exclaimed.

 

Kaoru had no choice since he did not want to upset or quarrel with his lover again. “ I go with you then.” Kaoru insisted.

 

Toshiya chuckle, didn’t know his lover can become such a jealous man…

 

 

They went downstairs and found Die was still sleeping on the sofa, wondering what going on with their friend. (Die won’t get thrown out if you two weren’t so LOVING yesterday night!! ^__^;) Shinya was preparing breakfast in the kitchen. They had their breakfast before they went to meet ‘Kaoru rival’ Taka.

 

 

Someone was waving to Toshiya when they walk to the café. Toshiya waved back, smiling. Kaoru pouted. Kaoru had been staring at the person when his figure appears in front of Kaoru. Kaoru was looking stern all the way when they walk toward the person.

 

“ Good morning Totchi.” Taka greeted. “ And this is…” Taka was referring to Kaoru although he already knows who Kaoru is.

     

Totchi? You dared to call him Totchi… in front of me!

 

Kaoru curse the man. Toshiya sweatdrop.

 

“ Good morning. This is Kaoru.” Toshiya introduces the two ‘atrocious’ looking man.

 

So it is you huh… Toshiya lover…

 

“ Oh you are the GREAT leader of Dir en Grey, you just look so DIFFERENT from the stage.” Taka says sarcastically.

 

“ So you are the bassist or no… drummer? Mmm whatever of what band huh?” Kaoru purposely act, as he did not know where Taka is from.

 

Toshiya laugh nervously.

 

“ Nice to meet you.” Both Taka and Kaoru say together, shaking their hand, which was actually squeezing each other hand. Still having their professional smile on their face.

 

“ Ta… Taka-san… can I have my phone back?”

 

Taka and Kaoru finally let go of their hand, both rubbing their now burning pain hand behind their back, still having their smiled on the face.

 

“ Of course you can have it back Totchi.” Taka slightly steps in front of Kaoru covering the man.

 

Totchi! Call him that again…

 

Kaoru was glaring at Taka as Toshiya take his phone from Taka.

 

“ Since you have got your phone back, let’s go now.” Kaoru pulled his lover with him, not even letting the bassist have any time to thanks or say goodbye to Taka. “ Sorry… eh what your name… oh never mind whatever, Totchi and I going to catch a movie.” Kaoru deliberately say.

 

Taka grin, an idea strikes him. “ Oh a movie? How about letting me joining in, I love movie.” Taka pretended. “ Sure you would not mind Totchi huh?” Taka know that Toshiya would agreed cause the bassist won’t really let him be alone since he already ask.

 

Toshiya smiled nervously, look at his lover and Taka. The two men was obviously glaring at each other now. “ Well… what do you say Kaoru?” Toshiya asked, sweatdrop.

 

Kaoru: $@#&&$%

 

Taka: OH hohohohoho >__<

 

 

 

Toshiya and Kaoru trip ended in one week. Toshiya was enormously mad at his lover, as Kaoru had totally forgotten about their main purpose of coming to America. Their last night in America, Toshiya have to remind him about their purpose of coming but Kaoru did not even go and get a ring or anything for Toshiya or at least propose to the bassist, which was driving Toshiya crazy.

 

Toshiya was staying in Shinya room the last night in America, crying the whole night.  “ Wah… Shinya… I know he don’t love me at all!” Toshiya was complaining the whole night.

 

In Kaoru room, Die had kick his friend to sleep on the floor for causing him to be kick out of his room and had to listen to the sobbing and complaining the whole night.

 

“ Totchi…?” Kaoru: ^__^;;; “ I did love you….!”

 

 

On the plane, Toshiya still refuse to talk to Kaoru. Kaoru was thinking hard to ask for the bassist forgiveness when someone appears in front of them with a bouquet of flower in his hand.

 

“ Totchi! I know you’ll be returning to Japan so I had bought the same flight ticket.” Taka was smiling at the bassist who looks surprise. “ This flower is for you! This the only thing I brought back with me other than my wallet.”

 

Kaoru was still trying to look from behind the bouquet of flower.

 

“ You’re so romantic… Taka thank you, I love this flower.” Toshiya cried.

 

Toshiya was sitting in between the two men. During the whole flight, Toshiya had been chatting with Taka, ignoring his lover.

 

“ Totchi…?” Kaoru would sometime pulled his lover sleeve but Toshiya pull away, still angry with him.

 

Toshiya: HUH >_< maybe it not Shinya who should change another lover!

 

Kaoru: ;__;

 

 

The End

 

 

 

Back Together

(Deep, deep special 4)

 

 

Kyo skip along the corridor heading to the studio, humming some tune as he goes along until he reach the studio door. He heard some noise inside, Kyo puzzle for a while; there should not be anyone around at this time. He moved his ear nearer listening to the other side of the door. “ Stop it… Kao… ah… don’t Kaoru stop it…” Some giggling sound was heard before Kyo recognize the voice was from Toshiya.

 

Kyo smirk, guessing correctly what his friend was doing inside the studio. An evil grin appeared on the vocalist face, having thought of some evil idea. Kyo waited outside the studio for some time until he was sure enough that his friend was getting ‘HIGH’ inside and he bump into the studio.  

 

“ TOSHIYA!! YOU”RE BACK FROM USA!” Kyo exclaimed.

 

Toshiya and Kaoru were dumbfounded for a while staring at Kyo in shocked. Kyo was sniggering all the way, seeing the expression on his friend face. “ Ohh… you still look so sexy!” Kyo chuckled. “ Your butt look nice…”

 

Kaoru frown as he quickly gets off his lover, putting on his shirt. His member was still in semi harden condition and Toshiya was still… well o_______< but they could not continue with their vocalist around. Kaoru curse… just as something came into his mind. “ He sees your naked body before?” Kaoru anxiously ask his lover.

 

Toshiya pouted not bothering to answer this question, instead he turn to Kyo and glared at the man. “ IT HAD BEEN 2 MONTH SINCE I’M BACK FROM USA!!” Toshiya shriek.

 

Kyo and Kaoru cover their ear, shock by their bassist voice. “ I didn’t know you have a high pitch voice!” Kaoru slowly put down his hand when he knows his lover had tranquil down. Kyo agreed with the older man. “ Maybe you should be the vocalist.” The vocalist was still grinning.

 

The bassist glared at the two men.

 

Kyo was sitting on the chair with his leg up on the table waiting for his two friends, rocking the chair as he whistle a new melody. Half an hour later, Kaoru and Toshiya returns to the studio after they go to the toilet respectively, finishing whatever ‘unfinished job’ of their. “ What’re you guys doing here today?” Kyo stops his whistling.

 

Kaoru gather the papers on the table, still putting a frown on his face. “ To remix this new song.” The guitarist passes the paper and a demo tape to the vocalist. “ I want to record it as soon as Die and Shinya is back.” 

 

“ You’ve filled in the lyrics?” The vocalist look at their leader with watery eyes as the demo tape was play. “ You’re snatching away my job.” Kyo stood up and run to the bassist.

 

Kaoru ignored the shorter man knowing clearly he was just putting on an act. Toshiya was giggling as Kyo jump onto him and the two ended up lying on the floor with Kyo on top. Another evil grin was spotted on the short man. “ What a prefect position.” Kyo starts to unbutton the bassist shirt.

 

“ Oh please don’t, let go of me my lord.” Toshiya was laughing all the way as he continue to act with Kyo. “ Help KaoKao, he’s going to rape me!”

 

Kaoru ignored his two crazy bandmate, trying to concentrate on his work. Knowing that his lover was not going to do anything, Toshiya pouted. “ Kaoru…” Toshiya trying to attract his lover attention again but was still being ignored.

 

“ No fun!” Kyo finally give up knowing that Kaoru was not going to do anything. “ Ahhhh…” The very next moment he yelled as Toshiya pulled him back suddenly when he was getting up.

 

Attracted by the vocalist scream, Kaoru look back and sees his lover and the vocalist was eventually kissing, which Kyo seem to be forced. Kaoru frown even more, his lover was trying to get his attention but he had ignored him, so was this revenge to him for ignoring the bassist? “ Toshiya…” Kaoru tries to stops his lover action but was being ignored of course and what make him angrier was that Kyo starts to seem rather enjoying.

 

Kaoru walks to them with shaking fist and he smacks Kyo on the head. “ Enjoying huh!?”

 

“ Ouch! It not my fault!” Kyo protest, rubbing his head.

 

Toshiya giggled, his plan to get his lover attention had work. Kaoru was now 100% jealous, the bassist knows clearly, watching as his lover walking back to his seat.

 

“ Ne Totchi, are you free later?” Kyo was still rubbing his head. “ There’s a place I wanted to go later, accompany me?”

 

Toshiya eyes brighten up. “ What place?” The bassist was curious on what kind of wired place is Kyo bringing him to this time. “ Sure! I want to go!” Toshiya looks at his lover to get response. “ Anyway you still have work to do didn’t you KaoKao.”

 

Kaoru had been sticking close to his lover ever since the TAKA incident, but now since Kyo was with him, the vocalist can watch over his lover for him. “ Don’t come home too late and Kyo…”

 

“ I know! I know! Watch over Totchi for you, don’t let any SUSPECT get near him.” Kyo cut off Kaoru sentence, had already guessed what the older man was trying to tell him as it was not the first time he had been told that.   

 

“ Bring you some supper.” Toshiya happily kiss his lover chin.

 

 

 

Kyo stops his car in front of a building. The bassist was wondering why his friend had brought him to a place like this where there don’t seem to have any ‘wired place’. Toshiya follows Kyo up the building, finding the place look alike their studio; thinking was Kyo meeting Gackt here.

 

“ You’re meeting Gackt-san?”

 

Kyo shake his head, just then someone interrupt their conversation. “ Kyo you are here!” An even shorter man was walking toward them; smiling at Kyo but Toshiya notice a dagger-like glared was given to him within a second from that man.

 

“ Let me introduces.” Kyo didn’t notice anything. “ This is Levin and this is my bandmate Toshiya.”

 

“ Nice to meet you.” Toshiya said first.

 

“ TOTCHI!!!” The three men were shock by the sudden high pitch shrieking whereby Levin already know whom the shrieking came from, sweatdrop.

 

“ Ta… Taka?” Toshiya was surprise to see him again.

 

“ I’m so happy to see you again, where’s your that Koi, Mmm… forget his name.” Taka happily held onto the bassist hands.

 

“ Koi?” Levin asked. “ You have one?” The shortest man was smiling at Toshiya now, knowing that Toshiya was not Kyo lover.

 

Toshiya smiled back and nod to Levin blushed, whereby his mind was wondering now that what is wrong with Kyo and Gackt and this Levin was obliviously have something for Kyo. Toshiya look at Kyo whom give him a silly grin and the bassist smiled nervously himself too.

 

“ Ahem…nice to see you again Taka.” Kyo instantly grab Taka hand away from the bassist. “ Ha… ha…”

 

“ I thought I just see you yesterday.” Taka sulked.

 

^__^;;

 

 

Toshiya and Kyo wave goodbye to the other two after they had their dinner together. Levin and Taka were be heading back to their work place and Kyo was sending the bassist safely back to Kaoru.

 

“ What all this?” Toshiya asked as soon as they enter the car. “ Gackt-san and you?”

 

Kyo starts the engine. “ That’s why I had asked you out today.” The car drove off as Kyo starts telling the bassist what was going on between Gackt, Levin and him.

 

“ What!? Just because Gackt refuse to let you take him?” Toshiya was extremely surprise by Kyo. “ I know you always wanted to be the ‘man’ and Levin let you do so, but you telling me that you actually love Gackt more after you and Levin…?” Toshiya was getting upset, having remembered about his past relation with Die and Shinya. “ This is not going to be good, believe me Kyo. You would hurt them.”

 

“ But Gackt already know about it and he was so mad at me.” They had reached Kaoru apartment by now. “ Levin know I love Gackt but he did not mind if I love him or not, all he want is to stay with me.”

 

“ Please decide properly. Apologize to Gackt-san if you want to be with him, I’m sure he would forgive you or if you decide to be with Levin then tell Gackt-san.” Toshiya was a bit angry with the vocalist. “ Don’t take love for granted.”

 

“ Toshiya you’re angry?”

 

“ I’m going back now, please think through who you love most.” Toshiya get off the car. “ Kyo please don’t tell Kaoru that we had see Taka, I don’t want him to get fret again.”

 

Kyo nodded.

 

Seeing the vanishing back of the bassist, Kyo sighed, Toshiya had grown a lot. He was once a spoilt brat who does not care so much about others as long as he is happy but now he would show concern for others especially his love one. Well maybe he is still a spoil brat now but with a different internal.

 

But what wrong with Kaoru knowing about Taka?

 

 

“ I’m home!” Toshiya enter the apartment and see Kaoru sitting on the sofa with papers all around him. “ You have not finish your work?”

 

Kaoru smiled at his lover. “ I was trying to do something while waiting for you. Have you enjoy yourself today?” Kaoru lead his lover to take a sit beside him.

 

Toshiya stare at the loving Kaoru as tears starts forming in his eyes. “ Wah KaoKao…. You always so good to me.” Toshiya embrace the older man tightly.

 

“ What happened?” Kaoru was surprise with his lover sudden outburst. “ Something is wrong?” Kaoru asked anxiously.

 

Toshiya shakes his head vigorously. “ Nothing, it just that I realized how much I was being love by you. You love me huh? Do you huh?” Toshiya is looking at his lover with puppy eyes for an answer.

 

“ Of course I love you Totchi, you always the first one in my heart.” Kaoru kiss his lover on the forehead.

 

“ Wahhhhhhhhhhhhh…”

 

“ Shh… Shh… I always love you…. Don’t cry…” Kaoru pat his lover on the back while hugging him, comforting the man.

 

 

 

Kyo stops his car, switching off the engine as he took out his mobile. After thinking what Toshiya had reminded him, Kyo had make up his mind who is the one he actually love. It may be cruel to the other person but it would be fair to both of them like what Toshiya had said.

 

“ Hello?” Someone pick up the phone. “ Is that you Kyo?”

 

“ Hai.”

 

“ What’s up?”

 

“ Levin I have something to tell you.”

 

“ What is it? Shall we meet somewhere?”

 

“ …”

 

“ I’m sorry but after thinking through I…” Levin was cutting off Kyo words.

 

“ You have decides to go back to your lover?” Levin voice was shaking. “ Don’t even consider letting me stay with you even that I don’t mind?”

 

“ I’m sorry Levin but it would be unfair to both of you if I agreed to you.”

 

“ Why Kyo? You know I don’t mind…” Sobbing sound was heard. “ I love you Kyo…”

 

“ I’m sorry Levin, really sorry about everything I done to you. I would do anything to make up for you, forgive me.”

 

“ …”

 

“ Levin?”

 

“ It Okays Kyo, I understand. I’m also sorry for giving you so much trouble.” Levin was trying to stop his voice from trembling, not wanting to let Kyo blame too much on himself. “ Are we still friend then?”

 

“ Of course, you’ll always be my friend and I’ll do anything I can for you.”

 

“ Thanks you.”

 

“ Levin are you really alright?”

 

“ Ya, I’ll be fine. Good night Kyo.”

 

“ Good Night…”

 

Sorry Levin…

 

 

Kyo get down the car and went up the building where Gackt was living. No matter what happened, Kyo wants to apologize to his lover, even if Gackt would have beaten him up or anything.

 

Kyo press the bell several times when finally someone answered the door. “ Gackt…” Kyo stopped as he sees the person who answers the door was not his lover but was a woman.

 

“ Looking for Gackt?” The woman asked.

 

“ Never mind. I’ll come another day.” Kyo did not know what he was saying, all he know now was his heart was aching and this may be what Levin was feeling.

 

“ Who is it sis?( does Gackt-sama have a sister?)” Gackt appears at the door. “ Kyo?” Surprise to see the vocalist.

 

Sis? His sister? So it was not his new girlfriend or what…

 

“ I’m leaving soon, come in.” The woman pulled Kyo inside the house. “ You’re Gackt friend or lover.”

 

Kyo jaw nearly drops. “ Emm… I’m Kyo, Gackt…” Kyo politely introduce himself. 

 

“ He’s my lover…” Kyo and the woman stare at Gackt, surprise.

 

“ Oh I see. Okay I’m leaving now. Goodbye.” The woman blows a kiss to both Kyo and Gackt as she close the door.

 

The door went close. Gackt and Kyo suddenly realize they are now alone in the apartment, wondering what they should said to one another. “ Emm…” They said together and stopped.

 

“ What you want to said?” Gackt asked.

 

Kyo lowered his head, staring on the floor. “ You still admit me as your lover?”

 

Gackt move to the sofa, sitting down. He did not answer Kyo question, making the later anxious. After a while, Kyo give up waiting aimlessly and move to the sofa, taking a sit beside Gackt pulling the man face facing him. “ I said I’m terribly sorry for what I have done! Can you forgive me?” Kyo was looking serious and determined.

 

Gackt burst out laughing, couldn’t hold his laughter any longer. He did not expect Kyo would do such a thing and the serious look on his lover face was driving him crazy. Kyo pouted. “ Why are you laughing?”

 

Gackt was still laughing, maybe consider frantically now.

 

“ I have clearly told Levin that the one I love is you! I LOVE YOU!! See! You can either beat me up to smooth your anger and forgive me or you can just tell me that you don’t want me anymore and I would leave now!” Kyo was blushing hard.

 

Gackt laughter was getting more and more >___<

 

“ Fine! I leave!” Kyo was getting mad at Gackt reaction.

 

“ Wait…” Gackt pulled the man back. “ I didn’t know you are so straightforward…” Gackt was trying to control his laughter now. “ I was angry with you of course but… but how could I still be angry with you in this situation?” Gackt was still laughing.

 

“ Forgive me or forget it? Chose either one now.” Kyo poked at his lover.

 

“ Huh? Threatening me now?” Gackt make a face and pulled Kyo toward him suddenly. “ Let me teach you a lesson for betraying me, you will never going to forget this.”

 

Kyo : t__t;

 

Gackt carry his lover up and throw him onto the bed when they enter the room. Kyo yell in protest but his lover was already on top of him, moving his hand up and down, removing every single piece of clothing on Kyo as he place kissing on him. “ You will always be the ‘woman’!” Gackt whispered.

 

“ What?” Kyo exclaimed but was already too late to stop his lover. “ Gackt…….”

 

Gackt : ^o^ I’m always the winner!

 

Kyo give up struggling, sighing as he let his lover do whatever he wants since he was at wrong first. But deep inside Kyo, there was a voice exclaiming “ I WANT TO BE THE MAN!”

 

 

 

The ringing sound from the phone had goes on for some time when Toshiya lazily move from under his blanket to answer the call. Kaoru was in the bathroom taking a shower after they had finish their ‘JOB’ earlier on. “ Who is it?” Toshiya grumble.

 

“ It’s me.”

 

“ Kyo?” Toshiya was surprise to hear his friend voice. “ What up?”

 

“ Just to thanks you for your advice and maybe your anger earlier on, if not I would still be trouble between Gackt and Levin.” Kyo yawn as he said. “ Common… babe…” Another voice was heard.

 

“ You are with Gackt now huh?” Toshiya recognize the voice. “ Everything alright now? So fast?” The bassist giggled.

 

“ Yes… yes and all this had to thank you spoilt brat.”

 

“ Hey!” Toshiya sits up from the bed, protesting, as Kaoru walks out from the bathroom smiling at him. “ Who is it?” Kaoru asked softly. “ It that girly KYO.” The bassist purposely said out aloud for the vocalist to hear it. Kaoru laugh, sitting on the bed now beside his lover.

 

“ Who is girly!?”

 

“ Oh nothing… I’m going to sleep now… bye.” Toshiya hangs up the phone giggling, without waiting for the reply from Kyo, knowing that Kyo would be extremely >__<.

 

“ You better watch out Totchi!” Kyo was fuming at the other side of the phone.

 

“ Another round babe…” Gackt pulled his lover back onto the bed.

 

“ Hey, how many time do you want!?” Kyo (; __ ;)

 

Following by, Kyo had taken his revenge on the bassist as he purposely led Taka to meet up with Toshiya, nearly causing another disaster from Kaoru, whereby the incident had lead to Kaoru being more ‘STICK’ to his lover.        

 

 

----------------------

 

“ Can all of you make a simple introducing of yourself?” The interviewer asks.

 

“ I’m the guitarist of Dir en Grey, Kaoru.”

 

“ I’m Kyo.”

 

“ I’m Toshiya, bassist of the band.”

 

“ Die here, nice to see you guys again.”

 

“ I’m Shinya, drummer of Dir en grey.”

 

“ Thanks for the introducing, let get to the topic. What would Dir en Grey be doing now after resting for the whole year?”

 

“ We will be holding a concert!” Kaoru answered…

 

 

 

The End~

By Tsmrhara

[5/8/02]

 

 

 

[Moon Child] Side story 5

 

Kaoru moved around the room, a frown on his face as trying to find something to do after he had finish with all the paperwork. He looks at the clock now ten in the morning, Kaoru seat on the chair thumping his feet crossing his arm and stare directly at the door since he really cannot find anything else to do. “ I thought these guy would have grow up after so many thing had happened in the band.” Kaoru start grumbling to himself as he looks at the clock again. “ Seem that they are getting worse!”

 

Not only that Kyo was late for practice, which he always used to be in the past. Now even Shinya was late and not to mention of Die and Toshiya who had also used to be late often but this time was indeed ridiculous for the whole band other than himself to be late for the first practice after whole long year of resting. He had regret not pulling Toshiya along with him in the morning just because his lover beg him to let him sleep for a while and promised to be at practice on time. Kaoru must be crazy to believe what Toshiya had said knowing that his lover must still be on bed now.

 

“ Didn’t they know practice should start at eight?” Kaoru tap his feet louder annoyed.

 

Kaoru don’t even bother to call them one by one now knowing it still were not do any help after so many years of ‘experience’ as the leader. He had Shinya to help him in the passed but now it seem that another problem child had occur. Frowning, grumbling and finally moment later Kaoru heard some noise; he glared at the door seeing who is the ‘earlier’ one.

 

“ Good morning.” Kaoru greeted sarcastically still sitting on the chair facing the door.

 

Shinya and Die sweatdrop knowing how angry their leader is from the man look. “ …Kao… Kaoru-san… good morning.” Shinya tries to greet back as his heart was beating wildly. Die has a nervous grin on his face. “ You see Kaoru, Shinya and I…” He tries to find some excused.

 

“ I really ‘GLAD’ you guy are here now.” Kaoru emphasize the word. “ Keep your excused and get to work.”

 

Die and Shinya smiled awkwardly and move to the other side of the room afraid that Kaoru might explode and struggler them. They see Kaoru still staring at the door with crossed arm; maybe they were still being lucky not to be the last one to arrival. “ If Kyo was last, he’s doom but if it Totchi then it be alright.” Die whispered to his lover. Both men were quiet surprise that there is still someone being later than they have.

 

“ What are we supposed to do now Die?” Shinya whispered looking around to find that everything had been done.

 

“ Just sit, keep quiet and waited.”

 

Shinya nodded.

 

Footsteps were approaching the studio and the door swing open soon. Die and Shinya give a “ AH,” noise when it was Toshiya at the door and a “oh” referring to Kyo is doom this time. “ Toshiya…” Kaoru starts his nagging toward the man but with a softer tune. The nagging soon stops with the bassist reddening eyes glancing at Kaoru pleading. Its Toshiya tactics and he always win.

         

“ Not fair.” Both Die and Shinya complain only to gain another glared from the leader and a giggle from the bassist who get a knock on the head from Kaoru. “ Don’t think you going to get away everytime.” But it also did. Shinya, Die and Toshiya nodded in agreement.

 

Kyo arrival another hour later and meet with a very angry Kaoru the moment he walks into the studio. Kyo could sense the anger in Kaoru but he was also in a very damn bad mood today and was not going to start an argument with Kaoru.” I’m sorry Kaoru but can you leave the scolding to another day?” Kyo ignored the answer assuming Kaoru would follow what he says.

 

The other three men gathered at one side whispering. “ Wah new tactic and far more superb than your Toshiya.” Shinya agreed with his lover. “ And it work!” Toshiya added when he see Kaoru moving back to his desk gathering some file. “Kyokyo in a bad mood today even Kaoru don’t dare to poke him.” Toshiya stands up and walks to his lover.

 

No practices for the day only some meeting within the members about their new song. Kaoru showing the others song that he had wrote while Die and Shinya was away and the groups give opinion on each song. Soon it was called for a day.

 

“ KaoKao I think I going back to Kyo place tonight.” Toshiya inform his lover when they were about to leave and Kaoru offer to send the two men back since Kyo was not driving today.

 

The journey was a quiet one with Kyo and Toshiya sitting at the back seat.

 

 

 

Toshiya follow closely behind Kyo while they get up the apartment. A speechless Kyo was very abnormal to the bassist who knows something is wrong with the vocalist and the reason possibly comes from Gackt. Kyo settle on the sofa once he enters the house while Toshiya went to the kitchen to get them some drinks.

 

“ Here.” He passed one can of beer to Kyo and sit beside him. “ What’s about this time?” He asked as soon.

 

Kyo sigh and sleep down onto the sofa resting his head on Toshiya leg. Another hand of his was searching something on the table and come up to be a magazine. Kyo flip to one of the page and show Toshiya. “ He’s flirting.” He adds.

 

Toshiya quickly glance through the report and a trail of sweat appears on his head. “ You mean this?” He tries to hold his laughter but seem fail and a pouting Kyo give him a killer glare. “ Common Kyo, it’s just a report.”

 

“ But it true isn’t it?”

 

Toshiya sweatdrop. He did not expect Kyo to be getting jealous over the article; he smiled thinking how cute Kyo had become after he and Gackt become lover.

 

“ I don’t even understand why he agreed to shot [Moon child] then I realized because Hyde was also in.”

 

But it was after Gackt had agreed isn’t it?

 

“ See what Hyde said here.” Kyo pointed to one of the part. “ He says the moment he opens his eye, he meet Gackt face and that stupid Gackt even say he wanted to kiss Hyde.”

 

Mine… mine maybe Gackt-san was just joking.

 

“ He was flirting!” Kyo insisted.

 

Remember your Levin matter? Gackt-san have forgiven you even it is a fact but now it was just an article saying all this and you get upset over it?

 

“ I’ve called him and he say it was real that he felt like kissing Hyde.”

 

“ WHAT?” He admits?

 

“ I ask him go to hell the moment I heard that and hanged up the phone.”

 

He never explained? Mmm… Impossible. I think it’s you who never listen to his call after that, am I right?

 

“ I think he have fall in love with that Hyde. That man was a beauty though I really doesn’t want to admit it.”

 

Hmm… it true… But Kyo, Toshiya paused and sounds serious. “I’m prettier!” Kyo nearly slip down the sofa. Toshiya was laughing all the way satisfy that his joke has works.

 

See Kyo I believe Gackt-san have reason behind it, let him explain before you set your conclusion okay. By the way I have gave him a call just now, he’ll be over soon.

 

“You called him? When?”

 

Forget about when I call him. I’m leaving now and you better clear your jealousy with Gackt-san.

 

“ What jealousy.” Kyo blushed.

 

 

The next day in studio, Kyo have arrival on time but the others were earlier than him. As soon as he enters the studio Kyo notice the other was giggling while they look at him. “ What the hell are you guy giggling at?” He hate that feeling properly guessed that they were saying something about him.

 

Die was the one speaking first. “ Ne Kyo we didn’t know our dear Kyo baby would get jealous.” Die broke into laughter. “ Especially over a small article…” The room was filled with laughter from the other.

 

Kyo frowned. “ Oh is it? But at least I didn’t stab anyone out of jealousy.”

 

Silent hovered inside the studio. Shinya looked down on his drum guilty, Toshiya sweatdrop, Kaoru glared angrily at the vocalist for mentioning thing he shouldn’t have and Die was all over his Koi to see if the man okay.

 

Isn’t it the best to shut you guy up… Humph.     

  

 ~~~

Does Gackt really want to kiss Hyde?

“ Yes, that stupid idiot had admitted.” But this time Kyo wasn’t that angry in his tone, he was blushing instead.

Something more to it, am I right?

Kyo nodded. “ He say he missed me and see me in that Hyde so he had the rush to kiss him at the moment.”

Hyde? You? Oh Gackt-san must be too tired recently and was imagining thing.

“ What do you mean?” Kyo hiss.

You two were totally different kind. Get it? Okay if you say ‘one always a beauty in his lover eyes’ this convince me that Gackt-san think Hyde into you.

“ Totchi! Does that mean I’m ugly?”

Nope Kyokyo, you’re always cute in my eyes. Hahaha…

“ CUTE?” Kyo frowned. “ I rather choose to be ugly.”

 

~~

~End~

[8/06/03]

 

Note: The inspiration come from [Moon Child] article where I read the part Gackt trying to kiss Hyde then I start thinking what will Kyo react, I just want to write something about it and well it come up to this pointless fic. Hahaha…

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