Though I was asleep, I could still somehow hear him talking to me, soothing me. He was kissing my forehead, and saying, �you know you�ve been through a lot lately, and you want a break. I can give you that. I don�t deserve you. But I can be what you need.�
My conscious mind was whirling, even as I slept. A million thoughts about the recent turn in events were racing through my head. The top one being�What should I do now?
Should I go back to Devil�s Gorge where my father is? Should I take the risk and be with Angelus, despite the horrible things he�s done before? Should I live for the moment? Think about the consequences? Should pink come back in to style?
I awoke with a start, my mind switching in to full-operation mode. I straightened up and looked all around me.
I was still in the limo. Outside, it was getting lighter. I figured it to be about half an hour past dawn. But where were we? All I could see was land. It was like we had left all civilization behind.
Speaking of We�Is Angel still here?
The answer came to me when two arms pulled me back into a gentle embrace. Angel pulled me back to his chest, where I had been resting moments earlier, and said in a low voice, �did you have a bad dream?� His voice portrayed a happy smile that I somehow didn�t think he wore all that often.
I sighed. Did I have a bad dream? Or was I in the bad dream? I�d just ruined all the chances I had for having a decent existence in Devil�s Gorge. Plus now my father had a reason to stop trying to butter me up and get on my good side. I had just proven that my good side to him was pretty much non existent.
But then I thought of Angel�s face when he thought I might stay behind. The look in his eyes spoke so much to me. He was asking me to take a chance. He was saying that he didn�t deserve it, but that he wanted it with all of his soul.
I felt the same. I had started wondering shortly after meeting my father, if maybe I didn�t deserve happiness. If maybe my life was supposed to be about pain and rules. I didn�t deserve to have someone like Angel step in to my life and show me what fun could be like, but I wanted him there. And right now, I would do just about anything to keep him.
I smiled softly, finally answering him and said, �no. No bad dream.�
His eyes were still shut, and he smiled softly against the side of my head. �Good.�
There was a moment of silence between us, and then I broke it. I asked, �Angel?�
�Hmm?� he raised his brow, still not opening his eyes and waking up completely.
�Um�Where are we?� I asked a little hesitantly. True, I wanted to stay with Angel, but also true, I didn�t want to get stuck in the middle of nowhere in a black limousine.
He finally opened his eyes to greet the day, and smiled. �It�s okay. Just trust me.�
�I think I might have proven I do,� I frowned. �But now I seriously want to know where we are, and�Where we�re going.�
�We�re in Florida still,� he told me. �I think we should be close to Miami pretty soon.�
I glanced out the window of the limo, and sure enough there was a mileage sign indicating that it was only another 100 miles to Miami Beach. I felt quite relieved to have an actual destination in my mind now.
�Oh,� I said.
Angel smiled down at me, �what? You thought I was just driving you off into the sunset with no plan?�
�The thought did cross my mind,� I admitted, gazing out the window at the hot world around us.
�You�re safe with me, Buffy,� he assured me, nudging my head back so that his lips were right near my neck. �You�ll always be safe with me. I won�t let anybody near you.�
A fire lit in the pit of my stomach, and I suddenly felt more nervous than ever. My rational mind was screaming at me. It was wondering what had I done? I had just jumped into a vehicle with some guy with a shady past, who was intent upon getting something for the ride out of Devil�s Gorge! That�s what I�d done!
But then his tongue licked over the vein on the side of my neck, and I stopped caring about my rational mind.
�Angel,� I gasped, my head falling back onto his shoulder. He was licking and sucking my skin in the most delightful way, and there was no possible explanation to the feelings I was feeling all over my body. Every nerve ending was alive with life and fire, and I felt like my entire existence was based on his lips and his tongue; making me hotter than I�d ever been, and making me anxious for something I didn�t know how to describe.
His lips traveled down a bit more, to my collar bone, and he nipped over the line of my collar. He pressed gentle kisses over my shoulders, and all around my chest.
I hadn�t even realized that I had moved around in the seat, until I felt the seat beneath my head. I realized then that not only had I turned around, but I had lain down as well.
My fingers linked through the brown locks of Angel�s hair, and I held him closer to me.
�You taste so sweet,� he whispered in a husky voice. �Like heaven. Paradise. Sweet, sweet redemption personified.�
His voice was making me even hotter. There was some key he could turn to make me crazy with want. It was like he knew every thing that would set me off and make me jump in to the pool of lust that he was wading in�Waiting for me.
�I can�t�� I tried to get a grip on reality. �I shouldn�t��
�But you want to?� It wasn�t as much of a question, as much as it was a revelation. True, I shouldn�t, but I wanted to so badly.
�Yes,� I gasped out as his left hand slid over my right breast. �Yes. I do want to. I want to.�
He lifted his head then, and gazed down into my eyes. His irises were almost black with desire, and I imagined his entire eyes being nothing but blackness. That blackness was calling me. Inviting me to dance in the moonlight. It would be so easy to just give in�
�No. We can�t do this. I can�t let you. You�ll regret it later if we do anything,� he whispered then, sitting up so that he was on his knees, and no longer on all fours over top of me. �I want you so badly, but I can�t let you want me back.�
I felt like he had just stabbed me in the gut. How could he get me so excited and then not follow through in some way? I didn�t know how he would �follow through� exactly, but I knew there must be something at the end of that hazy road of lust he just jogged down with me.
�But�� I sat up. �But you�You were-� I didn�t know what to say to finish that sentence. �I thought��
�I�m sorry,� he apologized. �I shouldn�t have let myself get out of control with you like that. I swore I wouldn�t do that with you. That you�d be something I wouldn�t touch. I just�I�m so sorry. So Sorry.� He looked down, like he felt as if he�d just murdered a puppy or something.
I looked at him and asked, �are you pulling back for your own conscience, or for my remorse?�
�Yours,� he said quickly, then added, �well mine.� Then he changed his mind again, his brow furrowed, �no, both! You�d regret it and I�d feel bad. It�s a vicious circle that way.�
�Angel�I trust you,� I whispered.
He looked at me, and I could tell he was melting inside. �I know. I want you to.� He offered his hand then, and when I took it he pulled me forward in to his embrace. �I want you to trust me. So trust me when I say that I�m doing the right thing here. Just let me do this, okay?�
I nodded in to his chest. �Okay.�