Some Kind of Feeling

Title: Some Kind of Feeling
Summary: Put enough pressure on anyone and eventually they're going to snap. Harry is almost to the breaking point, unsure of anything anymore. This is a poem about all of the thoughts and feelings that are getting all mixed up in his head as he thinks about his guilt and his destiny and comes to terms with both.
Content: Poem
Genre: Angst
Rating: PG
Chapter: One-Shot
Status: Complete
Disclaimer: Do I really have to put one of these on? I obviously do not own Harry Potter or anything even remotely affiliated with it (although I do own a copy of each of the five books).
Author's Notes: View Author's Notes

These lies are getting
All mixed up in my head
I no longer know
What is real and what's pretend
I don't really
Know myself anymore
I cannot figure out
What I am doing this for
Who am I? you ask
Well I don't really know
Sometimes I wish I could
Just let it all go
Or bundle up this pain
In a place deep inside
But when you are the cause
Then there's no place to hide

I just don't know
And I can't figure out
How I can move on
When I'm so filled with doubt
And I'm feeling so alone
But nobody sees
I want to atone
I am down on my knees
But some things can't change
The past can't be broken
You can't always take back
Harsh words that were spoken
The trouble is not that
You did it to begin
The problems arise when
You can't make it end

My assurance is fading
As time slowly moves
I put forth so much
But what do I prove?
One mistake is all it takes
And you're at the bottom again
If I fall after all
Will I have strength left to begin?
And I don't know why
I'm trying so hard
When things have a tendency
To just fall apart
But I keep pushing forward
It is all I can do
I know I can't save everyone
But I can at least help a few

AUTHOR'S NOTES: I actually wrote this as a song to begin with and didn't even have Harry in mind. After I had written it up, though, I went back and read it over and realized that it actually described the way I would imagine Harry to feel fairly well. I know some parts are hard to make sense of and that the poem is pretty vague, but I hope you enjoyed it none the less.

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