Below are some
stories involving Internet Affairs, that have destroyed Families.
Please realize
that most of these stories have come to me via my e-mail, so they are copy
and pasted -word for word!
*Dear Abby*
I found this in our local newspaper
, I hope "Dear Abby" doesn't get upset for me posting this here!
The date is: February 5th,2002
Dear Abby: I found out that my mom has been
exchanging
e-mail love letters with a man from out of state.
I know because she had been staying up until 2 and
3 a.m. on the computer. I did a little detective work and
found the letters. They talked about meeting and
how much they love each other.
Mom uses a fake name and has told this guy numerous
lies about herself as a young , pretty girl when she's
really a 53-year-old frumpy housewife. The man is
married with two kids; Mom has been married for 30
years and has three kids and two grandchildren. She
is seriously addicted to the Internet and has been sneaking
around to get on it. I found out she also calls this
guy.
I know personally how addictive the Internet can
be. It can ruin your life by making infidelity easier. I don't know
if I should confront her. Please help. I'm desperate
for advice.-Daughter in the Lone Star State
Dear Daughter: Talk to your
mother in confidence. Apologize for snooping and tell her what you have
discoved. Ask her
what she would do if your
father were to find out what has been going on. If she has been spending
so much time on the computer that it aroused your suspicions, it would
be interesting to know what your father is thinking. She needs to
consider if her creative
writing is worth jeopardizing her marriage. Read on:
Dear Abby: After reading the letter from "Disillusioned
in Clarksville" about the flake she married after meeting
him on the Internet, I want to let you know that
sometimes meeting someone on the Internet DOES work out. I
met my husband online. I wanted to chat with people
all over the world. The Internet was new to me, and I thought it
was a great way to talk to people everywhere. I wasn't looking for romance.
We met when he was in the Marine Corps in California
and I was living in New York. We hit it off from
the start. It was almost "love at first talk." We met online in July 1998
and in person in late November of that year. We
were married the following month.
He is everything I could ever want in a man, and
so much more. God bless the U.S. Marines.(They do laundry,
iron, and clean!)-Izabela in Sciota, Pa.
Dear Izabela: Now that's
a ringing endorsement. May you enjoy more years of happiness together.
The Internet is
a wonderful tool. Although
a decade ago people were predicting it would replace letters, telephones
and malls, those predictions were a bit premature. For the foreseeable
future, they will all coexist together.
As for meeting people online,
the same precautions should be observed as for meeting people through a
personal ad,
at a nightclub or a gym.
The dating game is both a gombol and a gamble. Take your time. Check the
facts. Caveat emptor
(Let the buyer beware).
The person can turn out to be a lump of coal in your Christmas stocking
or the jewel
of a lifetime.
Dear Abby is written by Pauline Phillips and daughter
Jeanne Phillips.
From my E-mail:
Thank you for sharing this truth about internet affairs. My marriage
was ruined when my husband started chatting. At first he wanted me
to join him. So I did. But, it was strange and uncomfortable
to me to "chat" with strangers about things I only had shared with him.
Anyhow, inspite of my discomfort, he continued.
He spent a lot of time on the computer. He said he was working, but
I knew better. He was not as attentive to me and the children.
He became dissatisfied with my every attempt to please him. He stopped
talking things out with me. I would find signs that he had
been masterbating. I was certain that it was while he was on-line
at 2 and 3 in the morning.
I began to feel invisible, undesirable, and very very hurt. Depression
hit me so hard that I ended up on suicide watch in a hospital.
He never accepted that I felt betrayed by his on-line life. He said
that I was being oversensitive and foolish.
I finally left him and his computer. We have been separated for three
years and are currently going through a divorce.
We have to communicate because we have children together so, I send him
an e-mail. It is the only way to get any real conversation out of
him.
I enjoy being on-line when time permits. I like to write. I
enjoy helping people too. I just wanted to say thank you for this
site and your posts on Lovingyou.com. They have been quite a comfort
to me.
I have a problem right now. For the last couple of weeks now, I been having a affair with another man. Just this morning he asked me to marry him. I have fallen in love with this man, even though we never met, and I fallen out of love with my husband. We have been married 10 years now and we have three beautiful children together. This man I been chatting with has sent me pictures of him and vice versa. We chat 2 to 3 hours at a time and gotten to know each other very well. He desperatly wants to meet me and I really want to meet him. The problem is he lives in Another Country and I live in the United States. Please help me, I don't know what to do.
You ask if internet
affairs can last, I think they can last. However not always in the compassity
that someone would want them to last. I had an internet affair. I pretended
to be this young, attractive, successful woman. So in the course of having
a great time and meeting some wonderful people. I met this wonderful man.
Who I instantly fell in love with. WE had a great connection and it lasted
for a few months. I began to realize that this could never happen between
him and I. He divorced his wife and I began to feel quilty, I knew that
this could never be between him and I and I was giving him false hope.
I was not young, attractive, or single. I was married with children. I
tried to break it off between us. But he was in love with what he thought
was real. So I decided to fake my death. That was the worst mistake I have
ever made in my life. I lost just about every friend on the internet I
had because of it. After some time went by and he divorced his wife and
I seperated from my husband for awhile, We started talking again. Now I
consider him my best friend he knows all my secrets.
So you ask if internet
affairs last? Yes they do, MY only advise is be honest with yourself and
who ever your talking to. Tell them who and what you are. Lets face it
you can talk to someone on the internet about anything. They don't usually
judge you because if they do then they have been judged themselves. I am
glad that I met someone like the man I met on the internet. I hope someday
to meet him. I will always love him he is a wonderful man and a great friend.
I don't plan on ever
meeting him and know deep in my heart that will never happen. But I believe
in fate and I believe in Destiny. If something is meant to be it will be.
I have no regrets about what I did. Because I have become a better person
from it. I am now very active in church and my kids lives and I don't spend
alot of my time on the internet.
I would like to tell this
man that he has made me see who I am and has helped me through some very
difficult times in my life. I remember him in prayer every day and will
for the rest of my life. Thank you.