By J. Estelle Newlin
She fascinates me,
One minute she can be seen up dancing,
Allowing music to wrap around her like a shroud.
The next minute she could be crying,
THe thoughts in hre head having grown far too loud.
I watch her stare in the mirror,
Examining the pretty face she seems to be so afraid of.
I watch her stare at her body,
Womdering why no one loves her like they do in story books.
I watch her sleep,
Clutching at pillows as if they were people, wanting someone to hold her close.
I watch her cringe away from people,
Afraid of who they really are inside.
I watch her pour her heart out on paper,
Mystifying minds with the emotions she has trapped inside.
I read her thoughts through these pages,
As she scribbles down more, not allowing her mind to feed on itself.
I see her loos a little more faith everyday,
In everybody and anything because of the pain they bring her.
I've watched her heal wounds one day,
Only to have them reopened the next by those who intend to cut them deeper.
I watch her worry endlessly,
About those who seem to haunt her heart.
I watch her bury herself deeper,
When those people who haunt her hurt her a little bit more.
I watch her stare at the stars on her cieling,
WIshing she could be a part of the stars somehow.
So Many dreams in her mind that reach out,
To Anyone who is willing to enter it's depths.
So many contradictions in her life,
That threaten to destroy the woman she tries so very hard to be.
She's the biggest mystery I have tried to solve,
As I try to embrace her again and again.
But, When I reach out to her she disappears before my eyes.
As I stare at the stars on my cieling all I can see,
Is this woman who mystifies me so much... is Me.
(Copyright J. Estelle Newlin)