Category: Short story
Rating: PG-13
Timeline: pre-Episode One, Obi-Wan is fifteen.
Archive: Anywhere
Disclaimer: These characters are the creation & property of
Lucasfilm.
Summary: A visit home, ties pondered.

                   ELEI -- by DBKate (formerly JediKate)

                   I.

"So tell me again padawan, why is it you don't enjoy being back
on your home planet?"

Obi-Wan sighed as he and Qui-Gon made their way through the tall
blue grasses of Lower Cythra. An after dinner walk, one Obi-
Wan's grandmother recommended as a cure for the 'stuffed'
feeling both of them complained of after eating a huge shuffa
roast dinner, complete with a full complement of vegetables and
grains, not to mention dessert.

It was Obi-Wan's yearly visit back to his native world, a visit
Qui-Gon had insisted on, even after Obi-Wan's long series of
urgent protests in regard to schoolwork and drills, not a single
one of them swaying the Jedi Master in the slighest.

But now, after the dinner was finished and the sun was setting
on Western Cythra's horizon it was obvious that Qui-Gon was
curious as to "real" reason why Obi-Wan tried so hard to wriggle
out of his annual obligation.

Unfortunately, even Obi-Wan wasn't sure why. 

"I do like it here," Obi-Wan protested lightly, the grass
curling beneath his cloak. "It's just that the Temple has been
my home for so long. And since my parents died ... " He
paused, then shrugged. "I love seeing Nan, especially since it
pleases her so much to see me. But I feel more at home on
Coruscant, that's all."

"But this is the place you were born."

"And taken away from when I was five," Obi-Wan responded
lightly, absentmindedly tugging at an overhanging hedrga bush.
"How can I be tied to a world I barely remember?"

Qui-Gon didn't looked quite convinced. "I think you have more
of a connection here than you realize, padawan. Our home is in
our blood, we can't shake it, not unless we deny ourselves."

"Maybe," Obi-Wan admitted, before squinting off into the
distance, shading his eyes against the late afternoon glare.
"Say, I think I know that homestead," he said, pointing at a
small hovel, a few hundred meters to the north. "I remember it
from when I was very small. May we take a look?"

"Of course." Qui-Gon smiled and they strolled companionably
toward the 'stead, its disrepair immediately obvious, even from
a distance. The grass sprouted wildly in all directions,
reaching, in some places, up to Qui-Gon's thigh and together,
they ambled over fallen brush, most of it rotting and dried.

"This doesn't look good," Obi-Wan murmured, sidestepping a
toppled tree. "But I remember these neighbors now. They were
old even back in my childhood. And they had no children that we
knew of."

"It's possible they've passed into the Force." Qui-Gon
carefully pushed a broken fence aside and glanced around the
front yard. "But recently, I think. There's still a bit of
livestock here," he said, pointing to a pair of scrawny-looking
tawrnhens pecking among the pebbles for insects. 

"Yes," Obi-Wan agreed, his brow furrowing. "I think we should
check over the property to make sure there aren't any larger
animals around. It would be cruel to leave them here to starve
to death. I know that Nan's little barn has some room in it and
it pleases her to tend to her 'herd.'" 

Qui-Gon silently agreed and the barn door squeaked loudly upon
opening as Obi-Wan squinted through the hazy, dust-filled light.
There were few signs of habitation, except for a few water
buckets, an empty feedbag ... and a muddy looking lump.

Obi-Wan made a small noise of surprise when the lump stirred,
then looked up at him with two dull brown eyes, its short snout
drooping over dry lips. The creature took a wheezing breath,
struggled for a moment to rise but its hind legs quickly gave
out and its meter long body flopped back onto the hard dirt floor
with a thud.

Obi-Wan knelt beside the sick animal, his expression stricken.
"Elei," he whispered. "Oh, Elei ... what's happened to you?"

"Do you know this creature, padawan?" Qui-Gon asked, kneeling
beside them.

"Yes, he's a monuth and his name is Elei," Obi-Wan said as he
pulled off his cloak and gently draped it over the beast. "He
was my pet since birth. I remember him more than I remember
almost anything else about this place." He ran a gentle hand
over the creature's brow and spoke soothingly in his native
tongue. "Poor Elei. Elei talos dari, ton. Ton daru Elei." 

The monuth whinnied with what could have been surprise. He
nuzzled Obi-Wan's hand before closing his eyes, his drooping
ears flat against his skull.

"He looks a bit under the weather. Perhaps he's had trouble
finding food or water when his caretakers left him behind," said
Qui-Gon. "Either way, I don't think he's been thriving here."

Obi-Wan nodded gravely. "Do you think we could possibly bring
him back with us? He's not quite as heavy as he looks, I can
carry him, and I know that Nan ..."

"I'll take the first kilometer, you can get the rest," replied
Qui-Gon, bending and carefully hoisting the monuth into his
arms. 

"Thank you, Master." Obi-Wan replied gratefully. "I appreciate
it."

They hiked back to the Kenobi 'stead, trading the beast between
them as they walked. Reaching his grandmother's barn, Obi-Wan
nudged the wooden door open and gently lowered Elei onto a soft
pile of feed grass.

He gathered a bowl of water and sat next to the monuth,
washcloth in hand. "They're very smart creatures, Master."
Obi-Wan sponged a bit of mud from the animal's flanks. "As
smart as Banthas, which are a great dealer larger."

"I'm not sure that a Bantha is all that smart, but I'll take
your word for it." Qui-Gon settled onto a small barn stool.
"He certainly makes a pretty pet. Do you remember getting him?"

Obi-Wan shook his head thoughtfully. "Not really. I remember
him being very small and wiggling in my hands, making these
little noises." He smiled brightly and softed a dry patch
behind the monuth's ears. "I loved him so much. Every night
I'd let him into my quarters and onto my pallet much to my
mother's horror. Oh, how she would yell everytime she'd see his
snout or tail hanging out from beneath the bed linens."

"Why?" asked Qui-Gon curiously. "He seems tame."

"Master," Obi-Wan chided. "An animal in the bed? That's not
the proper place for them. Animals have to stay outside where
they belong, why, letting them in the house is bad enough. But
I was only two or three years old then, so I didn't get punished
very badly for it."

"Oh, I see. Animals should always stay outside where they
belong." Qui-Gon folded his arms across his chest. "Therefore
little Elei should have been in the cold with all the other
'pathetic life forms' eh, padawan?"

Obi-Wan flushed straight to the roots of his fair hair. "I
didn't say Elei was pathetic, a house isn't where he belongs,
that's all." He shrugged, embarrassed. "I'm sorry, Master, but
..."

"It's all right," Qui-Gon said, a tiny smile crossing his face.
"I now see where you get this notion about our exalted place in
the universe over the other living creatures. It's been bred
into you, from birth practically, and I rather glad than
otherwise. I'd hate to think you dreamt up such an idea on your
own."

Obi-Wan sighed heavily, his cheeks still burning. "Anyway, I'm
going bring the breedhealer back here tomorrow morning. Elei
doesn't look good, I don't think he's eaten in days." 

Qui-Gon leaned closer and examined the dozing monuth. "I'd
say it's closer to weeks, padawan," he said gently. "Maybe we
can get some water into him at the very least."

"We could try that," said Obi-Wan doubtfully. He bent close and
began to talk to the animal again, putting touches of Force into
his words. Jedi couldn't control non-sentient animals, the
thought patterns were too different, but sometimes they could
influence sick or sleepy ones to do small natural tasks such as
eat or drink. 

"Elei," he coaxed, holding water under the animal's snout. "Ton
daru, mon Elei. Pur Elei, son blau, ton don. Preti, beun,
swant Elei, du shon."

The monuth opened his eyes and soulfully gazed up at Obi-Wan.
He nuzzled his master's knee before sinking back down, chin to
the ground, ignoring the water completely. 

"Swes Elei," Obi-Wan repeated a bit more forcefully. "Swes ton
don."

The animal whinnied weakly then took a few blind swipes at the
bowl with his long pink tongue. A little water splashed, not
much, and Obi-Wan lowered the bowl with a sigh. "It's better
than nothing, I guess."

Qui-Gon nodded. "It will have to do," he said, rising from the
stool. "Now, shall we join your grandmother? She's threatening
to make sweet cakes for a late snack and if we get there early
enough we might escape with just the tea."

"I ... I think I'll stay here a little while longer. If that's
all right with you, Master," Obi-Wan added quickly. 

Qui-Gon nodded understandingly. "I'll let your grandmother know
she has a new 'guest.'" He gathered up his long cloak. "And
I'll save you some sweetcakes. I'm sure there'll be more than
enough."

"Thank you." Obi-Wan smiled wanly and returned his attention to
the monuth as Qui-Gon quietly closed the barn door behind him. 

Qui-Gon walked back to the 'stead, glancing back only once
toward the barn where in the window a small lantern was lit and
he could just make out the outlines of a small, sickly creature
and the human being kneeling beside him, watching with care.

           II.

Qui-Gon awoke as the sun rose, blinking through the bright
morning light streaming into his guest room window. He
stretched lazily and yawned before swinging his legs over the
side of the pallet with a groan. Not like his padawan, who
could leap out of bed like a gazla on fire, he thought wryly.

He squinted sleepily at the pallet across from his and his eye
widened when he discovered it empty. How could that be, he
wondered with a small twinge of unease. Obi-Wan was never one
to give up a late morning's nap, not since he'd known him. 

Qui-Gon rose, quickly bound up his hair and pulled on a fresh
tunic. The boots followed and he schooled his features into a
serene expression as he went from the guest room to the main
area, where Obi-Wan's grandmother, Nan, was already fussing
through breakfast.

"Good morning, " she said with a bright look in her sky blue
eyes. "I hope you're hungry, the hens were kind enough to lay
two eggs each today."

"I'm very hungry," replied Qui-Gon with a polite nod of his
head. "Amazing as that may sound, since I'm being fed better
here than at most of the royal courts I've visited."

She beamed at him. "Oh, go on with you. I swear, the way you
Jedi talk."

"However," Qui-Gon paused delicately. "I haven't seen Obi-Wan
this morning. Has he come out for breakfast yet?" He shook his
head quickly at Nan's suddenly worried expression. "No, no ...
I'm sure he's still in the barn with Elei."

"Oh," replied Nan, wincing. "Oh, dear. You don't think ..."

Qui-Gon sighed. "I'll go check. Either way, I'm sure
everything will be fine."

He squeezed her shoulder before heading out of the 'stead,
toward the little barn. There was no sign of either Obi-Wan or
Elei and he hesitated before slowly opening the door. 

At first the little monuth looked asleep, all clean and covered
with Obi-Wan's warm brown cloak. Upon closer inspection though,
it was obvious that the creature was no longer breathing, and
Qui-Gon sighed heavily before turning to his padawan, who sat
silently in the corner, staring at the dead animal, looking pale
and numb. 

"Obi-Wan," began Qui-Gon sorrowfully. "I ..." 

Obi-Wan looked up at him through watery eyes. "I know, Master.
There is no death, there is only the Force," he interrupted
softly. "Although I can't understand why I feel this way for
just an animal."

Qui-Gon slowly settled in next to him. "What way is that,
padawan?" 

"With Elei gone, I feel as though part of me has passed away
as well, a part I've not had the time or the foresight to
appreciate." He bit his lip and angrily swiped away a stray
tear that dared to slip down his cheek. "As though what's left
of me has been set adrift and I'll never again be able to come
home. Which is ludicrous, because the Temple is my ..." His
voice trailed away and he shook his head, suddenly speechless.

"A building is not one's home, padawan," said Qui-Gon softly.
"The people and our shared experiences with them are our home,
our trust in them, the happiness we feel when we're together and
should a man stay a thousand years on one world, if his family,
his joy is somewhere else, then he's not home." 

"I know, but ... I ... ," he said shakily, his voice thick
with grief. "I miss my parents," he blurted out with a sob.
"I miss the home we had before the soldiers came and killed
them. I miss my old playmates and the marketplace at dawn.
I miss the snow and the river in the summer and I hate knowing
that I'll never see any of these things again. And ... and
they'll never see me either. No matter what I do, what I
accomplish, it won't matter, because they're gone. Gone forever."

"I know," Qui-Gon murmured, drawing the weeping boy close against
him. "It's hard to lose our childhood to just memories. But it's
better to mourn than to forget, Obi-Wan."

"Remembering hurts," Obi-Wan said, his voice muffled against
Qui-Gon's tunic. "That's why I hate coming back here."

"And yet, if you try and accept your losses and the grief that
comes with them," said Qui-Gon, smoothing the spiky hair away
from his padawan's brow. "You might find that coming here will
no longer be as painful as before. In fact, coming here could
become a joyful reminder of your family and you can begin to
look forward to the time when you'll see them again." He hugged
the boy hard. "You know you'll see them again, don't you,
padawan?"

"Yes, Master." Obi-Wan sniffled and gave Qui-Gon a blurry
smile. "In the Force, we are all bound as one for eternity."
He wiped his eyes with the back of his hand and nodded his
gratitude when Qui-Gon handed him a small, folded facecloth.
"Of course, until then, I always have you."

"Have me, padawan?" Qui-Gon asked quizzically.

"Sure," Obi-Wan replied, rising and tucking the facecloth into a
fold of his tunic. "Until then, I have you as my family."

To Qui-Gon's great surprise, he felt his cheeks redden. "I ...
I thank you, padawan. I'm honored that you would think so."

"Well, you said your home is where your joy is." Reaching out,
Obi-Wan helped Qui-Gon to his feet, then looked at him with
solemn eyes. "And my joy is with you, Master."

Simply said, and so matter of fact was the boy's tone that Qui-
Gon felt himself flush bright scarlet. "I think your Nan has
breakfast waiting, padawan," he said, trying to hide his pleased
embarrassment. "And later, if it pleases you, we'll give Elei a
good sendoff. I'm sure he'll be waiting for you along with
everyone else."

Obi-Wan grinned. "And next time, he gets to stay in the
bed, no matter what."

"I'm sure he'll be glad to discover that," replied Qui-Gon, as
together, Master and Padawan made their way back to the Kenobi
'stead, the long blue grass of Cythra curling beneath their
boots the sun rising brightly before them.

~~~~~~~~~~

end All comments and reviews welcome! :-)