Dedicated to Ryan....
Dedicated in loving memory of Ryan Listman
Some of his posts and pictures
and our memories.....
We wanted a place to remember Ryan and
its still so hard to believe he's gone
The loss of his wit and humor is sorely felt
We miss you Ryan.........
BELOW IS HIS INTRODUCTION TO THE GROUP:
...oh god...thiz iz the part I hated most in school...
"stand up and tell uz a little about yourself".
It waz the "stand up" part i hated az i waz usually on
drugz and it waz hard to manage...
HOWEVER! hrmmph (clearing throat) all that'z behind me
now, and the only drug I need are me boyz.
"WHERE'Z ME BOYZ!!!" - right, Cy? - (Cy, are you out there..?)
"Hello, I'm Ryan, and I'm a Boyzoner.." (god, it'z
all too familiar..)
But, hey, thiz iz a support group, right? Like a 12 stepper?
I'm hooked and I admit it.
I first tried the boyz by accident. It was just a
little "taste" at first.
You know how it iz. You're depressed, anxiouz, surfing channelz,
picking at your toenailz.
Suddenly, you're eyez open wide for the first time that day.
Your earz have trouble adjusting to the new high.
There'z a cloud of pure, clear, energy alive with the
loveliest harmoniez dancing above your head and -
WAIT! - YOUR HEAD IZ RIGHT NOW IN THE MIDDLE OF IT!!!
ZAPPP! You're Boyzoned.
A smile comes to your lipz unbidden. The entire atmosphere around
you iz newly alive, like Spring.
You're moving to the magic. THOSE VOICEZ!
You focuz your eyez.
THOSE FACEZ! THOSE SMILEZ!
(well, alright, not Shane, he waz concentrating)
Boy singerz actually smiling az they sang???
In 1999? Not since Bob Crosby And The BobCatz, maybe.
(I heard thiz from my mom. I'm only 49.)
WHO ARE THEY? You HAVE to know!
Then, like visitorz from another world, they're GONE!
NO!!! WHO ARE THEY???!!! DON'T DO THIZ TO ME!!!
Fortunately you learn you tuned in to a PBS fundraiser,
and it'z something for Andy Webber that CATS guy.
yaddadda...yaddadda...yaddadda...
you sit and listen to the spiel -
AND THEY DON'T MENTION THEIR NAMEZ - ARRGGGHHHHH!!!
THEY DON'T MENTION THEIR NAMEZ!!!
You do your deep breathing and mini-meditation.
Calmly, you pick up the TV Guide and frantically
check the forthcoming dayz.
YEZ!!!
It'z a birthday celebration and will be on again in 3 dayz!
3 DAYZ???:
BUT YOU'RE GONNA BE READY!!! You program your VCR for the
whole 5 hourz - you wait - and then the magic day comez and
you learn they're "Boyzone".
"Boyzone???"
Yikez... The name doesn't thrill you...soundz like the name
of a gay bar. - NOT THAT THERE'Z ANYTHING WRONG WITH THAT!
-But old Willie Shakez said it best..."a band by any other name
would sound az sweet"
And they do. Sweet - and a little Salty - That's me boyz.
You play the tape over and over and over.
While you've since learned there were a few otherresting guestz that performed - all
YOU knew - or WANTED to know - was Fast Forward and
Rewind. Hooked. You got it. EVERY DAY for MONTHZ
began with my cuppa and "No Matter What" - FF to the
finale when the ladz come up center stage in those
white suitz with those dazzling smilez (alright, not
Shane, he waz concentrating)- and my day haz properly
begun. And you know the rest. The housework
goez...the cat learnz how to use the
canopener...there'z NOTHING left to wear...all those
canned goodz you were saving for the
bombshelter...GONE... You annoy the shit out of people
because you use z'z where you're supposed to use
s's... That'z why I'm here.
My name'z Ryan. And I'm a Boyzoner.
A picture from Ryan's visit to the diner in Blackwood
where he, Toni, Elaine and Steve saw me off before
I left for Australia
From left Dawn/NJ, Toni/VA/NJ, Ryan and Elaine/Boston
April 2002
We shared laughs, food, Godzilla, Steo cheesecake and great fun
Ryan was also so sweet to bring me two audio tapes of
his favorite BZ interviews/radio programs,
I still thankfully have them and treasure the memory of a
very sweet and wonderful man. One who made me laugh til
I had tears running down my face.
Things didn't work out quite as planned in Australia and
Ryan was taken far too soon from us.
All the more reason to treasure the friends we have and
the good times now while we have them.
Ryan missed his daily BZ fix and I along with so many others miss
Ryan's treasured emails.
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