DILEMMA : A COUPLE WITH DIFFERENT RELIGIONS
Many decisions can be made easily, but some of them are difficult to make. Moreover, in deciding to have relationship with a boyfriend or girlfriend with different religion is significant. It’s a dilemma for you to continue your relationship until you two get married in the future or not. From case to case, there is a couple to get married overseas. But is that the solution?
Unfortunately it is not. Even at last they must get divorce. There are some alternatives to do. Whatever alternative you choose, I recommend you to think it twice. As people say, look before you leap. In other words, think seriously before you act. You can behave honestly based on these alternatives.
- Both of you don’t change religion and you get
married with or without the agreement of your parents or family.
You may get married while you two have different religions. You can get married here in Indonesia or even overseas. But the problems occur when your family and parents disagree with your wedding party. You may insist that you two are in love and you two can’t be separated. You want to live forever with your lover. However, the problem occurs again when you have children. What religion would be appropriate for your children is something difficult to decide. In having the religious service or the religious activities you two might have problems when the date is the same. In the beginning it doesn’t matter at all, but at last you will be in trouble.
- One of you changes your religion whether you are
forced to do so or not. You consider it as the better way to get married.
This is sometimes a better solution if you are having relationship with a partner, who has different religion from yours. It is a good idea if one of you changes the religion so that in the future you can get married and has the same way of life. You two have the same principle and way of life later. But, it is sometimes difficult to talk about when you go steady or make a date since it is a sensitive matter. Make sure that you two are in love each other and you two want to go to the next step namely to get married in a wedding party, but if not, the problem occurs again.
- Both of you know that you are not likely to lie
your feelings. However, to respect the principle, love and dignity, you
two decide not to continue to get married in the future.
Act realistically in facing the reality. If you think for you, it is impossible to maintain the relationship until you get married in the wedding party. You two can make a commitment or an agreement not to go to the next step namely to get married in the wedding party. You still consider him or her close friend. You must realize that sometimes love doesn’t mean to possess. Whether you are in love with your boyfriend or girlfriend doesn’t mean that you will marry him or her. So, act realistically!
Are you still confused? Never mind, it is natural. Consider it as a test from God the Almighty towards our faith and God must give something best to us
I hope three alternatives mentioned above can be of assistance if you have relationship with a boyfriend or girlfriend, who has different religion from yours. It is better for you to think logically. It gives you an ideal solution if you think rationally. Whatever alternative you choose, try to do the best. From our faith and inner self, we can know whether someone is the best for us or not. But remember people say, “Man proposes; God disposes”.
(Daviq
Rizal, S.Pd.)