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| When I'm walking home from school with Benji and Suk, the man pictured below (who we shall call Ernest) walks past us every single time with his hand positioned frighteningly close to his groin. After much discussion between me and my 2 walking counterparts we have reached the conclusion that Ernest is suffering from 'Wanker's Cramp', a hand muscle disorder commonly associated with too much masturbation. Not only does Ernest walk past us every school day, but he passes us at exactly the same time and in exactly the same location which is pretty damn freaky. We have also observed that Ernest's family live in a nearby bus stop, which is nice. UPDATE: You may have been wondering why Ernest hasn't been seen around his usual haunts recently, well David's Nice Site can exclusively reveal that Ernest has embarked on a career in property development and he is now CEO of a leading property development company. His employees have loveably nicknamed him 'the big chinky cheese', which I personally think is quite harsh. Look out for a new look business tycoon Chinese wanking man at a bus stop near you. |
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| He's a handsome chap, is Ernest | |||||||||||||
| He's a happy fellow, is Ernest | |||||||||||||