On one of my business trips to New York City in the 1960's, I left Dallas early because I wanted to see the Dallas Cowboys whip up on the New York Giants. That was when the Dallas Cowboys still could sometimes WIN!

        Well, I got all settled in my room at a hotel near the Grand Central Station just in time to tune in the football game. Turned on the TV and guess what? It wouldn't come on! I called the front desk and told them very politely that I had a small problem. My damn TV wouldn't come on, and I had made a special trip from Dallas just to see the football game!

        The desk clerk said he would send up a MECHANIC to fix it. About thirty minutes later a guy showed up with a real long screwdriver and poked around in the back of the TV and finally turned to me and said, "It's broke!"

        I called the desk again and said, "Don't you have an empty room with a working TV that you could switch out for mine?" Desk clerk lied like a dawg and said, "We don't have any empty rooms!" I decided to go find a bar with a TV and when I passed the front desk I noticed that the desk clerk had a real long nose!

        A few minutes later I found a bar with a TV and ordered a sodie pop. A gentleman who apparently had been in the bar quite a while moved over a few stools and sat next to me. He said, "Would you like to hear the story about my cat?" I said, "Not really." But he started telling me his story anyhow. I don't know what he had been drinking but it sure had slowed his speech down. It took him about thirty minutes to finish his story. Seems that he always let his cat sleep with him, and one night the cat had pooped in the bed.

        A few minutes later, when I had absorbed that interesting information he turned to me again and said, "Would you like to hear the story about my cat?" I swallered the rest of my sodie pop and high-tailed it outta there. The Dallas Cowboys were losing anyhow!

        Since I was right near to Grand Central Station and had seen it in the movies I thought I should get some education and do some exploring. I did get an education alright. I was accosted by three panhandlers as soon as I got inside that place! After I escaped from them I saw people sleeping on the floor and even in telephone booths.

        I thought about going back to the bar to get another sodie pop, but I didn't want to hear no more pooping cat stories so I just went ambling on down the street gawking up at the tall buildings and dodging cars that were trying to run me over. I was right near Central Park and walking across a street and you won't believe what happened to me next. I dang near got run over by a HORSE pulling a BUGGY…..right smack dab in the middle of New York City!

        I decided right then and there that I would get myself back to my hotel room and order something to eat from room service. Guess what! It was too late for room service. I love New York!