The Bottom Line

Despite all the odds, here in the UK we still keep up to date with our beloved WWF. Despite Channel 4's best attempts to blow their lucrative contract, by sticking Sunday Night Heat on if and when they please, and delaying the PPVs just so that they can throw an advert in, to tell all us wrestling fans to call Chatback NOW!, we've come out of 2000 refreshed, excited and looking for more this year. Starting no further ahead than this year's Royal Rumble, which oh joy of joy, is another Channel 4 delayed production.

But as we enter this new year, I'm starting to think about where the WWF is going with various angles. Triple H vs Kurt Angle at the Rumble? Do I smell an Angle face turn? Will Edge and Christian go with them and get the cheers that the fans deep down want to give them? And will The Rock go the other way, turning heel to balance the books and set him up for an almighty clash at Wrestlemania? And what of Regal? What of Regal????

And so its these thoughts and others which I'm gonna go on about today. And if in a year's time, if any of this has happened, I'll be as surprised as you. I honestly can't think of a better way to gain all your respect than by showing you a complete lack of prediction skills. I never call the PPVs right in our house's betting rings. Ah well. So sit back and relax, as I tell you what probably won't happen this year. But hey, we'll have fun on the way.

This year, I expect a lot more WWF title changes. Last year, Big Show (remember him?), Triple H (twice), The Rock (twice) and Kurt Angle held the gold. Benoit and Jericho had a go as well, if it weren't for officials sticking their noses in. Stone Cold and The Undertaker, who don't have many years left in them, will both be given a chance to be top dog again. Stone Cold's HHH feud will carry the fed for most of the year. I hope, I pray, that The Undertaker does it without his motorbike, and with an urn or something. Have you noticed how since he dropped Kid Rock's music, good ole J.R. now refers to him as The Deadman, and not as The American Badass. Step by step, I think that the Phenom is coming back. Our Olympic Hero will be looking to turn face sooner rather than later, as he's feuded with most of the faces already. Its crying out for another set of U-S-A chants. As for Trips, expect another year of team play, with a big feud with Austin to explode, and maybe another shock face turn down the road.

Another big hope that I have is that Kane will be given a chance. The WWF has portrayed him as this monster who cannot be defeated, who feels not a chair shot, who always gets up mid-people's elbow. Yet Y2J can beat him by pushing some barrels on him? I don't think so. Speaking of which, Jericho will be hoping that this is his year. I hate to disappoint him, but it probably isn't coming. The guy makes me laugh with some of his promos, they're pretty much at my level, but his in-ring style is sometimes shocking. I read somewhere that Kane's moves look like they hurt their opponent, but don't, and Jericho's look like they don't hurt, but do. This really isn't a boast that a WWF superstar wants to make. On the complete opposite end of the spectrum is Chris Benoit. This guy is incredible, his moves are great, and he can make even the shoddiest look good in the ring. Well, maybe not Billy Gunn. But as soon as Benoit ditches two things: The Radicalz, and the IC belt, he can go on to be the biggest thing in the WWF. He's that good, and this could be the year of the Crossface. I say that he has to lose his partners, because suddenly, the Radicalz have become all about Dean Malenko. Nothing against Dean Malenko, but we have to look at the real picture. Benoit didn't need them in the summer, he doesn't need them now.

I slagged off Billy Gunn there. Expect that quite a lot. Ok, he's improving his in-ring ability, but he still sucks. His reign as Intercontinental Champion was appalling, and made even worse by pink glittery shorts, and 80s music so bad that it makes Achy Breaky Heart look like a classic. And don't even get me started on The One. He's carrying Chyna, or Chyna's carrying him, either way no-one cares. The paralysis angle is sickening, and I bet Droz wouldn't be laughing. It comes a close second to the racist Lo Down / Tiger Ali Singh crap that we get forced to listen to. I'm not D'lo's biggest fan, but the guy does not need to be wallowing in a pitiful tag team when he was once the Euro-Continental Champion.

Other mid-carders that need looking out for include Eddie Guerrero. If only he could stop getting injured. If you remember, he rubbed some heat off Triple H during the 'face turn' and is a good in-ring performer. He just needs to fend for himself a bit. I'm throwing Rikishi into this category too. I'm not convinced by his heel turn, all he's done for me is show that he can walk slowly when he enters. I can see him restarting some mix with Tazz. Now here's a performer. Away from our screens for so long, busy commentating in the States. He comes back, and got an incredible ovation for his match with Raven on Sunday Night Heat. Although he'll probably stay in the Hardcore division for a while, he can go on to be huge. The WWF may try to give up on packaging him as a heel for now, and let the cheers roam. His feud with Raven will bring back ECW memories. The Raven Effect will get its exposure this year. As for Test, his on-off flirtation with the big time looks set to start again. But does anyone care? And finally K-Kwik, if he can find his feet on his own, can be and will be huge. He'll probably pair up with Too Cool for a bit, which will let the dancing hip-hop stars remember what it was like to be famous. But if he smartens up, he'll have a great year.

Tag teams time, and who can stop Edge and Christian? Well probably the Dudleyz at the rumble, but for them to have held the straps 5 times (if you include Los Conquistadors) last year shows where the WWF thinks the talent lie. Don't get me wrong, between them, the Dudleyz and the Hardyz, there isn't a lot of difference. Except for mic skills. And was anyone in the federation better last year than these two? And I include the Rock. Expect a face turn, and somewhere down the line this year, a break-up. The Dudleyz and The Hardyz will carry the baton, but throw the Acolytes into the mix, and potentially Saturn and Malenko, and you've got 4 teams to take on the year. Sorry dancing fans, but Too Cool just can't cut it anymore. They need a new gimmick or split up time. Lo Down can get bent for all I care. There, I said it. And then the women of the WWF. Molly Holly and Lita are crying out to have a feud, but with them both being faces, it looks messy. Something has to give. Chyna looks set to go after the Women's title for a bit, which is where she belongs to be honest. The Kat might do something other than strip for The King. Stripping for me? I can hope. Jacqui's working well with the Acolytes, that's coming along nicely. But do they need her? Even Ivory's doing well with this RTC gimmick. Quick poll ObstaB fans. RTC - Are you sick to death of it? If you said no, wow, you're brave. If you said yes, ha! It means its working. And as for Trish, she'll continue to job, and be my future wife while she's at it. But this will be her year as she goes main street as a manager.

Two men left.

Regal may have just been used as cover for HHH for a while, but he'll continue to be big this year. A corporate role, followed by this feud with Test should steady him. He's our British boy, and I'm rooting for him to have a good year.

And what of The Rock? Well, the big Wrestlemania X-Seven headline would do nicely for him. After that, Rocky's gonna make movies. And the millions... and millions of the Rock's fans will have to sit back and cheer someone else. The Rock will stand by for most of 2001 to give someone else a shot. But he'll be back. And also the first ever 6-time World Champ.

Alright, that's my monthly BS.

OK, thanks to Dave for giving me a shot.

If you've read this, have any comments, questions, insults (I'll beat you), ability to make me a cool banner, ideas, or general words that you'd like me to read, my e-mail address is [email protected]

And I think I'll end it here by controversially saying that Kaientai rock. Indeed.

And that's the Bottom Line, cos ObstaB said so.