Just as Bob was finishing up his suicide note, Rob Ray came over and punched him in the face.
"Shit man," said Rob, "I always do that. I'm sorry, I meant to give you this. Someone in the corner told me to give it to you."
Bob looked over in the corner and saw Eric Boulton quickly turn away. He read the note.
Bob,
I feel you have been injusticed by the man. Watch in practice today, I
think you will be greatly pleased.
Sincerely,
Mr. Mystery
Bob was intrigued. What would happen at practice? Was this Mr. Mystery really the hot Scot from Halifax, Nova Scotia? He couldn't wait to finish his chicken wings and get on the ice. He swallowed the rest whole and ran to put on his gear.
***
The ice was crisp and cold. As is custom, Martin Biron took the ice first, gliding gracelessly across the surface. Bob, as usual, was just behind Vaclav Varada as the last man on the ice.
The practice progressed mostly as normal, other than one of Curtis
Brown's occasional temper-tantrums because Biron left the net just before he shot. Bob was actively sitting on the bench, watching for something to happen. Then it did.
Eric came in on a breakaway drill. The team let him do this mostly for humour, as Eric would never ever score on a breakaway. Eric slowly approached the net, intently focused on Martin's glossy sheen. Martin laid across the crease, knowing that Eric was not capable of lifting the puck off of the ice. Eric wound up for his shot, but instead of shooting he lept into the air and laid a wicked power drop on Martin's groinular region.
The team simultaneously grasped their crotch and hunched over in assumed pain.
"What the cheezum!??" yelled Lindy Ruff.
Everyone had a look of disgust on their face. Everyone, except Bob and Eric. Eric winked at Bob and Bob blushed in admiration. He saw his opportunity.
"Lindy," said Bob, "Put me in. I can do it."
"Who do you think you are?" said Lindy, "Security! Oh. Wait. You're that Bob guy. What do you want?"
"I want to play."
Lindy laughed louder than Bob thought any man could and simply pointed to Bob's spot on the bench. As Bob coasted dejectedly, Lindy shouted out, "Where's the Mika?"
The lights of the arena went dim as the first strains of "Also Sprach Zarathustra" by Richard Strauss came over the speaker system. Mika appeared at the entrance to the rink as a shower of light poured upon his Finnish finesse. He raised his arms, apparently summoning some ungodly power and leapt onto the ice. After skating around the rink 3 times, Mika stopped on a dime in front of Lindy and said, "Hva er begivenhet?"
"Get in the net you kook."
As Mika was skating to the net, Eric took out a sword and sliced a hole in Mika's stomach.
"That was completely uncalled for Eric," said Lindy. "Go get a mop and clean it up."
Eric crossed in front of Bob on the way to the janitor's closet and smiled. Bob smiled back and had to suppress a school-girl giggle as Lindy was approaching him.
"Well Bob," said Lindy, "looks like you are all we have."
"No," said Jason Woooollllleeeeyyy, the team snitch, "He is not the only one."
Chapter 16 - Bob Gets Benched (Again)
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