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Positive Futures VS:: advice

advice

Tue, 19 Jan 1999 16:16:39 EST
SMSJDR@aol.com

Hello everyone!

This is the first time I'm going to ask everyone for advice online about an
ongoing personal/financial positive futures issue. It all has to do with my
husband's family. They have decided they want to do a family reunion, and I
raised the concern about cost, since I have no interest in staying in luxury
accommodations and cannot fathom going out for dinner every night, which is
what I fear they expect. This concern is especially pertinent since we're
about to buy our first house, and money is going to be fairly tight to begin
with.

So I said I wasn't sure if we could afford to do it. Since then, all hell has
broken loose and I feel like I've been labeled the family's tightwad. My
husband has announced that he's going no matter what the cost, and I can go or
not. I talked to him about it again last night and expressed the fact that I'd
like to go and I like his family but I think money is a legitimate concern,
and I don't feel like anyone is giving me the time of day. He said he thinks
it is a legitimate concern and he's still going no matter what the cost, and I
can still go or stay home. Not very encouraging. At this point, I don't feel
like going at all, and I'm not sure if that will make matters worse. Word has
already spread like wildfire through the family that I'm complaining about
money, and I'm hesitant to raise any concerns again. I want to go and make a
statement that his family is important, but I don't feel like I'm getting the
message back from them that my concerns are important.

Any suggestions?

Suzanne in NH, soon to be happily moving to VT.