Hello All. I know I�ve been away for a very long time now, but I�m back and ready to bore you into a catatonic state with my inane ramblings about the inconsequential existence of one Steven S. Wisdom�Esquire. I know you�ve all been chomping at the bit like the proverbial stallions you are waiting for the gates to open and a stream of consciousness to spew forth. Well I should get started before you become old enough to be put out to pasture.
Beginning at the End�of WEF
As of April 30th of this year, I terminated my employment with the Water Environment Federation. Please note that �I� terminated it. I�ll explain. For about the past 3 years, my responsibilities and performance with WEF began a steady decline. I as well as my supervisor struggled to find a cause to this because we both knew I was more than capable of doing the job. Of course, the answer was pretty simple, but didn�t occur to me until November of last year, I was totally and thoroughly bored with what I was doing. My existence with WEF consisted primarily of spending a lot of time organizing and launching projects that would never be finished or at least endlessly delayed; writing an endless stream of questions (during my employment I imagine I wrote close to 3500 or more questions); grading the occasional training course that would trickle in; and marketing the few products we did sell�unsuccessfully. When I started with WEF we were just beginning to get off the ground with CD-ROM based training and had hopes of moving into the online market. Things looked relatively promising and interesting. But due to poor sales of our CDs, we would never realize those goals while I was there (maybe never?). I was now a bored technical writer/project manager and not a very good one at that. Unfortunately I just didn�t care anymore and it showed. You�d have to have been blind not to notice my apathy. My supervisor did notice and called me on it more than once. The beginning of the end had arrived.
Around the end of 2003, we had a long talk and it was then I realized how I felt and began to formulate a plan to leave one way or another. I began to save some money for what I thought might be a move to a new location, but it actually wound up being used to survive. I started looking for a job in November and continued to do so for a long time. As of February, nothing had come up, but I still felt positive I�d find something and felt more negative about WEF so I secretly told my bosses I planned to leave around the time my supervisor returned from her maternity leave (sometime in April). After a little discussion the April 30th deadline was set and I was off to the races to find a job before April 30�which obviously didn�t happen hence there would be no Unemployment Chronicles now would there.
There was a small, quiet party as everyone prepared for my departure. I told most of my coworkers I had something lined up so there wouldn�t be any concerns or loose talk. I realized I would miss this place a little. After all, I learned a lot working there and it helped make me more professional and detail-oriented. Of course I would really miss my CTO (Combined Time Off) and the fact I was getting paid a decent salary for doing very little actual work. Thus as I scarfed down my pizza and drank my soda while joking with the people I knew all too well, I mentally closed the book on WEF and began pondering just what the hell was I going to do now.
April Showers Bring May Stinkweeds
By the time I left WEF I already had dozens of resumes floating around the country. Within the first week of my unemployment I interviewed with three different companies and even the EPA�but got nothing. Even at this early stage my lazy cells, sensing my new found freedom, began to replicate and go into overdrive. Around this time I received my last paycheck from WEF and decided I would simply take my time and look for a good job whether here in DC or anywhere. I had enough money set aside to last me for awhile so thus I began the lifestyle that would establish me as the �Laziest Person my Friends Know�. I know it doesn�t have a very cool ring to it, but I wear this title with distinction.
Let me warn you now that the rest of this account is incredibly dull. Why? Because I didn�t do a damn thing the rest of the summer. My days consisted of the following:
1. Wake up around noonish (10-1)
2. Eat some sort of food
3. Surf for jobs and send out several resumes (3-4 hours at most)
4. Play games, watch anime, or movies
5. Eat some more food
6. Play more games, watch anime, or movies
7. Go to bed around 1-2 a.m.
The only things I ventured outside of home for was food, games, and going to see a movie on Friday with the boys. The only real hobby I had during this time was growing a beard, affectionately known as The Beard of Doom. Are you excited yet? Have I dazzled you with my crazy lifestyle?
June � A Classified Break in the Routine
So in June I was hitting my stride for Power Laziness (Like Power Walking without the walking...or anything else for that matter) when one of my best friends and I decided they would come here to visit me. So I actually had to become active. I knew I would have to show this person around, so I started exercising a little. For hygiene�s sake I shaved the Beard of Doom (it was a sad day) and thoroughly cleaned my pig sty/apartment. Overall, the visit went well and this person got to meet all my friends and learned about the craziness that we put forth. Good experience for all of us.
Let me just explain why I�m not going into detail about this particular event. This person and I have a sort of non-disclosure agreement when it comes to personal details. Although I truly believe that I don�t exactly have the readership to warrant any concerns about privacy (most everyone that reads this already knows what happened). I have come to respect other people�s feelings in regards to putting information about their lives on the net�at least not without their permission. Typically when I talk about these things I do my best to keep the information as cryptic as possible so that unless you already know us, you won�t have a clear understanding of what I�m talking about. I might talk about What, Where, and/or When but never give out the Who or Why. As for me, I have no problem sharing my life�s story in all its horrible glory. Let me just conclude by saying that, if I had permission to give out all the details of my friend�s visit, I could write a goddamned novel. In fact, I may just do that someday.
Well after this event I decided to redouble my efforts at finding a job but, other than that, my life went back to the way it was and the month of June ended unceremoniously�except of course for Spider Man 2 which was the shiznite.
July � No Fireworks on the Job Front
July actually started out pretty well. Ace wanted to go see Dave Chappelle in Richmond. In fact, he wanted to go so bad he bought tickets for Kricket, Erka, and me. All that was required of me was my car. Kricket even drove so there was still minimal effort on my part�just the way I like it.
*Side Note: This was technically the second time Kricket chauffeured me and Slick (First for Erka). The first time was sometime in June when we hounded him to drive us to 7-11 on an ever-vital Slurpee run. Sure we took my car but, once again, minimal effort was maintained. So next time you see Kricket, ask him if he�ll give you a ride somewhere. He loves to do that�especially if you�re white.*
The Chappelle concert was amazing despite the fact the seats in the theater were built in the 40s and obviously designed for dwarves or at least young asian people. Dave raised important issues regarding the R. Kelly trial, etiquette for friends that pass out at parties and botoxing one�s genitals...thought provoking. I can�t wait for the DVD of this material. The best part of this trip for me was that the concert was at 11 p.m. on a Thursday night. We didn�t get home until 3 and I was secure in the knowledge I didn�t have zippy to do the next day�beautiful.
For the 4th, we had a BBQ at Elise�s house. It was a nice time. During the Q we watched Spider Man on DVD. This inspired Sport to go see Spider Man 2 again later that night and he it took little convincing to get me to tag along. However, I was literally left at the altar of Spider-goodness as Champ had to leave 10 minutes into the movie for personal reasons.
As for the rest of the month�one interview and a whole lot of nothing.
This ends the bulk of the Chronicles. Stay tuned to this website for the thrilling conclusion. Which for those of you that are brain dead means I got a job�hence the conclusion. I�ll post it up probably in a few days from now. As for the future of this site I plan to start keeping my focus on the games and my friends and I will post up our take on the biz.