Note: This poem was written as a gift for my Beta Reader, Vash is my Angel.
It is reproduced here, with her permission.
Any other use of this poem, by anyone other than Vash is my Angel, is strictly prohibited.

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Betas are the very best,
They never let our standards rest.
They put our stories through the paces,
Checking them for all the traces
Of things that simply aren't quite right.
They're there for us, both day and night.

They check our spelling and punctuation,
They guard us against ego inflation,
They polish our work and make it shine,
And, if your beta is like mine...
They give virtual carrots and occasional whapping
To plotbunnies that are caught a-napping.

They discuss the characters and the plot,
They tell us if something is awful or not.
And when a writer is all shaken
Over a direction a fic has taken,
A good beta will always be there,
Giving naked plushies to show they care.

Sometimes fierce and sometimes caring,
When our grammar needs repairing.
And betas can be very picky,
If our sex scenes are too squicky.
They crack the whip, they pet, they fuss.
Yes, betas do a lot for us.

So if your plot has a gaping hole
That's feeding on your very soul,
If your Joey's more dead than alive
And your Kaiba simply doesn't jive,
Get a beta, your towel don't throw it.
(Hey, I never said I was a poet!)