Shut up and read this.



Here's what happened when I decided to go to the computer store:

		I wanted to buy a new sound port and card for my computer so I decided to go to Future Shop. Once inside, there were these "people"...I could have sworn they were from out of town. They all reeked of cabbage and rotten tomato juice...As to my surprise, they were standing in front of the products that I have been looking for. It was a dire situation. As I approached them, I noticed they were holding these "action figures". The moment after seeing them, it hit me. They were World of Warcraft action figures. I couldn't believe it. W.o.W. fans. I had to think fast. I noticed I've been carrying my holy water and giant sized cross. But it was not enough. I knew this for a fact after past experiences dealing with brainswashed W.o.W. fanatics. Suddenly, one of them started to converse with one another. The words "level", "orc" and "tooth paste" were frequently used to much dismay that my human mind could not comprehend the conversations these young fools were having. I lost consciousness. A few hours later or so I have thought, I found myself outside the computer store, lying besides the alley walls. The sound card and port were resting on my hands as I got up. Weird, I never bought these... Then, I found a note inside the plastic bag were my stuff was in. It read:

			FOOL! YOU CANNOT FULFILL YOUR CAMPAIGN TO RUIN WORLD OF WARCRAFT! OUR SUPERIOR POWERS WILL NOT BE DEFEATED BY THE LIKES OF YOU! WE LOVE TO EAT CABBAGE! STOP YOUR SO CALLED "GOAL" AT ONCE OR FACE DIRE CONSEQUENCES! -W.o.W. Anarchists

	(Translated from the original writing form of "elite speak", the form this note was originaly written in)

	I can safely say that I've made dangerous new enemies, and it is now unsafe to leave the house. Oh well, I'll just have to be more careful next time im around W.o.W. geeks. But I know they'll be back....very soon.

		End Part I

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