Now you may find it inconceivable or at the very least a bit unlikely that the relative position of the planets and the stars could have a special deep significance or meaning that exclusively applies only to you, but let me give you my assurance that the forecast and predictions are all based on scientific documented evidence, so you would have to be some kind of moron not to realize that every single one of these is absolutely true.......Where was I?
Ohhhh, this is the story bout a guy named Al, and he lived in a sewer with his hampster pal, but the sanitation workers really didn't approve, so he packed up his accordion and had to move to a city in Ohio where he lived in a tree, and he worked at a nasal decongestant factory, and he played on the company bowling team, and every single night he had a strange recurring dream where he was wearing lederhosen in a vat of sour cream, but that's really not important to the story. Well, the very next year he met a dental hygienist with a spatula tattooed on her arm (on her arm....) but he didn't keep in touch, and he lost her number, and he got himself a job on a tater tot farm, and he spent his life savings on a split-level cave, twenty miles below the surface of the earth (of the earth..) and he really makes a mighty fine jelly-bean-and-pickle sandwich [{for what it's worth...}]. One day Al was in the forest, trying to get a tan, when he heard the tortured screaming of a funny little man. He was caught in a bear trap and Al set him free, and the guy that he rescued was grateful as can be, and it turns out he's a big-shot producer on TV, so he gives Al a contract, and what do you know? N
ow he's got his very own... WEIRD....AL....SHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOW!
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