Duo chuckled quietly. “So, am I invited in, or do I get to continue standing here awkwardly all day?”

Heero stared, dumbstruck, realizing now he had no idea how to act. Duo didn’t know any of what he’d been through. He didn’t know what he felt for him. All he knew was that dream... and that brief moment of eye contact... then... then.... Hell, then something Heero couldn’t even FATHOM.

Cressida, luckily, recovered quicker. “Uh—eh—c—come... in... Duo....” she stuttered, unable to stop staring.

Duo smirked and nodded, padding into the apartment as stealthily as ever. He quietly closed the door behind himself, then looked back and forth between the twin sets of amazed eyes. “C’mon, guys,” he groaned with a joking tone, “You’re creeping me out here. It’s not like I’m de—“

Before Duo could finish, Heero had launched himself off the wall, gripping the startled boy in a desperate hug. The Japanese ex-pilot discovered Duo’s
skin to be ice to the touch but his breath on his neck was warm. Heero shuddered, missing the stronger shudder that ran completely through Duo’s body at the contact.

Cressida managed to finally shut her mouth and turned, blushing in embarrassment, as she wandered into the living room, to a discreet corner where she hoped she wouldn’t get in the way.

After a moment of stunned silence where all that was heard was Heero’s quickened breath and all that could be felt was a set of pounding hearts, Duo raised his arms and lightly patted Heero’s back. “Hey, Heero, it’s ok, sheesh. No need to look so upset, it’s just me.” Heero shuddered, burying his face in the place where Duo’s neck and shoulders met, feeling only Duo, wanting nothing more than for that moment to last for an eternity and beyond.

But after a little longer, Duo shivered and rubbed Heero’s back comfortingly in a manner to suggest the hug was over and he wanted out.

Heero very reluctantly let go and stepped back, unable to look into the amethyst eyes for fear of breaking down and never pulling himself together again. Duo watched Heero’s expression solemnly a moment before he ducked his head, dropping his gaze to the floor.

There were a few moments of silence, broken only by the distant humming of the radio from Heero’s bedroom and the soft sounds of the traffic from outside. The moment stretched and swirled, threatening to drown everyone in their intense thoughts. But, once again, the nothingness was broken by an amused voice.

“Nice to see you too, Yuy. Figured I’d stop in, check out what you’ve been up to, y’know.” He paused, seeing Heero apparently struggling within himself, then nodded gravely. His trademark grin slipped onto his face, as bright as ever despite the hint of sadness tainting his violet eyes. He moved past the silent Japanese boy, wandering around with an appreciative look. “Got yourself an apartment, huh? Wow... 8th floor too.... Never would’ve figured it, really. Seems kinda high for someone who likes as many escape routes as possible....” Duo’s voice trailed off as he entered the bathroom.

Heero opened his mouth to explain the height, to explain everything, but the words were caught in his throat. It had all seemed so easy for that year, that if he ever found Duo again he’d blurt it all out and it would all be fine. But now, faced with those amethyst eyes and that jester’s smile, unbroken but reserved, he felt himself freeze.

What if Duo rejected him?

What if his fear of only mourning his mission failure and not loss of love was true?

What if he didn’t truly love Duo?

What if this was just a cruel dream...?

Heero was surprised to see Duo standing beside him (the boy seemed even more silent than Heero remembered) and didn’t even notice when his face slipped into his emotionless mask. Somewhere inside he screamed at himself to clutch Duo again and never let go this time, but the voice was pressed down by his intention to understand what was happening first.

Duo smiled drolly and turned his back, wandering toward the living room. Heero watched his back mournfully, imagining his long rope of a braid to be swinging instead of those dark spikes that seemed so out of place. Slowly, he followed what he hoped was still his friend.

Duo had just sat down and was smiling at Cressida. “Hey Dori, how’s it goin’?”

Cressida stared at him a moment but then her eyes softened and she felt tears slip from her eyes. “Well, Duo. Very well. I’m... I’m glad to see you.”

Duo grinned, “Yeah. Well.” he said noncommittally.

Heero took a seat at one of the two chairs at either end of the couch, facing Cressida who was in the other. Duo was sprawled out in the middle of
the couch, eyeing the tv thoughtfully.

“You actually watch that?” he asked Heero, tipping his head toward the black screen.

/When the moon shines the light on the ground
I just run where my thoughts take me to/

Heero stared at Duo, wondering if this was real since it seemed too good to be true and none of it made sense. He had held Duo in his arms as he turned
to ash and suddenly he was here, sitting in his living room, looking the same as before except the spiky hair and strange expressions of reservation, talking as if he’d been gone for a weekend and missed Heero moving into a new home. How could those eyes be so alive? How could his breath be so warm? How could he be so –real-??

Cressida was saying, “He leaves it on a lot, actually,” as explanation after Heero didn’t answer, instead staring at Duo with sheltered Prussian eyes.

Duo nodded at Cressida, giving Heero a strange look. “Never would’ve expected that of you, Heero. You always hated distractions.” He grinned but there was a hint of reproach in his eyes that Heero, too distracted by this beautiful vision before him, couldn’t see. Cressida did, though, and she slid her eyes closed.

Heero blinked, finally noticing that Duo was staring at him expectantly, and quickly ran over what had apparently just been asked of him. His eyes widened slightly when he realized the question and opened his mouth to explain, but found himself speaking a defensive lie instead, “I watch the news.”

Duo’s eyes darkened considerably at the comment, confusing Heero even more and setting him more off balance and flustered. The American nodded after a
moment, murmuring, “Ah.”

It was quiet a moment before Cressida cleared her throat. “So... uh... Duo.... How have—I mean—are you...?”

Duo cut her off with a firm, “Fine,” that spoke volumes. He wouldn’t be explaining anything right now. If ever.

Heero swallowed, screaming at himself inwardly to tell him, damnit, TELL HIM what he wanted to say! What he’d been meaning to tell him for a year
now! But every time he opened his mouth, he found his voice wouldn’t comply and all he ended up doing was look even more nervous. He glared menacingly,
directing the anger inside as his face set in a cold mask. He had to tell him. He HAD to! This was too fucking important!

“Duo,” Heero said shakily, scowling at his hands, “Ai—Ai—“ (1)

“Later, Heero. I gotta get going,” Duo said coolly as he pushed himself up. Heero looked up in surprise, all protests dying in his throat as he saw the look of cold anger in Duo’s eyes, making the amethyst sharp and pained.

“But—“ he managed barely, but Duo was already walking away.

“People to see, things to do,” Duo said airily, but in a tone that was as cold as his touch. “I’ll see you around.” He paused and suddenly barked a mirthless laugh at that just as he reached the door.

Heero was in shock.

Duo was alive.

Duo was HERE.

But before he could understand anything, before he could even tell Duo the most important thing in the Universe right now, Duo had seemed so angry. Why? What had he said? <What did I DO?!> Heero lamented, screaming inwardly even as he stared blankly ahead, trying to process what was happening.

<No! I can’t lose him just when I found him! I can’t lose him again!!> Heero forced himself to stand and turn, taking a falty step toward Duo as his hand uselessly extended. “Duo....” he said quietly, full of sadness and not a small amount of grief.

Duo paused halfway out the door, his eyes softening the slightest bit as he said less angrily, “Hope you two are happy.” With that he disappeared from
the apartment, almost as if he had never been there in the first place.

Cressida was already running across the apartment, throwing the door open and yelling, “DUO!” desperately as she bolted into the hallway. She slid
into the opposite wall, scanning the empty hall searchingly then running for the elevator and stairs, still calling his name.

Back in the apartment, Heero stayed frozen in the same position, his Prussian eyes emanating the heartbreak his body refused to acknowledge. Distantly, he felt himself drop to the ground, still staring at the swinging door, willing Duo to return and smile and laugh and let him tell him. Let him tell him....

<Why do I live on the 8th floor, Duo? Why do I leave the tv going all the time...? Because the tv reminds me of you, Duo. The noise. I need it. To remind myself you’re out there... somewhere.... Talking like always.... Laughing like always.... As beautiful as ever....> Heero swallowed, feeling his eyes burn with the need to cry, though his body refused to give his heart that break. He had been the Perfect Soldier too long. He had denied his emotions for too many years to suddenly start showing them again. <And why do I live on the 8th floor where, if there were a fire, I’d probably be killed...?>

“/’Cause I can’t live in this world... without love.... Without you/”

Heero whispered to himself, finally dropping a hand to the (2) ground listlessly.

/Ohhhh/

Cressida sprinted after Duo desperately, hoping to find him in time, to tell him what he needed to hear. Obviously there had to have been some sort of misunderstanding for Duo to be so upset, but she had no clue what it had been. The only thing she could think of was that Heero was being slightly cold, but hadn’t he always been that way...?

“DUO! Please! Wait!!”

She skidded to a stop when she saw Duo paused at the bottom of the first flight of steps down, his head cocked slightly so she saw the outline of his features but not his expression. She drew jagged breath, feeling her lungs burn at the pressure, trailing her hand on the railing as she slowly stepped down, closer to him.

“Duo... what’s wrong...?” she asked softly, hoping her concern was winning through her being out of breath.

Duo didn’t move or answer.

She went down three more steps, now about 10 separating her and the now spiky-haired boy. “Are you alright...?”

Again no answer.

Again another step.

“Duo, do you need to talk about anything...? I’m here. Heero’s here. He’s—“

“I’m glad to see you made it, Dori. I was afraid you hadn’t,” Duo said softly, but coolly.

Cressida frowned. “Duo, you know my name is Cressi—“

“-Do- I?” Duo interrupted her with a firm, cool tone. He turned so he was staring her directly in the eyes and she gasped at the pain she saw radiating from him. “Do I know –anything- anymore, Dori? _Do_ I?” She saw the pleading in his posture but when she took another step down, he stepped back and faced her fully. “Times have changed, Dori. _I_ have changed. Same with Heero,” he almost spit the name in anger but Cressida saw the pain in his eyes and she honestly had no idea what to do, what he was so angry yet sad at. “So why don’t you guys deal with it and leave me alone?”

Cressida’s eyes widened as she finally saw a sense of betrayal flash through Duo’s features. “Duo—Heero and I—!”

“Have a fun life, Cress,” Duo said icily, his eyes narrowed to menacing, glittering stars. Before she could react, Duo’s very image seemed to shift and skew, then he vanished. She stared, eyes wide, swallowing.

“Oh shit,” she said softly to herself, finally understanding where they stood. “How the fuck did he become a Nightwalker...?”

(1) I’d be surprised if any of you guys didn’t know this, but ‘ai’ means love in Japanese. If you were to tell someone “I love you” you could say “Ai shiteiru”, which is presumably what Heero is trying to spit out. However, “ai” sounds like “I” in English....

(2) Ok, TOTALLY ruining the mood here but it made me laugh. Just as I was typing this, Duo’s song “It’s So Alright” popped up on my playlist. How amusing.... Sorry. Go back to being depressed and pissed at the evil fic writer who won’t let Duo and Heero be happy together... BWAHAHAHA! >:)