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| Henry - Wow, that ride must be really scary. Those two guys are holding hands! Jimmy - That's the line for cotton candy. I see and like, he said, "Oh my God, did you say glis?" And they're all like, "We all heard you say 'glis'" and, uh, I'm like, what the hell happened with my credit card? - Sean Sean - [Finding a box belonging to Eddie] Whats this? Eddie - It's cool. Sean - "It's cool" doesn't answer my question. "Its cool" doesn't tell me what's in the box. Eddie - Yes it does. It tells you its cool. Sean - Is it illegal? Eddie - Not everywhere. Sean -Will it explode and kill us all? Eddie - I can personally guarantee that it will not. [Sean shakes it] Eddie - Hey, thats not smart. Fine, put me on hold. I love listening to the "Music to Kill Yourself By" collection. - Sean Hello, Rochelle? No, I do not want to give you my account number and I shall tell you why: because I have already keyed it in three times and given it to several different people including a Beth, a Jos�, and someone who was really rude to me named Kevin. And I think I speak for all Americans when I say that we are SICK of having to call something in and key in the number and then being asked what the number was we keyed in before! Alright? So why dont you get a piece of paper--have you heard of that? And a pen AND WRITE THE DAMN NUMBERS DOWN! - Sean Eddie - Hey wait, arent you going to ask if she has any experience? Sean - Do you have any experience? Nicole - Yes. Sean - Thats impressive, thats impressive. Henry - Is it extreme, cos I dont waste my time on things that arent extreme. Sean - Its so extreme it almost killed Tony Hawk. Lily - Uncle Eddie, did you ever have something happen to you and you werent quite sure what it was? Eddie - Im familiar with that sensation. Lily - Do you realise this is no help? Eddie - Or, is it all the help you need? Sean - Come on baby, youre overreacting. Claudia - Just admit it, your getting some cheap thrill having your high school fantasy prancing around your bar at your beckon call. Sean - Oh thats it yeh you found me out. You uncovered the diabolical plot, that Ive been hatching for 17 years to get Nicole Fiordelissi all to myself, thats right. But first I would marry you and have three children to throw the suspicion off, thats right. Then I would open and bar and fix it up and put an ad in the paper for a bartender knowing full well that Nicole Fiordelissi was looking for a job at that exact moment. Then I would lure her in here with benefits and insurance and free pretzels to have her all to myself! But no! I was foiled by you; and you pesky dog: Scooby Do! Claudia - So Nicole, are you married? Nicole - Hardly. Claudia - God well that must be great, having all that freedom. Nicole - Im havin a good time. Claudia - I bet you are... And workin in a bar, youll meet a lot of guys. Nicole - Oh Ill admit, it does present some opportunities. Claudia - And you were never one to pass up opportunities, for sex, with a man, any man... Nicole - Excuse me?! Claudia - What? Nicole - What did you just say? Claudia - Well I honestly dont remember... But I certainly did not call you a whore... Nicole - WHAT?! Claudia - No no no no I said I didnt call you a whore. You; Nicole Fiordelissi, in my opinion, are not a whore. Not at all a whore. Nicole - Wait, hold on, it seems to me that you were in fact, calling me a whore. Claudia - No no no... *Pause* Whore... Oh I am now! |
| Below are some of my favourite quotes from Grounded for Life |