Subject: Test Stana
From: Stana Hierspiel <darkannex@yahoo.com>
Date: Tue, 27 Apr 1999 17:40:39 -0700 (PDT)

      Stana stepped forward, bracing against a sudden chill
in the air.
There was a hollow rasping sound to the wind as it whipped
by her. 
      She heard whispers behind and turned. There was
nothing. No Clip,
no Teri, no Emily or Shinji or Wataru...noone. 
       "Hello?" she asked quietly, the word being swallowed
as a blast
of air nearly knocked her off her feet. She gasped,
covering her head
with her arms as the rancid breath washed over and around. 
        Whispers sussurated past and she turned again. 
        "Who's there?" Stana shouted. "Hello?!"
        No answer. Just the whispers. She listened to her
heart
slamming in her ears. She listened to the siblant sounds
then nothing.
Silence.
         Her chest heaved a few times, and she swallowed
quickly.
         The ground beneath her burst upwards with grasping
dead hands.
She screamed as they latched onto her legs, trying to bury
her with
them. Grinning half rotted smiles leered at her, and she
struggled,
pulling free.  There was the sound of putrified flesh
squishing in as
she lashed out with her fists. Then the sickening feeling
as her hands
sunk into yielding faces.
          Then she was free, running forward even as she
felt the
whispers growing around her again until they were a roar of
shouts.
Fingers snaked and fastened onto her clothes and skin, the
voices rose
to a crescendo of fury and she was jerked around-
          Nothing.
          It took a few moments until the fact made itself
evident
through her feverish mind. Nothing, _nothing_ was there. 
Noone,
nothing.
           Her body shuddered, tears squeezing from under
her eyelids. 
Red swam in her sight. She reached up to wipe her eyes
angrily. Her
fingers came away covered in blood. Her hands were
decaying. She
screamed.
           A flash of white and she was standing still in
total
darkness. A single light shone on her, revealing
unblemished skin, no
blood. 
           A white silken gown tapered off to the ground,
pooling
around her feet like a whirlpool.  She tucked her hair
behind her ears
with a shaking hand.  
            It was getting colder in here, breath streamed
from her
lips.  With a small shiver Stana crossed her arms over her
chest. She
was going to try and walk out of the circle, but the total
dark outside
this circle terrified her. She was afraid of the dark. To
her ears
there was the faint sound of squirming things out there.
She knew the
moment she moved out of the light, they would get her... . 
             Maybe it was the dead people-the ones she had
left at the
entrance to the wizards' chamber. They had wanted her to
join
them-maybe she already had and just didnt realize it yet.
The 
increadible and cosmic joke being that death ended it all,
and then
there was a long nightmare after.
             ::Nightmare?:: Why did that thought jump into
her mind and
grab hold? 
             *FLASH* Brigh lights filling her world, the
screech of
tires squealing on tar-a thump and silence. A girl crying
out for her
best friend as mothers screamed. Flaxen hair ribboned with
red and
gray...
             *Flash* Hair the color of the autumn leaves,
burning
brightly in the early morning. With a set expression the
girl climbed
the tree, took the rope in her hands and placed it around
her neck
before leaping...
             *Flash* leaping from the back of a pickup, the
man
miscalculated, impaling himself on a stake jutting out of
the ground.
Gore splashed in the grass, watering the young trees with a
grisly
feast. A hoarse voice calling her name...
             *Flash* tear filled voice, shaking hands, a
newspaper
rustling and the name of Sarah Michelle Mitzen... . Victim
of rape and
murder.
             Faster and faster images whipped by, as
everyone she had
ever lost died and left her alone and bereft. Weighed down
with the
memories of the dead she had not been able to feel truly
alive in so
long. Carrying the banners of her loved ones like a lead
anchor, slowly
dragging her down with them until she felt dead too. No
light, no hope,
no breath.
              ::Cold:: the thought penetrated again, more
insistant as
her temperature plummeted. She could stay here and freeze
in the light,
or go into the dark where the dead were. 
               Wasn't there any other way? There had to
be-didnt there?
What about the rest of the world-surely THEY had been able
to take a
different, less lonely path? It couldnt all be pretend... .

               Could it?
               She knew the moment she touched the dark she
would go
mad. Knew it in a way she could never define. She knew
because of what
she was.
               ::_WHAT_ she was?::
               There was light, and pain in her body as
muscles felt
unreal, her body felt different, not her own...there was a
double
vision blurring everything-or was that the cold?
               As she threw back a head heavy with
unfamiliar burden,
the thought came crystal clear that this wasn't real. The
jewel at her
neck, not cold or burdensome, glowed warmly, the balance in
the Yin and
Yang even and perfect, and with that warmth, a path opened
up. 
               Spiraling up and forbidding. Ice sculptured
and of a
hopeles height. The path that Sullam spoke of. The path few
ever
attained. 
              Stana grabbed hold and started to climb.